AIBU to think it's a bit weird to put your photo as a bride as as your main

[LoveforPGTipsMonkey]

profile picture on FB/Twitter? especially if you haven't just got married!
Isn't it like saying 'I'm a wife first and foremost'?

I think you're looking into it far too much. I reckon most people just pick a photo they think they look nice in & they aren't particularly trying to 'present' themselves as anything with that photo other than a user of social media.
If you're the sort of person who picks on every detail of someone's profile pic i.e. 'odd veil, heavy/unnatural makeup' - then you'd probably rip them to shreds for having a natural, normal, everyday photo - 'hair scraped back, not a scrap of makeup'! People can't win either way!

It's not a 'wife' thing at all, it's a vanity/happy day thing.

I agree with MrsHathaway, it's presenting yourself looking like something you do not and that's quite transparent. I have a few linked-in contacts also in wedding garb and it looks odd because a) I know them on a professional basis only and b) they don't look like that.

I guess for FB that's a bit different as it's a Land of Make-Believe anyway.

But really, if you're happy in your use of your wedding day as a profile photo why care what anybody else thinks of it? If you put it in public, it will be judged in public and everybody knows that surely.

If you look so much better in your wedding photos then that's different from your everyday look, isn't it? I certainly don't wear a grand of ivory silk and "done" hair to the supermarket grin And as I tried to explain, I like best the profile pictures which look like people's normal look

This is daft. By this logic, no one would ever use a profile pic of themselves dressed up for any party or special occasion.

I have a wedding profile pic, got married 3 years ago. Mainly because I rarely go on social media so haven't bothered to change it. My husband also has a wedding pic of us both for his profile, and he uses SM much more than I do. Is that because he is a husband first and foremost?

This is one of the reasons I hate social media and keep off it - people like the OP going round judging others on such arbitrary things. I couldn't give a shit what people use as a profile picture (unless it's one of those pouty selfies!)

I change my profile pics occasionally but often they are my wedding pics. I looked bloody gorgeous!!
I have had lovely memories since but life has changed a lot since then and I absolutely loved our wedding day,and for the most part our marriage too.
I am a wife and mother. That is important to me and I couldn't give a flying fuck if it's not important to someone else. I love my friend's choices whether it's their career,their wedding,their kids or a new pair of bloody amazing shoes. Life is short, I won't be on my death bed thinking I should have shown a different fb profile pic

I use my wedding photo. It is me and I happen to like it!

I get what you’re saying, OP, but it feels like you’re reaching. A bit like this:

It’s a lovely photo Jennielou but I’d be wary of uploading images of myself to MN.

I have to say I also think it's a bit tragic when it's past the year mark and you're still using it. But... IA definitely BU because I've just realised that DH still has a profile picture from our wedding day four years ago and I've never judged him for it, so I am clearly being a bit sexist! It just makes me think of those people (who are, let's face it, due to social conditioning mostly women) who become obsessed not just with their wedding but with it being 'their special day'.

I don't understand why some posters are adamant that brides don't look anything like themselves. Yeah we don't all wear wedding dresses & professional hair & makeup every day, but it's still us! We're not lying, it's not like we got a body double for the day in order to make people think we looked better than we really do!
People are allowed to wear makeup & get their hair done & feel like they look their best with all that.

That's a nice picture, Jennielou, it doesn't look like a wedding photo anyway, just a nice, smiley photo of you. I would use that too.

You sound catty!

Weird for tinder, even more weird for grinder, but primarily none of any one else's business.

Oh god, so you can't show off your wedding pics without seeming 'obsessed'with your 'special day'?!

margaret I really really doubt that most people give it that much thought.

Plus, I know loads of men with wedding profile pics from years ago - how do you explain that in terms of sexist social conditioning?

I also think it's a bit weird, but then I also don't count my wedding as The Greatest Day of My Life and I'm fine with that - imagine if that was the pinnacle of your life and you still had 50 years to live!

Not at all weird. I'm struggling to even see the issue.. Up until a week ago my profile picture was 4+ years old. If I had one of me looking amazing at any time I'd use it!

That's an interesting point, MargaretCavnendish. Might it be also that men wearing a suit for a wedding don't look as starkly different from what they'd wear to the office as opposed to some women who wear dresses that they (presumably) wouldn't wear to anywhere but their own wedding?

I wouldn't necessarily glean from a man's photo of him in a suit that it was his wedding picture, he might even be a guest at somebody else's? Less easy to pick up on.

I also think it's a bit weird, but then I also don't count my wedding as The Greatest Day of My Life and I'm fine with that - imagine if that was the pinnacle of your life and you still had 50 years to live!

Do you count every profile pic youve uploaded as the greatest day of your life? No? Why do you assume thats how anyone else thinks?

My wedding wasn't the greatest day of my life. Most stressful day perhaps...

Not wierd. Often one the happiest days of peoples lives. Proud to be married? Celebrating an anniversary. It’s just one of their many roles: along with being a person in themselves, they are also a wife, woman, mother, friend, daughter, sister, worker, etc etc.

I think this poster is male.

Yes I think it’s weird

That's a nice picture, Jennielou, it doesn't look like a wedding photo anyway, just a nice, smiley photo of you. I would use that too.

So you don't think a veil, white lace dress and jeweled hair vine looks like a wedding photo?

Just ask her?

I find it a bit weird too OP, like nothing else has happened in those intervening years. I think that is often the case actually

I'm not a photo person so occassionally switch between two facebook photos, one is me on my wedding day six years ago. It is one I didn't notice being taken, I look happy, never once occurred to me that I was making some kind of statement with it. I got married with hair and make up 'styled' and applied by me (I bought a new lipstick for the occassion!) and it was one of many lovely days in my life.

Putting that level of thought into a picture on facebook is a sign you have too much time on your hands! See a picture you like. Use it as your facebook picture. It is that easy!