To think this is too much food!

[Rudedog]

So one of DDs friends moved away and they have been home for weekend and today - so we have been out for tea before they travelled home, to TGI Fridays.

So it's me and DD, DDs friend, her mum and younger sister.
Another friend and mother came too.

I've been shocked by DDs friend weight gain over the last year, it's gotten worse and now I can see the cause. She is 8 and this is what she was allowed to order for dinner....

From the adult menu - mozzarella sticks, a half rack of BBQ ribs with fries, a massive brownie ice cream thing for pudding....
She ate all that PLUS - half of her mums onion rings, half of her mums shrimp pasta and a lot of her cheesecake
PLUS - most of her younger sisters chicken fingers and fries and ice cream (younger sister barely eats anyway)
PLUS - she asked about everyone else's dinners and were they eating them all and tried hoovering up any leftovers.

She then asked about getting sweets.

I've never seen an adult eat that much let alone an 8 year old. I can't believe she wasn't sick (they've got a long car journey so maybe I've spoken too soon.

Me and other parent were a bit taken a back, other parent said 'aren't you full yet?' - her mum said 'she's such a good eater and she's always hungry' - she spoke like it was a positive thing.

I never make DD clear a plate - we talk a lot about eating until we feel full.

I mean I'm not unreasonable am I that even if you child is 'hungry' you say no - it's too much food!

mrsharrison Op i dont think your post was snide at all. What you witnessed was really shocking and im glad you posted.
The mother of this poor child is a disgrace.

Why are you glad she posted? Will it somehow improve your life?

It's a special uniform - you can't buy it in supermarket, it's from a special shop. It's why she's asked me to help source some

A classmate of my DS had, at age 10, a waistline which was four inches bigger than mine. I must admit that I wondered how the dm of that boy felt when she was buying him trousers in that size.

She's given you an opening into the conversation, OP. Take it, or butt out from judging.

Poor poor girl

It's hard isn't it as diets and dietary norms have changed so much these days that we have acess to this

Her diet and the diet of the whole family clearly needs a huge overhaul doesn't it .

Sigh 😔

After years of being pretty much perfectly formed my Ds1 has developed some flab and I know we need to address it (me too let's face it )

So, it still would stock up to age 11/12 given that's the sizes needed for primary.

If an 8 yr old can't fit into 11-12 trousers that's an issue

So you started a thread in shock at thw amount of food and weight gain now you are back tracking slightly by trying to make out it's not so bad they just don't have a choice of trousers....

What do you want op

This is a serious question to all the people who are annoyed by the OP. If a child was seriously underweight would you be concerned? I don't get why we are told we are judging when we express concern about an overweight child, when, as far as I concerned, it's as much an issue as children being underweight.

To the poster who replied ‘you can’t get fat on a healthy diet’ of course people can! Calories in, calories out. If the calories in are much higher than out, they will gain weight even if eating healthy food choices. People can simply eat too much healthy food. I’m one of them!

Ah I don't think OP was Sneery

She clearly is for be if the whole family and was testing the water here

OP fuck this thread as people seem to have a cheesy loaded chip on their shoulder on this issue

I think it's good to hear your friends child would eat salmon and vegetables

I would test the water with your friend and look for an opening

It's not rocket science at the end of the day and she might need advice and someone to talk with

Or she might get reallly annoyed you know best ....

I guess an underweight one would be harder to spot...

Overweight is more obvious fat is fat. Whereas underweight/slim perhaps wouldn't be so out the ordinary unless say you saw the rest of the family who were all much bigger built and it woukd loo a bit more strange

It is if course a problem. I guess though a parent would notice a kid wasn't eating nore than slowly noticing the portion size creeping up... if that makes sense

My child of similar age would eat like the op’s friends daughter given the chance. She is healthy, fit and active however and far from overweight. She just has a huge appetite but metabolises quickly. So not all children who eat big portions are obese, unhealthy or greedy! Also, I wonder if the little girl is going to see an early puberty and her body is demanding the extra fuel?

I would be shocked if I saw a child eat that much at 8.

One of my DS's friends has been very overweight since reception. Does it affect his self esteem yes it does. I have had a few conversations with mum on the subject ( she started them not me) . Actually I think the parents in my DS's friend case need to get tough.

It is never an easy subject to raise.

Far too much food.
Poor kid. No wonder it’s fat

I did say I was going to say something you just haven't read it

The thing with the uniform is just a bit more complicated and I don't know it all - she won't wear trousers and the skirt is pleated, there is a bigger size available (I don't know what - I assume that's a 11/12) so it then becomes too big to wear length wise. And you can't take it up (pleats)
Hence she has asked me if I can find the right colour anywhere else.
I don't know what the fit is like but I know there are no plus sizes

Do people just let their children eat as many as they want. Me and DH had issues with our teeth as children and don't want the same for DD. Is that somehow showing off parenting all of a sudden

People do. When they throw it in to a “not judging” thread where they are definitely “not judging” someone and use CAPS to describe a situation which they are so very definitely “not judging” - it’s showing off how superior their parenting skills are

Why does anyone start a thread on mumsnet?

Fuck knows.

I think people are in denial about weight issues and the language used round them is ridiculous, "curvy" no , it's fat
BBW, you may be beautiful but you're still fat
"Fat and healthy" no you're not, fat is not healthy, never and you know it, you're just kidding yourself
"Fat shaming" you should be ashamed letting your child get obese

I'm shocked at some of the responses. If I was OP I would have been shocked too. It's funny how if someone was starving their child and fed them a carrot stick for their lunch everyone would jump in it saying it's child abuse but it's ok to let a child eat themselves to death?

I'm shocked that parents let their children eat this much and actually say 'oh she/he eats reall well', eating no loads of food is not eating well .

Posts like this really bother me. The thing is, how does it affect your life in any way what this girl eats or doesn’t eat? What do posts and comments like these do? How do they help? Potentially trigger eating disorders? Make someone feel bad about themselves? Help you feel validated about your own weight?

Regardless of what someone weighs or chooses to eat, they still deserve respect and basic human decency. Discussing their weight and appetite on a public forum isn’t really the kindest thing to do.

At what point did not wanting your child to eat too much shitty food and get ill become 'superior parenting'?

It is superior parenting in my eyes, and letting your child become obese is inferior parenting

At what point did not wanting your child to eat too much shitty food and get ill become 'superior parenting'?

At the point you post it on the internet when you are definitely “not judging”

Surely it should be normal parenting "toccat*?

Are you saying that there isn't a problem with childhood obesity in the UK "Originalfoolgirl*?