To think this is too much food!

[Rudedog]

So one of DDs friends moved away and they have been home for weekend and today - so we have been out for tea before they travelled home, to TGI Fridays.

So it's me and DD, DDs friend, her mum and younger sister.
Another friend and mother came too.

I've been shocked by DDs friend weight gain over the last year, it's gotten worse and now I can see the cause. She is 8 and this is what she was allowed to order for dinner....

From the adult menu - mozzarella sticks, a half rack of BBQ ribs with fries, a massive brownie ice cream thing for pudding....
She ate all that PLUS - half of her mums onion rings, half of her mums shrimp pasta and a lot of her cheesecake
PLUS - most of her younger sisters chicken fingers and fries and ice cream (younger sister barely eats anyway)
PLUS - she asked about everyone else's dinners and were they eating them all and tried hoovering up any leftovers.

She then asked about getting sweets.

I've never seen an adult eat that much let alone an 8 year old. I can't believe she wasn't sick (they've got a long car journey so maybe I've spoken too soon.

Me and other parent were a bit taken a back, other parent said 'aren't you full yet?' - her mum said 'she's such a good eater and she's always hungry' - she spoke like it was a positive thing.

I never make DD clear a plate - we talk a lot about eating until we feel full.

I mean I'm not unreasonable am I that even if you child is 'hungry' you say no - it's too much food!

DS1 is now too.

There are posts like this on every aspect of parenting as well as every aspect of food and eating.

It could just as well be

AIBU to think it's rude to let your child swear and spit at the elderly? I teach my children to say please and thank you, but a classmate of my child just swears and spits. AIBU to think that's not good manners?

It's not going to improve the general standard of behaviour amoung the yoof to post that, any more than the op will in any way help address the obesity crisis. It's just posted to sneer and self congratulate

@Rudedog ......and this is why we have an obesity crisis! People condone this shizz! She's a kid, she needs to understand she can't have it! 🤔

Some of my DD's friends eat loads of rubbish and are stick thin. My DD is slim but not skinny and eats quite healthily. If she ate what they do she would put on weight. She does bemoan the unfairness.If the girl was skinny would you still comment on here?

I don't know why you shouldn't be concerned about other children's health?
Why is it 'sneary' I've known them both since they were babies - am I not meant to care.

Is it okay to be concerned if she is starving them or again shall I butt out?

I'm in my mid 40s - I still know childhood friends parents who are still concerned how I am doing - I'm worried everyone is just meant to not care and keep their nose out of everyone's business now.

If you’re that concerned get off here talking about them and speak to your friend. Otherwise it’s just snide.

It's just posted to sneer and self congratulate

No it's not, sometimes you need to check in with yourself and others about whether what you're thinking is normal! And in this case it clearly isn't! Let's ignore everything and la la la and sit on fabulous fences so we don't offend poor little snowflakes! By airing this, the OP opens up a debate which quite clearly is split but if OP sees people agreeing with her, she knows people share her views. I share her views. This child eats too much.

Schadenfreude - Prader-Willi Syndrome. I was trying to remember the name. I believe that children with this condition never feel satisfied and do eat leftovers and even non-food items. Food has to be locked away from them. It sounds awful.

It is absolutely abuse , I also wondered how many of the ones having a go have fat kids or are fat themselves
Yes it is disgusting to eat or let your child eat that amount of food
Anyone with an ounce of sense knows that is wrong

That is way too much food. Now, do you have any plans to raise it with her mother?

What's abuse? It's abuse for a child to eat a huge meal? Wtf?

It's not prada willi syndrome FFs

I wonder if she might have 'Prada Willi Syndrome'? Apparantly it can develop in early childhood. Not sure how early though.

Cross posted Steely!

That would keep me going for a week, at least !

Sorry - I meant Bubblepop - it's been a long, hard day.......

Have you raised your horror at this girl's diet with your friend OP?

Are you intending to, or are you just going to froth about it on Mumsnet, because if the latter it's kind of a pointless exercise.

You know it's to much food. On what planet would it not be?

If you'd have started the thread asking advice over how to be help or gently alert the parent to what is clearly a huge problem that's one thing. But I think you just wanted to be mean tbh .

Poor child. All the adults in her life letting her down. Either by over feeding her or by being so rude about her.

Poor child

@MsHarry as I said I am also concerned about her younger sister who eats nothing and is tiny

I think PW is associated with learning difficulties? She has no issues there

I think that's a disgusting amount of food and the mother is setting the daughter up for a lifetime of obesity and diabetes. But oh no- we mustn't say anything for fear of upsetting anyone. Even if a child is eating themselves to death

It's abuse to let your child get so fat she can't fit into school uniform and the associated bullying that will undoubtedly go with that
It's abuse to let your child get so fat that she will more than likely have all the health problems that go along with it

The OP wasn't intending on raising it with her friend, she said:

I mean I'm not unreasonable am I that even if you child is 'hungry' you say no - it's too much food!

but maybe if she sees people agreeing with her, she might?

If it was me, OP, I would have been concerned too. It's hard to know how to broach it though, without offending. That's so much food, and it doesn't do children any good to be overindulged in their greediness. At 8, this is basically what you saw, all this 'some people just eat more' is just nonsense if you've observed the weight gain!

How is it even possible for a little girl to eat ALL that? Most adults would struggle.

Are you embellishing it somewhat OP?

I couldn’t eat that much and I’m a proper fat fucker.

My children (almost 9) wouldn’t manage even half of it either, although they both have healthy appetites. Neither are overweight. I do worry that one has my propensity to overeat unhealthy stuff and moan about veg.

Could it be because they were out?

Maybe it's right I did post on here because it isn't cut and dried

An awful lot of people think it's nothing to do with me (and a non issue).

Mum asked me to help source some uniform for her - I think I will say that maybe it's time to look at what size she is, especially she has 2 more years in primary to get through. If she can't find anything to fit now it's not going to improve.