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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To expect payment for ticket .............

789 replies

Guardsman18 · 03/11/2017 13:08

Help needed please!
Was very close to friend for years. She's rubbish with money but was good at spending mine! We don't see each other so much, but still chat and I went to her birthday bash a few weeks ago.

It took me a while, but the penny finally dropped and I no longer 'lend' her money. (Think 'loan' for £1000 seven years ago and have only had £200 ish back).

There is a band that we have always wanted to see - I know I sound about 10!), so we agreed that I would get the tickets on my card and she would reimburse me after Glastonbury - very expensive!

Here's the thing - tomorrow is the day we go and I think (know?) that she won't have the money.

WIBU to just not go with her? Am meant to be picking her up at 12 pm.

OP posts:
MsJolly · 03/11/2017 15:21

I'd go for option 3 too...

mummmy2017 · 03/11/2017 15:23

don't you have a friend you can ask, who would love to go with you.

Appuskidu · 03/11/2017 15:24

I have met people like her! I'd never have lent them any money though Grin

You are talking about going on the train-how are you proposing to get back? Surely that will answer this question...

I want to cancel the hotel, but if I do that and go, where can I stay then?!

We can't really tell you where you are going to stay!

AnneLovesGilbert · 03/11/2017 15:24

Yes! Exactly that. Her being at a wedding is immaterial, she could have paid you back any day for the last 8 months.

JaneEyre70 · 03/11/2017 15:40

If she doesn't transfer you the money tonight by 8pm, I try and see if another friend/work colleague will go with you. If not, put the tickets on a local FB selling site or Twickets. You'd be an absolute mug to take her if she hasn't paid for it.

manicinsomniac · 03/11/2017 15:40

YANBU

But you're surely going to have to go - either on your own or with someone else - because the hotel will charge you regardless. I would think 24 hours cancellation policy will be the day of arrival (ie by midnight Thursday), not 24 hours before you actually turn up to check in? The room is yours from about 2pm tomorrow, isn't it? Regardless of the time you actually check in.

KeepItAsItIs · 03/11/2017 15:45

Get the train home after, save yourself the hotel money. Tell her her ticket has been sold as she has not paid for it.

I once had a similar situation, friend was desperate to go to the show, but I couldn't get the money off her, or replies in the end. I just messaged her and told her the ticket had been sold to someone else. Tough shit, I've got not time for chancers tbh.

Mulberry72 · 03/11/2017 15:48

We went to see Jamiroquai last night in our home town! Bloody brilliant, you have to go OP!

Original poster
Guardsman18 · 03/11/2017 15:48

Fancy seeing them again Mulberry?!

OP posts:
BewareOfDragons · 03/11/2017 15:51

Your half of the petrol ... hahahahaha ... you really think she's going to kick in on petrol, too?

I'd just tell her you're selling her ticket or taking someone else since she's clearly taking the piss And you'll see her in small claims for our £800 if you don't have it by the end of the month. She can sell her belongings to pay it if she has to.

Original poster
Guardsman18 · 03/11/2017 15:56

I could say all of these things ...... if she'd reply

OP posts:
Appuskidu · 03/11/2017 15:58

How will you get home then if you get the train alone? Is it an expensive hotel?

cakeymccakington · 03/11/2017 15:59

Right.

Then make the decision yourself.

Sort your train ticket and either use the hotel or get train back after the concert.

If she gets the money then great, give her the ticket and let her sort her own transport.

If she doesn't then sell it outside the gig

SarahH12 · 03/11/2017 16:02

Everyone else has said it a lot better than I can but definitely take their advice! And stop being a mug!!

StormTreader · 03/11/2017 16:05

Stop asking for a reply, tell her shes already too late - if she actually wants to go, you can bet youll get a reply quick!

Id be sending something like
"so, I still havent heard from you about tomorrow so I'm assuming youve decided not to go, we should catch up soon though!"
and then book your train ticket.

If she DOES then reply with "no, Im definitely going!" you can say
"oh, I decided to go by train since I thought you werent coming, you can give me the cash for the ticket at the venue if you still want to come but you'll have to make your own way there now".

mickeysminnie · 03/11/2017 16:06

You need to decide whether you want to go or not. If you don't want to go, cancel the hotel. If you do want to go book your train ticket. Send her a message saying you can't drive and are now going by train.

LIZS · 03/11/2017 16:11

A message "Hi, change of plan so now need to go by train. Will be catching the xx from y . If you are still planning to come I'll meet you on the platform, otherwise will see what I can get for the ticket and you can pay me back the difference in cost plus share of hotel. Let me know either way by 8 tonight. " puts it firmly back in her court.

CherieBabySpliffUp · 03/11/2017 16:18

I promise I'm not the friend BUT I think yabu to expect a reply by 8 if she's at a wedding. Won't she be at the evening do? I would be surprised if you get a reply today.
Saying that I think you have given her ample opportunity to reply before now so I would be going without her.

Pancakeflipper · 03/11/2017 16:19

Phone her.

Pancakeflipper · 03/11/2017 16:19

oops don't she's at wedding (missed that).

Candlelight234 · 03/11/2017 16:26

Go on your own, don't miss out because of your friend! Stay in the hotel and use the hotel room.

BrokenBattleDroid · 03/11/2017 16:30

OP I don't think you are being unreasonable with any of this, EXCEPT that you have left this until today, knowing she is at a wedding. I wouldn't keep my phone on me at a wedding and probably wouldn't check it until the following day, plus I would have no way to do a bank transfer from the venue in the evening. This should have been yesterday's task, plus you don't know (other than a very valid suspicion based on past experiences) that she doesn't have the cash waiting for you.

You've text her already. My next move would be to ring her before you leave tomorrow to check she has the cash ready for you, plus enough for any food etc. If she doesn't, then say sorry she can't come. Then go alone and sell the ticket outside.

talkshowhost97 · 03/11/2017 16:30

You've had some brilliant advice on this thread. All I can add is definitely still go. I saw Jamiroquai live in the late 90s and early 00s and wish I was closer to you as would jump at the chance to go! Do not let her go without paying. You would def sell that ticket online or outside no problem. Or offer it free or half price to a non-CF friend rather than letting her take the piss out of you.

VeganIan · 03/11/2017 16:34

Send StormTreader's message. You'll have a brilliant time going on your own - reading on the train, sell your spare ticket outside and starfish in your hotel room all by yourself or not The hotel and meal will still be cheaper if you are only paying for yourself Grin

LoniceraJaponica · 03/11/2017 16:39

"sell your spare ticket outside"

Do people really turn up to gigs without a ticket in the hope that someone turns up with spares?

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