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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To expect payment for ticket .............

789 replies

Guardsman18 · 03/11/2017 13:08

Help needed please!
Was very close to friend for years. She's rubbish with money but was good at spending mine! We don't see each other so much, but still chat and I went to her birthday bash a few weeks ago.

It took me a while, but the penny finally dropped and I no longer 'lend' her money. (Think 'loan' for £1000 seven years ago and have only had £200 ish back).

There is a band that we have always wanted to see - I know I sound about 10!), so we agreed that I would get the tickets on my card and she would reimburse me after Glastonbury - very expensive!

Here's the thing - tomorrow is the day we go and I think (know?) that she won't have the money.

WIBU to just not go with her? Am meant to be picking her up at 12 pm.

OP posts:
Original poster
Guardsman18 · 04/11/2017 10:53

I said I'd keep you updated - just had a message as she's just woken up and was very drunk yesterday apparently (wedding). No mention of trip.

i will wait until 12, if we go great otherwise I'll get a train about 2 ish.
I'll be back!

OP posts:
LondonStill83 · 04/11/2017 10:54

In a way I hope she does flake out as I genuinely think you will have a better time alone!

Lulusmother · 04/11/2017 10:57

TBH I'd go on the train anyway. I've been to Birmingham for concerts before and it's a nightmare getting to the Barclay Card Arena plus horrendous trying to get out the car park. Took us an hour once!!!

Puzzledandpissedoff · 04/11/2017 10:57

Thoroughly confused now ... are you going to not answer her until 12 in the hope she'll somehow mention the money?

Original poster
Guardsman18 · 04/11/2017 10:58

Good tip Lulus. Thanks. I don't even know if I go to New street or the other one!

OP posts:
dustarr73 · 04/11/2017 10:58

Go on your own and small claim her for the 800

EB123 · 04/11/2017 10:59

I pull reply, saying 'sounds like you had a good night then. Did you manage to sort the money for tonight? I am setting off for the train at 12

EB123 · 04/11/2017 10:59

Would reply* no idea where pull came from?!

Original poster
Guardsman18 · 04/11/2017 11:01

Don't mean to sound confusing - sorry if I am!

I am assuming that we are going, she has money to pay so off we toddle as planned. If she doesn't have money, I'm getting the train.

OP posts:
expatinscotland · 04/11/2017 11:01

I'd small claim her arse for that 800 if she signed anything. I predict she'll turn up empty handed and expect you to sub her.

Badweekjustgotworse · 04/11/2017 11:02

Hey op,
Just read your thread, sack her off and go without definitely sounds like the best plan of action. You'll have way more fun than having to lug her around if she's sulking and feel like your walking on eggshells every time there's something to pay for.

Write off all debts and walk away, friends don't treat friends like she's treating you!

Enjoy the gig, sounds ace

Appuskidu · 04/11/2017 11:02

Assumption is the mother of all fuck ups, OP!

Good luck

Lulusmother · 04/11/2017 11:08

I'd go to New Street and get a taxi there. I'd guess you could walk it but I'd have to GPS it and I'm rubbish at that on my own! Least you'd be there and sorted = no stress 👏🏻

Puzzledandpissedoff · 04/11/2017 11:09

I am assuming that we are going, she has money to pay so off we toddle as planned. If she doesn't have money, I'm getting the train

Then can I suggest - gently - that you think about how you're going to handle it if you say you're going alone and she gets nasty? I think we all know the chances of her paying a full contribution are minuscule, and I can't quite see someone like this taking it well if she's thwarted

It's just that everyone wants you to have a lovely day, and it might put a damper on things if you're seething over some unpleasantness she creates ...

WhataHexIgotinto · 04/11/2017 11:10

Don't you think it's probably best not to 'assume' anything with this particular woman?

LIZS · 04/11/2017 11:11

Why are you giving her 2 hours leeway? Get a train at 12.

debbs77 · 04/11/2017 11:13

She won't stop using you in this way OP

witchofzog · 04/11/2017 11:15

I think she probably won't let on she has no money until you are face to face which will put you in a very difficult position. If I were you I would consider what to do in this situation too. Are you still going to go without her in this situation?

Original poster
Guardsman18 · 04/11/2017 11:15

I'n not giving her leeway. I don't want to go at 12! I just agreed because I knew she wouldn't be ready and we'd go when I wanted to which is 2 pm

OP posts:
Happyemoji · 04/11/2017 11:18

It sounds like you just wanted to vent and nothing is going to change. What will it take for you to see she is sponging of you and you're not getting nothing back in return.

Original poster
Guardsman18 · 04/11/2017 11:18

This is why I came on here yesterday tbh. Loads of good advice. Covered all angles. I need to go to cashpoint so if she doesn't have any money, I'm going alone.
Am off for a shower now

OP posts:
searose · 04/11/2017 11:19

Just read this thread ... the suspense!

Stormzy · 04/11/2017 11:20

Have a good time op!

Placemarking

PurplePillowCase · 04/11/2017 11:20

if she's pissed off at you anyway you don't have anything to lose by pursuing for the 800£ through small claims...

WhataHexIgotinto · 04/11/2017 11:20

If I were you I'd be suggesting going to the cashpoint after you meet up so that you can get your own money out and let her get the money out for you. If she doesn't have it, I'd be leaving her there.