To think I don't need permission from dh to diet

[Jesstheblackandwhitecat]

Or do I?

I want to do a very low calorie diet - shakes and soups.

Dh has said no as he is worried that seeing me not eating will affect the children (they are already poor eaters)

I can't work out inches being an arse or not ...

OP read the low carb high fat section on the diet boards here. It works and you will not feel like you are dieting. Your kids will see you eating proper food.

Low carb and high fat diet has worked for me to and I highly recommend it.

My BF did the Lighter Life diet and lost 4 stones. She looked gaunt and unwell. 18 months later she's put on 5 stones and I've suggested she tries LCHF. I've lost 19lbs on it, over 10 weeks and it's a total revelation! I've done just about every one going and for the first time I've found one that not only works but that has switched off my sweet tooth!

Sugar shake diets are appalling. And always fail.

Show your kids a good attitude to food by eating normal food in normal portions and never talking about diets. Your husband is right.

Look at the post above mine - lighter life, total failure. They always are. That's horrendous yo yo weight too.

How much weight do you have to lose, OP? Is it Cambridge or LighterLife or something like that? It's tempting to think that once you are slim you will magically have the willpower to stick to the diet, but the truth is that it's not that easy. A VLC diet will not teach you anything about good eating habits- it will merely teach you to avoid food. I would be very cautious because nearly everyone who follows these diets puts the weight back on and often more than they lost.

In my experience, the only thing that works is to stop eating processed food, do healthy home cooking, forget about the diet thing and then in the meantime the weight will come off. It's easier said than done. I have struggled with disordered eating for a long time and although I am not currently overweight, I am not sure whether I will ever have a 'normal' relationship with food.

If you are an emotional eater then diets that focus on the food are doomed to failure.

Have you tried hypnotherapy? I am an emotional eater, mostly under control with the help of hypnotherapy. In times of great stress I sometimes revert to old habits but I can bring myself back by listening to hypnotherapy tracks like this for a few days:

www.hypnosisdownloads.com/weight-loss/emotional-eating

OP get ‘if you want to loose weight try a kick up the arse’

It’s by Julie someone it’s amaxing.

Soups and shakes work short time but if you really want to stay slim you need a constant low carb high protein diet and sack off the cakes and treats.

You need a regular challenging exercise programme too. Find what you like to do, running, cycling, tennis etc and do it regularly to sweat point.

If you really want to
Loose weight you will. It’s hard but worth it.

Do you have a friend or relative you could start a bit of a healthy eating group chat with? Myself, MIL and two friends have a group chat on WhatsApp where we encourage eachother, put photos on of our meals to give ideas etc and to have a bit of a moan if we’ve dropped off the bandwagon for an evening etc. It really helps me!

All diets boil down to calorie deficit. This to me was the key. Instead of needing a plan or to follow a guide, just track my calories and ensure I ate at a deficit. If following one keeps you on track great but it has to be sustainable, the minute I have a bad day and eat something off plan will it derail you and make you want to give up.

Weight loss only is possible when u want it because it takes motivation and control to stick to, to make things become second nature

Your dh has a point because your children will be watching and absorbing your relationship with food especially when you say you can’t eat this and that, by sticking to calories and being mindful nothing is off limits, you can have an ice cream on a hot day or pizza on a Friday night you just have to plan it to fit your calories, consider calories an average over a week not just per day that way you can eat less on certain days to allow for treats on others

Also start your diet after your period has ended, hormones will be on your side and help you stick to it more 😃

OP I am/have been in a similar situation. Had an ED as a teenager. Now been overweight since my early 20s. It is really hard to lose weight when you've got a history of ED as it is can be triggering and stressful.

Quite a few years ago, I put on even more weight after developing an underactive thyroid. After trying all sorts of ways to lose weight, I lost a couple of stones doing low carb vegetarian (I am vege anyway). I maintained it for years but doing low carb some days, but not every day.

I put on some weight after having dd (too many mums groups with cake plus eating more due to exhaustion). I lost it again with doing a couple of 5:2 days a week. Again maintained the last couple of years and still am.

Have a read of Dr Michael Mosley Blood Sugar Diet. He suggests doing very low calorie for several weeks. He presents evidence that doing a low VLCD diet can work. But of course you need to eat healthily afterwards. His book is packed full of scientific evidence.

I really, really wish I could have an uncomplicated relationship with food. I am trying to lose a bit more weight now. Due to my ED history, it's making it even more stressful.

While I agree you don’t need your husband’s permission to diet, I agree you do need to think very carefully about the impact you have on your children.

I was very overweight this time last year. I realised that not only was I eating rubbish but DD (4) wanted to share all I ate. So I joined SW, we’ve never talked about ‘dieting’, I refer to it as ‘healthy eating club’. I started doing a healthy eating sticker chart with the premise that I got stickers for doing well at healthy eating club and she could too. She was a very fussy eater, only wanted to eat processed food, refused most fruit and veg. She agreed to try ‘healthy’ foods in return for stickers. Now she eats a really wide range of food and lots of fruit and veg. I hit target in June and eat very differently now too. I do find hypnosis helps - I use Paul Mckenna’s I can make you thin and gastric band to go to sleep with.

I do think it’s about making healthy choices to aide weight loss and set a good example to DCs wherever possible.

*Gobster
*
Love the graph 😍

Thanks for your thoughts.

I know logically I would be able to eat healthily and lose weight, but in all honesty i struggle to do so when overweight (I know logically this makes no sense but I guess disordered eating doesn't make sense.)

I am going to do Cambridge until I get to a weight I feel comfortable with and I know I will find it so much easier to maintain then. I'm starting Tuesday 1st November.

Dh is being a bit annoying but has said he'll support me.

Jesstheblackandwhitecat

Be very careful with Cwp. Trust me. I know what I'm talking about. I lost 7 stone on this and my friend lost 10 stone, both within a year.

Started coming of the and going up the steps a little. Food was just amazing after so long of being so strict it was like the flood gates opened! I gained all the weight back plus 1.5 stone and my friend has put back on at least half of her weight.

I ended up going back to sw and am steadily loosing what I put back on and don't feel deprived so is much easier to stick too.

My main issue with CWP is you lose the weight so fast it distorts your view of obtainable weight loss. I still think 5-6lbs per week is normal and am gutted when I have only lost 2 even though this is the reccomended amount.

Good luck if you decide to try it, my number one warning is don't go on and off, on and off. They say your first chance is your best chance and I can only agree with this. With all the will in the world I couldn't go back and stick to that plan a second time!

I know exactly what you mean, although I tend to lose more like 3/4 lbs a week.

I did it after having Dc1 and lost 3 stone. I have put it back but to be fair it took years and it's my fault not the diets!

Completely understand it's not the diet, however it is very very restrictive (as you will know)

The problem is you say it was your fault, and I agree mine was my fault etc however everyone I know who has done it says the exact same thing.

Just be careful, follow the steps properly I'm not trying to tell you what to do, more just hope my experience can help others from not doing the same thing (negative into a positive sort of way)

Thanks @DaisyRaine90 😃

It’s all over Instagram and various fitness sites, but the logic of it means I don’t get hung up on eating a certain way

If I want to eat my entire days calories in biscuits I can and still lose weight, probably wouldn’t recommend it but it’s possible 😃

May i suggest that you fuck the diets off, and take a look at the rebelfit Facebook page to explain why you end up fatter after any kind of diet.

He's right.

And those diets are trash and will have either no impact, or a negative impact in the long-term.

Don't do any fad diet - none of them work. Work out the calorie requirements to MAINTAIN the weight you (realistically) want to be and eat that, forever. Incorporate exercise and you can eat whatever you burn. Any restrictive diet is bloody miserable.

Well but restricting your calories is a restrictive diet!

Also, focus on health gain, not weight loss. Weight loss diets are all shit one way or another. And they do not work!!!

But the point is that the maintaince calories for your goal weight is what you have to eat to stay that weight long term. There is no point doing a crash diet and then eating whatever the hell you want once you reach goal.

But I'm not ... honestly, it must sound like I'm just being annoying but I cannot eat healthily when overweight, I am rubbish.