To want to get my entire boob out and breastfeed whilst wearing pyjamas to breakfast in a hotel.

[SmileEachDay]

Just...the JUDGEMENT.

Make sure boob muncher's toenails are painted, and that you have a tattoo of all your children's birth coordinates in Latin on your arm.

Please can someone actually do all of the above?

Don't forget, natural weaning is the way to feed these days. Just don't forget to chew those onion ring crisps thoroughly before you spit them into bubba's gob.

Bloody gives up waiting for someone to post something I can reply "comparison is the thief of joy" too. Cos just saying it makes you look like the Dalai Lama y'know.
7% battery, damn. It's been fun.

You're all a bunch of FUCKING, FUCKING CUNTS and if you were my friends or family I'd immediately block you from every social media platform, cut you out of my life and feed any cards or gifts you bought my children to the dog.

(lighthearted)

"Bloody gives up waiting for someone to post something I can reply "comparison is the thief of joy" too."

My jugs are smaller than the OP's.

and I've only got a 2 cup teapot double sadface

I sense a huge back story with the OP

"I sense a huge back story with the OP"

Yep. Probably a TW wots had of them mammry gland transplants. They can do them now, you know. I read about it in the Daily Sport. Fucking amazing what scientists can do these days.

I think BAREFOOT is beyond the pale. You should at least be wearing Ugg Boots or possibly some nice moon boots in case it gets cold.

However key point OP - you have omitted to tell us what you are eating between puffs, sucks and sips.

In fact what are you sipping?

ITWSBT.

If I was related to you, I'd definitely be going NC

Tell all the other guests 'it's okay I'm just titting him off'.

Eat plenty of beans beforehand, so you can fart loudly throughout

Would Coriander like to come to my Chlamydia's 6th birthday party? Siblings welcome too, so long as there's no more than eight per invitee. and they all bring a present each

Coriander would be delighted to attend Chlamydia's party, but I'm busy doing posh things, so I'll send the nanny. Are you providing champagne?

Is this a reverse? Massive drop feed for fucks sake.
I can't read this, try some paragraphs.
OP is all your clothing washed twice a day and tumble dried? Anything less is filthy.

Would Coriander like to come to my Chlamydia's 6th birthday party?

Do you not even care? Chlamydia is 72 months old. You monster.

In fact, what are you sipping? A can of Red Bull fits nicely into a dressing gown pocket.

Are you providing champagne?

For the nanny to bring home to you?

I would suggest you fully unbutton your pyjama shirt to allow free access to both the baby and the 4 year old. Extra points for boobing hands free. Bubz in a wrap sling (but low lying for maximum exposure) and the toddler can lie across the table when he wants a bit of boob juice.

Regular poster. Think Mexican house thief, cake mum. Name changed as this could be outing.

You should be sampling some MN glue of course while exclusively boob juice feeding and performance patenting to the max with the toddler.
By the way over the internet I can unhelpfully criticise your patenting and then diagnose the toddler with ADHD, aspergers, autism etc. HTH hun.

I'd also say that after their deadbeat dad dared to hold the door open for an elderly lady, that you need to LTB. He's obviously gaslighting and is cheating with said lady.

Oh and most importantly, when you get home from the hotel and are washing your pyjamas, don't forget to never ever dry them outside overnight. Wouldn't want them getting darked on

Remember the good old days when all you had to do to prove you were a MNer was to wear a jaunty scarf just so? Nowadays, you have to get your tits out over your scrambled eggs in your local Holiday Inn. I miss my scarf...

This brightened up my dark morning, especially the two biscuits.

Quick get the potty out - the 6 year old needs a poo!