To wonder why you wouldn't make a small effort to cover up whilst feeding?

[BonkToTheFinish]

Not in your own home or whatever else that is within comfort zone for you.

I’m talking restraunts, places to eat etc etc

I don’t really understand it. A good friend of mine liked a picture that I came across today titled “Not even trying to cover up in public anymore, most natural thing ever 👌❤️”

Picture is of said woman in a bit swankier than average place to eat, boob completely out without thought and baby isn’t covering it at all really.

You do NOT NOT NOT have to cover a baby’s head to be discrete. You don’t even have to wear specialist clothing, it’s very easy to be discrete without having to have the whole breast completely on show.

I wouldn’t just feed DS with a whole boob out, it isn’t necessary and although BF is natural, some people do feel uncomfortable about breasts and aren’t comfortable seeing one completely on show - It doesn’t mean they’d say anything and that’s because they’re polite.

Is it really necessary to have whole boob out like that? AIBU?

I can’t say I’ve seen many people doing it, SIL was feeding her newborn DS a few weeks back and I was shocked she was feeding. I couldn’t actually tell, and baby has a small latch issue.

I’ve only ever seen one other person in public being a bit too in your face about it. She had the whole thing out and wasn’t too bothered regarding her DC being on there etc. She had it out before he was even out of the pram from waking up. The breast was directing me in life, so it seemed, by its swinging

Silverbell the point is that there is no need to be discreet

You don't need to drape a "muzzy" over your chest if you are wearing a low cut top though. Why does exactly the same bit of flesh need to be covered just because your nipple is in a baby's mouth rather than in your top?

I'm not even engaging with silverbell because they either haven't read the thread or are acting like it didn't happen. Do keep up dear.

The thing that gets me is that society looks at two people.

One a brand new mum, exhausted, physically recovering, struggling with the huge responsibility of keeping a baby alive, coping with an unpredictable post partum body.

And the other the equivalent of wow's husband. Comfortable, well cared for, no major life changing events to deal with.

And society decrees (as evidenced by many in this thread) that she should be showing consideration for him. Poor diddums might be ever so slightly embarrassed.

Ffs. It would be funny if it wasn't so damn depressing.

I never owned a muzzy

Coukdnt cooe with attempting to drap and feed a baby who didnt want to be draped

I blame grandparents playing peek a boo for that one

I’m totally with u op! As a current breast feeder and my tally is nearly 3 years of feeding all my kids, it is only polite to be descreet in public for those that find it uncomfortable. No need to cover baby or feed in the loo but also no need to wop the whole thing out.
Weeing and pooing is also the most natural thing in the world but I don’t want it in my face!!!

Fucks sake

couldn't cope

I swear these keys are too close together

For any new mothers reading this, don't stress about trying to be discreet to the satisfaction of strangers with hang ups about breasts! Feed however you need to, to be comfortable and for your baby to be comfortable. Please don't feel intimidated or worried about feeding in public.

People who insist on their own arbitrary definition of "discreet" who would judge women for not meeting it, should be ashamed of themselves.

You've hit the nail on the head Laurie

And I mentioned it ages ago

But i have never seen anyone with their whole boob out

If I were ever in charge of the country I would make it a crime to compare breastfeeding to urinating/defecating. It's offensive, idiotic and utterly thoughtless to do so.

I was a very indiscreet breastfeeder, I can't even be bothered to list my reasons, they're not important. DC2 used to come off, make eye contact with a random stranger then latch back on. I used to regularly breastfeed in a sling, forget to tuck it away and take the sling off. Ahhh, memories.

When I breastfeed I like to get the whole boob out as I'm after all your husbands

jostled to get Laurie' s autograph and a selfie together

Weeing and pooing is also the most natural thing in the world but I don’t want it in my face!!!

Wee and pooing isn't the same as breastfeeding. Eating a meal is the same as breastfeeding. Don't make ridiculous arguments as they just make you look stupid.

platy

No need to get your boob out...you can have my husband!!

Im with natural things still being discreet. Not everyone is a breast feeding mother in a cafe. These arguments are over the top and stupid. If out in public then cover up when getting your tatas out for whatever reason.

You see, if the woman in the cafe had been doing this, while balanced on a table in the cafe window, then possibly the OP might have a point.

Was that what was going on? I think we can say with certainty that it was not.

I suspect what was actually going on - both with the OP, and with all her supporters who don't want tits out in front of their awfully sensitive husbands, or who get a fit of the vapours at a glimpse of nipple as an inquisitive 6 month old unlatches because the world is so interesting - is that the issue lies entirely in the eye of the beholder. Some people just don't like BF. They try to dress it up in terms of "well, if it was done discreetly with a certain type of top/muslin/portable tent/in the loo with the shit splattered walls, I'd be fine with it..." but actually they just don't like BF. They do, however, like goady-fuckery. A lot.

Insofar as anyone has been willing to explain with any precision what they don't think bf women should do, the list is as follows:

• Sit in a cafe with a breast out for 5-10 minutes while baby sleeps in pram

• aggressively say "I'll feed where I like so fuck you" to innocent passers-by

• wave their breasts in someone's face

I've probably missed some but all in all I've rarely seen a more buxom collection of straw men

What on earth is that picture and why on earth would you post it. Some people are just so argumentative and weird.

The word "muzzy" gives me the absolute rage, and the constructive thing I was about to say has flown right out of my head. I'll try to cobble together roughly what I wanted to say.
I've never seen anyone deliberately flashing their breasts while feeding a baby. Never. The women I know who have breastfed were always more concerned with just making the baby stop crying to care. With my first baby I worried about showing too much flesh, partly because of some of the frankly shitty attitudes I came up against, but by the 4th I couldn't have cared less.
I also think that it might be possible to see the whole breast while a mother is feeding her child, but the chances are you'd have to try really hard. That probably says more about the viewer than anyone else.

Im with natural things still being discreet. Not everyone is a breast feeding mother in a cafe. These arguments are over the top and stupid. If out in public then cover up when getting your tatas out for whatever reason.

You keep going on about being 'discreet' but you've not once said when BF is no longer discreet. For the final time, what needs to be on show for it to no longer be discreet? Flesh on top of bosom (I got that impression when you said 'cover it up)? Side boob? Babies head hovering near the breast? What exactly?

Why does it give you rage? I never knew one existing when i had kids, we didn't have them, aren't they a middle class thing?

It's called a reductio ad absurdum. I posted it in order to poke fun at the ridiculously judgy brigade on here. Sometimes (see Swift's modest proposal) satire is the only appropriate response to extreme stupidity.

Weird. very weird.

How in earth are they a middle class things

I never had one...just didnt have one

And some of the 'discrete' feeding posts are over the top and stupid

I dont know where all these topless women are...ive never seen one