To wonder why you wouldn't make a small effort to cover up whilst feeding?

[BonkToTheFinish]

Not in your own home or whatever else that is within comfort zone for you.

I’m talking restraunts, places to eat etc etc

I don’t really understand it. A good friend of mine liked a picture that I came across today titled “Not even trying to cover up in public anymore, most natural thing ever 👌❤️”

Picture is of said woman in a bit swankier than average place to eat, boob completely out without thought and baby isn’t covering it at all really.

You do NOT NOT NOT have to cover a baby’s head to be discrete. You don’t even have to wear specialist clothing, it’s very easy to be discrete without having to have the whole breast completely on show.

I wouldn’t just feed DS with a whole boob out, it isn’t necessary and although BF is natural, some people do feel uncomfortable about breasts and aren’t comfortable seeing one completely on show - It doesn’t mean they’d say anything and that’s because they’re polite.

Is it really necessary to have whole boob out like that? AIBU?

I can’t say I’ve seen many people doing it, SIL was feeding her newborn DS a few weeks back and I was shocked she was feeding. I couldn’t actually tell, and baby has a small latch issue.

I’ve only ever seen one other person in public being a bit too in your face about it. She had the whole thing out and wasn’t too bothered regarding her DC being on there etc. She had it out before he was even out of the pram from waking up. The breast was directing me in life, so it seemed, by its swinging

Icanhearmynebioursshouting
I know what you mean

I think there is a big difference between women feeding babies just getting on with it and feeling comfortable and people who turn their feeding choices into a look at me statement.

Anyone who is offended seeing a breast being used to feed needs their head examining. Breast feeding is a normal and natural way to feed babies.

Equally, i have no time for people who like to make a big deal of their feeding choice (e.g. people on my facebook feed who upload weekly photos of their boob with baby latched onto their nipple. Yes breastfreeding is good. No, you don't need to upload 40000 photos of your boobs to draw attention to how you feed your baby).

Now, what is offensive is calling restaurants "restraunts". Not sure how you're even managing to post that without it being autocorrected.

@RavingRoo i am not feeding her under a blanket.
I don't want to. She doesn't want to.

We feed perfectly effectively for us.
And that is all that matters.

OP a shawl or cover is a good option.

If you give me your address I can send you one. You can use it over your head if breastfeeding causes you offence.

I first breast fed years ago and there was barely a muslin cloth or special breastfeeding cover up in sight. They are just another thing to shame women and make money out of new mums. To the smug mother who breastfed for 13 months with a muslin cloth - I am amazed at your attitude. We should be encouraging women to bf not shaming them. The world is really going backwards

Ravingroo, I can safely say that I have never seen a toddler feeding under a blanket, and I certainly never taught my children to do so.

RavingRoo . All the other women I know who bf toddlers have taught them how to do it under a blanket.

Now you have really cheered me up.

It's such an essential life skill to be able to have a snack under a blanket.

No mumma, it’s really not anyone’s attitude that drove how I chose to feed my child. It was my desire for privacy, my personal preference. My choice. Everyone has a choice.

Welwyn, I think what people struggle with is why you would choose to feed your baby in a toilet with all the disadvantages I referred to above.

People suggesting a shawl or a cover, why?

If a woman wants to use a scarf or shawl for their OWN comfort then that's fine.
It's not ok for people to suggest women SHOULD use a cover becauee people get offended by boobs.

Well if you don’t want to teach your toddler kids how not to expose you in public that’s your problem. I think there’s an element of ‘look at me’ when women encourage their toddlers to pop their boob out whenever required.

Ceto I was in a passport office in the height of holiday season getting my 2 week olds passport. Nowhere to sit, place rammed. Partner stayed in the queue while I went to another floor and fed my baby in the cool of the ladies loo. Really not a problem.

@RavingRoo How is it a me problem?
I'm perfectly fine and happy.
A problem means that there is something wrong. And as I'm not doing anything wrong. I have no problem.

I don't want people to look at me. But I don't care if they do.

When you've answered the door to a postman with a whole boob hanging out you sort of lose a lot of 'care'

Welwyn I’d love to know where you live that has all these ‘spotless’ public toilets in convenient places.

RavingRoo it's great that we have people like you. Defenders of public morality.

You win my gold star.

People shit in toilets.

People also don't wash their hands.

That toilet was not spotless.

Coffee, I did it twice during 6m of breastfeeding.

@Welwyncitydweller
Yes is a choice but one you have made based on pressures from society for women to be discreet when feeding their child and that is the problem.
Your desire for privacy is a byproduct of the negative attitudes towards women and women that breastfeed.
Maybe you don't even realise that's why you do it and why you feel like that? But it certainly isn't because your think feeding your child in the bathroom is the cleanest safest most natural thing to do.

@MaisyPops would you be equally offended with photographs showing a baby having a bottle? If not, ask yourself why.

So if I point out that some people are probably made uncomfortable by the sight of your uncovered hair, would you breast-covering people agree to wear a headscarf on that basis?

THIS!

Someone should point that out to Nigel Farage next time he mentions 'ostentatious breastfeeding'.

Honestly, I am not a lentil weaving earth mother, I barely breastfed for a few weeks. But for gods sake, if people are offended by breastfeeding, then truly we are fucked as a society. Seriously, who cares?

Oh mumma you’ve made me laugh. Really, no. You’re wrong.

@RavingRoo
I think you might mistake 'look at me' for 'not giving a shit'

I think I missed this but about how to cover up a sweaty child in summer without them kicking off about at my local breastfeeding support group

@Tw1nsetAndPearls best comment by far 😂

Clearly the OP is not large-breasted (hard to position nipple in breastfeeding baby's mouth without actually looking at it) or the mother of a baby who quite reasonably objects to being stuck under a piece of cloth. Eye contact is an important part of the mother-baby relationship.

Also, would you want to eat your meals under a portable tent to avoid offending the eyes of people who didn't want to see you chewing? Thought not.

YABU.

Welwyn I’d love to know where you live that has all these ‘spotless’ public toilets in convenient places.

Um, I would have thought the clue was in the name! To be fair, the bogs in the John Lewis in town are vair nice.