To wonder why you wouldn't make a small effort to cover up whilst feeding?

[BonkToTheFinish]

Not in your own home or whatever else that is within comfort zone for you.

I’m talking restraunts, places to eat etc etc

I don’t really understand it. A good friend of mine liked a picture that I came across today titled “Not even trying to cover up in public anymore, most natural thing ever 👌❤️”

Picture is of said woman in a bit swankier than average place to eat, boob completely out without thought and baby isn’t covering it at all really.

You do NOT NOT NOT have to cover a baby’s head to be discrete. You don’t even have to wear specialist clothing, it’s very easy to be discrete without having to have the whole breast completely on show.

I wouldn’t just feed DS with a whole boob out, it isn’t necessary and although BF is natural, some people do feel uncomfortable about breasts and aren’t comfortable seeing one completely on show - It doesn’t mean they’d say anything and that’s because they’re polite.

Is it really necessary to have whole boob out like that? AIBU?

I can’t say I’ve seen many people doing it, SIL was feeding her newborn DS a few weeks back and I was shocked she was feeding. I couldn’t actually tell, and baby has a small latch issue.

I’ve only ever seen one other person in public being a bit too in your face about it. She had the whole thing out and wasn’t too bothered regarding her DC being on there etc. She had it out before he was even out of the pram from waking up. The breast was directing me in life, so it seemed, by its swinging

It's like get on with it, I don't give a toss.

It looks like you do give a toss.

Are women actually shoving their boobs in your face?. That would be annoying

I sometimes expose my whole breast, they are huge and to get a good latch I have to hold baby with one hand and use the other to make a breast sandwich so that my baby can get close enough to get a good latch. Once she is happy and I am comfortable and I have checked that my older child is still okay I then try to make sure I am as covered as practical. Sometimes I have a lot of flesh on show for several minutes. I have never had a negative comment. I think it is important for women who feel comfortable feeding in public to do so in order to normalise breasts fulfilling their main function.

m.youtube.com/watch?v=-dw2XHMUnyE

Can't believe no one has posted this yet. I hope the link works.

“I personally do not want be confronted by a huge blue veined boob while I'm trying to eat my toasted tea cake in a cafe.”

I’m so sick of huge blue-veined boobs confronting me! So bloody argumentative!!

I can’t have DC so have never breast-fed. I can’t imagine finding women feeding their children ‘offensive’ in any way, regardless of the percentage of breast that’s visible.

I’ve managed to pick up napkins, offer water and get the attention of waiters for breastfeeding women, without combusting with horror.

Babies are gorgeous. Babies feeding are doing exactly what they’re meant to do. Mothers feeding their kids are doing a necessary job in the face of some fucking weird attitudes, going by this thread.

I always breastfed completely naked other than some Perspex stripper heels and a nipple tassel on the unused boob. I did so in the hope that I could seduce other women's husbands, feeding my baby was just a by product really.

Did it work?

Reading this has made me realise how much I pander to people like the OP.

If I’m wearing a wrap dress I’ll make sure I wear a vest or bandeau underneath that I can push up to cover part of my boob - incidentally the part that’s normally uncovered when I’m not feeding!

I’m really not bothered with people seeing my boob as I’m getting a latch/just finished etc so why do I care that they can see the top of my breast when I’m feeding?

Because dicks like the 10% of posters on here make such a big fucking deal about it that I want to be seen as someone who is making an effort to be discreet.

I resent that hugely!!!

My attitude is - hey stranger, your choice:

1. me silently breastfeeding my baby with a bit of breast showing, or

1. my baby wailing and screaming because she won't allow me to use a cover and is hungry

After about 3 months my child refused to be covered. And yes there were times when she popped off unexpectedly and I flashed a breast. Screw you for caring and grow up.

And people wonder why bf rates in the UK are so bad...

If all of you (women) feel comfortable whining about other women on here and have no concerns about broadcasting your appalling negative attitudes towards bf and bf’ing mothers on a site aimed at parents, I shudder to think what the general population make of bf’ing.

I bf but never blinked at anyone either bf’ing or bottle feeding because I don’t care about other people’s lives or choices.

SHAME ON YOU OP. And the rest of you. Get a fucking life.

OP and others I do wonder where you learned your apparent phobias of ‘ugly’ ‘big’ ‘veiny’ breastfeeding breasts because it is only possible that your attitudes are learnt due to being raised in a misogynistic culture. Literally nobody ever was born thinking the way you do. Babies (the intended audience) - as opposed to weird gawkers such as yourselves- love breastfeeding breasts and think they are the best and presumably most appealing things ever.

So perhaps you should stop leaving the house if all this bothers you so much?.
You really shouldn’t be out looking at women’s functioning breasts for the sake of your own sensibilities if they are soooo difficult for you to know about.
Because I’m sure you’d be the first to complain about having awful noisy crying hungry unfed babies in public spaces too?

So what are mothers supposed to do? Oh I see- you think they could bottle feed? Or just stay at home- and only then they can feed the baby however they want?

That’s the real choice in your hugely entitled opinion: You think you deserve the right to tell all mothers: where, when, by what means, and using what substance, and at what money, resources, time and convenience cost to themselves and the wider family..... they can feed their own hungry babies?

Surely you can see that is a completely fucking batshit thing to demand.
Who gave you the right to create your own personal ticket prices of letting women enter into public spaces..?

Furthermore I am really reluctant to feed your deluded sense of entitlement and power (because no doubt you well know already exactly how shit and stressed and defensive your type of attitudes will be making some women feel next time they need to feed their baby when they’re out).
But: another reason you’re being completely unreasonable is that people with weird intrusive attitudes like yours, and the fear of what they might do or say, already add a lot of unnecessary stress for mothers who just want to feed their baby and get on with their day. That’s just not a tax that women, babies or families should have to pay. That’s why there are laws protecting breastfeeding.

As Pregosaurus just said, you seriously need to get a fucking life.

OP, I think you're uneducated. You're clearly lacking in the intelligence department

I’m not a mum, I couldn’t give a fuck about breastfeeding in public, get the whole boob out if you want! Maybe even two! It registers so low on my ‘give a fuck’ meter.

Those who have an issue with it- says a lot more about them than it does the mum feeding her baby.

This is SOOOOOOOOO infuriating. It's about 'some people feel uncomfortable'. That is THEIR problem, the mother and baby have enough to worry/ think about without having to worry that someone may catch a glimpse of a boob and feel uncomfortable.

If you don't like it don't look. It's YOUR problem. Babies like to snuggle up to boob and feel love etc when feeding. Piss off all those who try to get mothers to feel 'uncomfortable' when feeding.

Yes my comment was serious. My baby had no idea he was in a toilet, which was in fact spotless or I wouldn’t have set foot in there for any purpose. I was able to feed my baby out of sight on many occasions and when not, I was able to do it without his head being covered or my breast on show. I’m not offended by women with their breasts on show when feeding, I’d just rather not see it and I don’t give a damn that anyone is angered by my personal preference.

How degrading for your baby welwyn and yourself.

I guess op you could never eat on a beach for fear of seeing some breast and putting you off your picnic.

This is one of the reasons why breast feeding rates are shocking in the U.K!

I'm currently breastfeeding my 8 month old, who had a nightmare start, tongue tie & reflux made breastfeeding so difficult (poor latch, pulling off & on) should I have stayed in for 6 months in case I put you off your cake? or feed him in a public toilet?

Thank god ive always had positive comments when im feeding.

Jeez, it's a boob ffs & it's doing what nature intended boobs to do!

Not RTFT but have recently had a bit of an overheated discussion with a bloke I work with about women's breasts in public so just wanted to add my 10 pence.

A woman's nipple is not offensive, it is there for a purpose and that purpose is to feed babies. There is nothing sexual about that. No one bats an eyelid at a mans boobs being out in public (and yes, a lot of he time I do mean boobs! Not chest) so why is it okay if a woman's boob is out, it's scandalous and people comment on it, or put it in the newspaper with shocked faces.

It's a fucking boob, chill the fuck! If people find it 'uncomfortable' that speaks volumes about them and not the woman feeding their child minding their own business.

Welwyn, it's not a matter of people being angered by your preference; the issue is your belief that others should follow your practice in retiring to the toilets. No matter how clean they may be when you go in, it's still in most cases an area where your baby will be listening to other people urinating and defecating whilst feeding, and getting the smells which are an inevitable by product. If that isn't the case because there is only one Ladies' toilet, you're being pretty selfish keeping everyone else out whilst you feed.

If you don't want to see other women feeding in public, is there any reason why you can't just turn your head away?

I know one woman out of hundreds who used to go over the top of her t shirt instead of under. No big deal. It doesn’t matter. It’s only a boob and totally natural.

Ceto Exaxtly! You wouldn't go into a public toilet and eat without washing your hands. Why is it okay for a baby to eat in there?

You are so funny OP.

I am late to the thread but here's my take.

I'm currently BF a 16 month old.
For anyone who's had to BF a toddler they will tell you that their attention span is that of a dead fly.
I get my whole boob out because she freaks out if she can't feed properly.
And sometimes she even stops and has a look around.

I could not care less about anyone else near me.
I'm not causing them physical or mental harm. I'm not actively trying to harm them.

If someone is uncomfortable or offended then that is a 'them' issue that they can either get over or go and seek help for.

My 16 month old is my second. I have gone through years of BF now and I officially do not give a shiny shit.

I'm not doing it for my benefit I'm doing it solely for my child. I'm so over it and would love to quit today.
But I won't. Because it's for her.

So someone being upset of offended can fuck off.
I'm upset at 2,3,4,5 am when my clothes are being pulled at because she wants to feed.
Who's going to start a thread about poor me?!

Ceto, that’s exactly what I do, turn my head away.

@Welwyncitydweller
You feed your baby in the toilets?!
That's so strange and gross. Why would you do that? You know you don't have to do that right?!
It's attitudes like the OPs that has made you feel like you have to do that.
The poor baby! Poor you. Poor everyone else needing the loo!
This is why it's so wrong to think like this. something needs to change.

@taylor22 - you’re not the only woman in the world feeding a toddler. All the other women I know who bf toddlers have taught them how to do it under a blanket.