To think this is stealing?

[Dontgiveaflyingfuck]

Dd1 (9) had two siblings for a play date yesterday (9 and 10). My only rule is that my bedroom is out of bounds. I asked dd1 to fetch me my sewing kit from my room - what i later found out is one or both of the siblings followed her in and ate some of my sweets. Dd1 is autistic so cannot easily lie and rarely breaks rules so i believe her when she said she didn't touch anything.

I spoke to the other mum this morning and said i wasn't sure which of her kids had stolen but i thought she'd want to know. She laughed and said its not stealing just sweets. Surely going somewhere you are not allowed and removing something is stealing? Or AIBU? I'd be furious if it was mine! Fair enough a 2 year old but surely by 9 and 10 you should know what not to touch.

Ahh so stealing a sweet means you haven’t been fed?
And yes I did steal sweets as a kid and biscuits etc I then stole sweets from shops and have done as an adult (I’ve stolen food when I’ve had no money to feed myself) not proud but there you go. I’m not saying these kids will end up that way. What I am arguing is that just because of their age or what the item is or even if we’ve done it ourselves, that doesn’t actually stop it being stealing does it? Regardless of what you do at home teach your children that different homes have different rules and to wait to be offered before taking. Is that really so hard?

Sorry last post should read "but on another thread someone drops a quid..."

This must be a wind up. Daily Fail article?

Hide the darn sweets!

She did hide the sweets

On a shelf in her bedroom in a box

Laughing so hard at this thread!!! It's SWEETS!!! Get a life. Yes they should gently be told not to do this, yes the mum is a bit naughty for belittling it but seriously.....its SWEETS!!!

I feel a little shame to know about this; that some people begrudge visiting kids a few sweets.

yes, quite right that the little darlings should go in her room, go through her stuff and pinch her sweets. Thats how children should be brought up. They should go where they want and take what they want. After all they're only 10, the wee precious things. They dont know any better do they. And we shouldnt teach the precious things that its wrong as the sweets dont cost much anyway. Won't someone think of the children for goodness sake!?!

loving

Try it at the local one stop

Go on i triple dare you no returns cross keys

(No one ever takes my dares)

I wouldnt want the children in any trouble

But they need to kmow its stealing or they will be in a whole world of pain when they grow up

So what I have gathered from this thread is that, it is ok to steal from someone’s house if it is a 9/10 year old child who should know better if it is sweets in someone’s room high up on a shelf? No one is saying they deserve a beating or deserve the police calling but it is stealing and to deny that is so fucking confusing, to me an adult, let alone a child.

Is stealing from a shop ok? Is stealing from a room in a shop that children aren’t allowed in ok? Because if you use the logic on this thread about someone’s home then yes stealing from a private room in a shop etc is perfectly ok.

What about if a 14 year old child steals

Cos i could tots send ds2 round (he is really cute so it'll be win win)

I hate the phrase 'play date'. Haven't read any further.

Rufustherenegadereindeer1 it seems it would be perfectly ok because, according to this thread, stealing from someone’s home if it is edible and in a room that you aren’t actually allowed into is perfectly ok. Who fucking knew eh? You are allowed, from any age I would imagine, to walk into a house help yourself to something without asking permission and consume the product then walk away with no intention of replace the item and it is ok. It’s minor which means it isn’t stealing. Better let oxford know that the meaning of the word minor now means that stealing hasn’t happened, in fact better add into the definition of ‘steal’ that if it is an edible item from anyone’s home it would not be classed as stealing and is fair game.

Can I as an adult walk into someone’s home eat whatever I fancied and that would also be ok?

No quack you cant

As you are neither 10 nor as gorgeous as my 14 year old

Honestly he is beautiful

So in 30 seconds, these children managed to home in on sweets hidden high in an unmarked box and devour them. Jesus, it makes me worried what else my DDs' 'playdates' might find when they come round here (every fecking week).

It's like a plague of locusts when they do, but the ring leaders are my own DDs. In this case, they were quite obviously tipped off as to the whereabouts of this adult sweet stash by the host child. And the OP has now effectively put a massive spanner in the works of her DCs' friendships. If I was the challenged parent, I wouldn't be sending them back for more.

That’s a shame, I was going to see if next door had any snacks in as I am out of them.

Interestingly i just asked ds2 and dd

Ds2 (after about 20 mins of me going..yes i know steve doesn't like chocolate but if he did...and yes i know steve doesn't come round the house but if he did) said that if steve took the ripples out of the wardrobe then he would be stealing

Dd said its wouldnt be...because as far as she is concerned the ripples are one quarter hers and it would be sharing...i then said what if it was mummys posh chocolate and she yelled at me for chaning the parameters of the discussion

It was a really frustrating conversation

Munch

Yes my god finding a coin on the street was tantamount to robbing a bank but actually going into soneones private bedroom, climbing on thier bed, taking down a closed box and helping yourself to
thier property is ok. Who knew?

These kids were using age-old survival instincts. Can't begrudge them that. Only doing what nature wants them to.

Outwitted the OP.

However, as the mum of said kids, I would have given them a right talking to about being more civilised.

The kids did nothing wrong. The OP was outwitted and the mum failed to use this as an educational opportunity.

Both mums failed. Kids won.

Actually it’s technically burglary

It's a psychological test for kids to resist candy. It tests maturity. They failed. Why do you keep sweets only for you in your bedroom?

But I had meds stolen by dd friend. Much more serious. I now lock my door if kids come over. Lock every door that I want private; office, ds bedroom, my bedroom. Kids are sneaky, devirus and curious.

It may be stealing but only by definition, not social mores, to most of us.

Devious...devirus?

Shortbybothsides

It's much easier to sever children's friendships than to actually explain to them what they did was wrong, isn't it?

As a kid, I would have been mortified and probably shouted at my friends if they had climbed onto my Mum’s bed. Didn’t your daughter say anything?