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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

How to get out of something that I didnt agree to?

999 replies

KungFuPandaWorksOut16 · 18/10/2017 15:59

I am very close friends with a group of 5 ladies, known each other since high school.
We all have children ranging from the ages of 1-6.

Friend 1s child started reception this year and has joined the PTA aswell. Friend 2 & 3 already have children at this school. Friend 1 is the only one on the PTA.

Friend 2 has just text me, saying she didnt know I was offering a prize at the christmas fair.

Me: What?
F2: One of the raffle prizes is a colour & cut at KungFus Salon.
Me : Must be an error and mean another salon.

Cue a whatsapp message of friend 3, with a screenshot of the flyer and the message "kept this quiet. Its lovely of you though"

In the flyer it mentions how the school will be grateful for donations etc etc, raffle tickets go on sale after the school holidays for X price. It then goes on to give a "sneak peek" for some prizes up for grabs and sure enough their is my bloody salon 3rd on the list offering a colour and cut.

Text F1 did she sign me up. Yes she did, that was her contribution (?!)
I asked F1 will she be paying for the voucher. She has responded No, she wont be because its for a good cause and the rest of the community has donated bits and bobs.

Now Im stuck.
I didnt agree to any of this and now leaflets have been given out advertising my salon donating one of the prizes.
All the money goes to the school so it is a good cause, but i just see it as my child doesn't attend that school or any school for that matter. This "donation" will leave me anywhere from £30-£45 out of pocket.

Would i look horrendous ringing the school up and explaining what has happened or shall I suck it up and just do it.

OP posts:
Bluffinwithmymuffin · 18/10/2017 22:50

I also agree with what zzzzz said. Good karma for you, OP Smile

Just make sure the friend knows she owes you one and she's never to do anything like this again

Sunnysidegold · 18/10/2017 22:51

Gah! What a c.f.! I thunk you've handled it perfectly and I hope she uses tonight to think about her actions!

Is anyone else imagining a salon actually called "kung fu salon"....OP I think a rebrand is needed in honour of this thread!

user1465335180 · 18/10/2017 22:52

Kung Fu, I am truly proud of you! Ignore her all night and enjoy

whyioughtta · 18/10/2017 22:53

If it's her contribution she needs to cover the cost, otherwise it's your contribution. Cheeky twat

famousfour · 18/10/2017 22:53

She doesn't sound like a great friend 😒

Bratsandtwats · 18/10/2017 22:53

Keep ignoring her texts until you hear back from the school/PTA. Let her stew!

melj1213 · 18/10/2017 22:53

Just be prepared for the HT to try and put the pressure on you to still donate that gift

Considering the circumstances I doubt they'd be so shortsighted.

If the HT was stupid enough to try and pressure the OP into honouring a "donation" she didn't make then it's their own fault when the OP then chooses to withdraw any gesture of goodwill she has been willing to make (with the alternative service she has offered) considering that she has no obligation at all to provide anything.

Calvinlookingforhobbs · 18/10/2017 22:54

Well done. Kung fu!

Mumof41987 · 18/10/2017 22:55

She is a CUNT

Evilstepmum01 · 18/10/2017 22:56

Nice one OP! Loving the sorted it text! Bet CF is squirming!

Willow2017 · 18/10/2017 22:58

Good one!

Bet she is crapping herself and txting friend 2 & 3 like a maniac Smile

Anniegetyourgun · 18/10/2017 22:58

She is a PTA PITA!

It's depressing to think someone with this little grasp on reality is actually the parent of at least one child.

Badweekjustgotworse · 18/10/2017 22:58

brilliant kung to bed indeed, she can stew in her own juices for a while

TheSnorkMaidenReturns · 18/10/2017 22:58

Good work!

ReanimatedSGB · 18/10/2017 22:59

Well done for standing your ground OP. I loathe people who try to emotionally blackmail others into giving away their time/money because it's 'for charity'.

ChasedByBees · 18/10/2017 23:00

Fuck me she is unbelievable.

Not wanting to even contribute a 1/3 of the cost of the gift she donated, but the person who has nothing to do with it should shoulder the whole £45.

Personally I couldn't be friends with her after this.

TimeIhadaNameChange · 18/10/2017 23:01

Think you've handled it brilliantly.

One question, though, did you email the woman or send her a FB Message? Because if you're not friends with her she won't necessarily find the message until she looks for it.

Just a thought.

CrazyDuchess · 18/10/2017 23:02

Blatant placemark- I've read this thread like Shock

LexieLulu · 18/10/2017 23:03

This is amazing, what a cheeky fucker. Don't tell her what you've done as she'll have an alibi ready

midnightmisssuki · 18/10/2017 23:03

hahahaha - CFF is going to be up alllll nighttttt longgggg (probably tearing her hair out in frustration)

ZenNudist · 18/10/2017 23:04

I dont really understand why you dont talk to each other. Seems like a toxic friendship.

pleasestopsnoring · 18/10/2017 23:04

Omg 😂

NobodyKnowsTiddlyPom · 18/10/2017 23:04

Wow. Just wow!

SandyDenny · 18/10/2017 23:05

Well done OP.

I can't see a HT wasting time by getting involved in PTA raffle prizes. I'd hope not anyway.

Your F1 should be left to sort it out by the rest of the PTA, might teach her a lesson

BadLad · 18/10/2017 23:07

Much more restrained than I would have been. Hope F1 is shitting herself.

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