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Original poster

How to get out of something that I didnt agree to?

999 replies

KungFuPandaWorksOut16 · 18/10/2017 15:59

I am very close friends with a group of 5 ladies, known each other since high school.
We all have children ranging from the ages of 1-6.

Friend 1s child started reception this year and has joined the PTA aswell. Friend 2 & 3 already have children at this school. Friend 1 is the only one on the PTA.

Friend 2 has just text me, saying she didnt know I was offering a prize at the christmas fair.

Me: What?
F2: One of the raffle prizes is a colour & cut at KungFus Salon.
Me : Must be an error and mean another salon.

Cue a whatsapp message of friend 3, with a screenshot of the flyer and the message "kept this quiet. Its lovely of you though"

In the flyer it mentions how the school will be grateful for donations etc etc, raffle tickets go on sale after the school holidays for X price. It then goes on to give a "sneak peek" for some prizes up for grabs and sure enough their is my bloody salon 3rd on the list offering a colour and cut.

Text F1 did she sign me up. Yes she did, that was her contribution (?!)
I asked F1 will she be paying for the voucher. She has responded No, she wont be because its for a good cause and the rest of the community has donated bits and bobs.

Now Im stuck.
I didnt agree to any of this and now leaflets have been given out advertising my salon donating one of the prizes.
All the money goes to the school so it is a good cause, but i just see it as my child doesn't attend that school or any school for that matter. This "donation" will leave me anywhere from £30-£45 out of pocket.

Would i look horrendous ringing the school up and explaining what has happened or shall I suck it up and just do it.

OP posts:
CauliflowerSqueeze · 18/10/2017 21:25

F2 and F3 are as pathetic as she is devious if they are actually sponsoring her lie.

What a bunch of idiots.

melj1213 · 18/10/2017 21:28

How should I word it to the head PTA??

It depends on whether you want to withdraw entirely, offer another service or are willing to let it stand provided the PTA contribute at least some of the cost.

Dear

My Name is KungFu and I am the owner of . It has come to my attention that flyers from are advertising a voucher for a "Cut and Colour" from my salon as a raffle prize for your upcoming Christmas Fair.

Unfortunately there appears to have been a miscommunication somewhere as I have not donated this prize nor have I been approached about this and at this time I am not in a position to make a donation of this service.

Therefore, could you please ensure my details are immediately removed from the flyers. Thank you Kungfu

Whilst I am unable to offer the stated service, as a gesture of goodwill and to prevent any negative publicity to my business from this mixup I am willing to offer in lieu of the original offer. Regards KungFu

If the PTA would like to keep this voucher as a raffle prize I am willing to offer it to you at a discounted price of £X (full retail price of service is £Y). This is a goodwill gesture that will allow the school to have this item as advertised but also means that the impact on my business is minimised considering its inclusion was not originally sanctioned by myself. I look forward to hearing from you further regarding this matter. Thanks, KungFu

~Delete the paragraphs in italics as applicable depending on your preferred outcome.

Original poster
KungFuPandaWorksOut16 · 18/10/2017 21:29

lola live outside of manchester Grin

How does this sound.

Hi X,
A few of my friends children attend X school, and mentioned you was the head od the PTA. Ive noticed my salon is on the leaflet for the christmas fair for donating a cut and colour. As the owner of the salon I haven't offered this donation. I was wondering if this was a typing error? If it isnt an error may I ask why my business has been listed for donating a prize?
Many thanks
Kung Fu.

OP posts:
Flisspaps · 18/10/2017 21:31

Sounds good to me

StealthPolarBear · 18/10/2017 21:31

That would do nicely!

Original poster
KungFuPandaWorksOut16 · 18/10/2017 21:31

mel ohh I like that, sounds much more professional than mine.

OP posts:
Rainbunny · 18/10/2017 21:32

I would probably do it since it's gone this far but I would absolutely contact the PTA and explain my anger and concern that I was signed up for this and it was put on flyers without my knowledge or consent. You don't need to mention your "friend's" name, the PTA will address it with her. FRankly I think the PTA needs to know that one of their members is acting in this way, she'll probably be asked to leave the PTA or at least pay for the services she "donated" on your behalf!

Findingdotty · 18/10/2017 21:33

Melj1213's answers sound much better OP. I would go with one of their suggestions.

StealthPolarBear · 18/10/2017 21:35

Kung-fu yours is fine. Completely and utterly professional enough

magoria · 18/10/2017 21:36

I don't think you should say it is an error. It isn't.

Bluntly state that you have been advised x has offered your services without contacting you and had confirmed they are not covering the cost.

BewareOfDragons · 18/10/2017 21:36

I'm not sure I would bother pretending I didn't know how this happened, tbh. It's out there (here), your friend is being shockingly defiant regarding her brazenness in spending your money at Christmas while she couldn't possibly affect her own Christmas ... I'd hang her out to dry.

scootinFun · 18/10/2017 21:37

As a PTA member myself I second calling the school to let them know that there seems to have been a mixup. You can then offer a voucher for an updo or cut post Xmas if you like and take advantage of the free publicity. If that’s not an option let your friend know that you expect her to subsidise the voucher. I’d be raging myself!

Badweekjustgotworse · 18/10/2017 21:38

Kungfu no offence but don't ask if it was a typing error that's ridiculous, like the accidentally typed the full name of your salon. Just say you've been made aware through friends who have children at the school that your salon has been listed as a contributor to the raffle however you have not offered to provide any service or indeed been approached by anyone asking for contributions. You'd be happy to provide an updo to save the school any embarrassment but would appreciate being asked and also you'd like to be able to put stipulations such as availability dates so as not to loose paying customers in busy periods and an expiry on the offer. Kind regards etc..

magoria · 18/10/2017 21:38

At the moment she can back track to the PTA and say of course SHE was going to cover the cost.

OliviaBenson · 18/10/2017 21:39

Just tell them the truth that your friend offered it without your consent. You will lose the moral ground if you make out you didn't know. Just be honest!

FetchezLaVache · 18/10/2017 21:40

In view of your last two updates, I'd reply:

"Don't you dare put this back into my court. You didn't even have the courtesy to ASK me if it was OK before pledging my time and money. Why should I be out of pocket coming up to Christmas when I don't even have children at the school? You can either cover the costs of the cut and colour yourself, or I'll have to talk to [head of PTA] to try and sort something out that will get me out of this without damaging my professional reputation."

OhBigHairyBollocks · 18/10/2017 21:41

She's a cheeky fucker!

scaryteacher · 18/10/2017 21:42

OP It should read 'you are the Head of the PTA'

It might read better 'that you are the Chair of the PTA'

scaryteacher · 18/10/2017 21:43

I would also tell F1 to FO to the far side of F off and when she gets there F off some more. Remember, it's MN , 'No' is a complete sentence.

MsPavlichenko · 18/10/2017 21:43

I'd make it clear you know the source of the offer. Otherwise she'll be able to suggest you've fallen out or whatever.

Along the lines of ... CF may have suggested I would donate, but unfortunately didn't contact/ask me . That you have suggested she buy a voucher, or at least make a contribution but no response, then the rest.

Makes it clear it is her fuck up, and you offered solutions. Which is all true. You could then offer a lower costed, later date voucher if you wanted (to have the moral high ground). Sorts out the issue, and the PTA will know what she's like, and to check offers in future.

scootinFun · 18/10/2017 21:43

Ooh I like Mel’s response - use that and text her with a vague ‘sorted it’. It’ll drive her nuts, cheeky fecker!

HotelEuphoria · 18/10/2017 21:44

Magoria has a point, and at this stage the CF could still take F2 and F3s £15 and put it towards a voucher to save face.

I would name and shame and offer nothing in its place, not your circus.

Willow2017 · 18/10/2017 21:44

Not with all the txts she has sent op and other friends. She wont even pay £15 towards it she isnt going to pay £45.

Badweekjustgotworse · 18/10/2017 21:45

Oh god scoot yes yes yes to texting 'sorted it' it'll drive her up the wall!

Wreckingball25 · 18/10/2017 21:46

Yes, definitely don’t ask if it was a mistake, as you know what’s happened and want to be beyond reproach. Impressive level of cheek by her!!

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