Parents who think rules don't apply to them

[mintinbox]

Just went to the harvest festival assembly at primary school where my kid was performing. The whole school was.

Announcement at the beginning no photographs or filming please turn your phone off.

Smug bitch in the second row filming the whole thing on her phone. A woman in front of her was caught taking a photograph and told not to by a member of staff (not made to delete it though) and said "oh I didn't know" of course you knew.

I have reasons for my child to be on social media with her school name attached and I'm sure I'm not the only one in the country who feels this way either.

Of course I didn't say anything to the filming mother as my child could be in a class with hers for years and so frictions are best avoided

I'm absolutely raging though.

Would i be ur to not allow my child to ever participate in school assembly's plays or anything like this again because of some selfish ignorant twat?

Our school does allow video and picture taking during shows but does say not to put it on social media. What is really annoying is when the people doing these things block your view whilst your trying to watch the show. They should be told before the performance that any filming etc has to be done without inconveniencing others. Also they are told to stay until the end of performance to prevent disturbance. As if they do. They always seem to be the people hogging the front seats as well. If you know your gonna leave early at least have the decency to sit near the exit.

We had this with kids previous school ( like you reasons why I signed NO to social media and photos ) but wasn't respected and risked my children.

After much kick off was mentioned during assemblies but again no one listened.

At new school it's a long running rule. Some parents have tried and failed but we all stand up and shout at them as it's mentioned then staff intervene.

Just because certain people put everything about their lovely little darlings on every social media platform.... Some of us do not want that and have very valid reasons.

Speak to the school, as those people would need written consent from every parent who has a child that is caught in the photos.

If like we did, you sign a form to say no social media then they need to enforce the silly ones, I spoke to a solicitor regarding previous school ( which the head did not like at all ) but I signed forms for a reason other wise the schools should not waste time printing them.

Good luck hun x

I'd like them to ban filming school plays at our school - if only to stop all the selfish parents holding up a full sized iPad in front of everyone else's view!

My friend's husband wasn't allowed to film her in the local swimming baths with their young son. People do it all the time when they're abroad.

trueheart1 and thereIsIron
.... LAC and ex LAC children is one extremely good reason!!
They are not allowed to be put on social media, filmed or even in the paper etc without consent.
My son is an ex LAC child and last year the new starters had their picture taken without any notifications and put in the local paper-my child included... I didn't find out until I read the paper and saw my son beaming at me.... His birth mother found out where he was and tried to abduct him-very cleverly done and very well thought out with several other people involved with the attept so preplanned. Police heavily involved, several arrests and my looking over my shoulder even now a year later with contemplating moving towns etc but not what any child or parent should have to go through. Ps Yes the school did feel my wrath!!

My nephew's school did a block ban but staff filmed and dvds could be purchased for personal use only which was a good idea in my mind-as others also say a just to stop loads and phones blocking people's views and more safety for children

A parent at my child's playgroup, who is on the committee, filmed a bunch of the kids at a fete, listening to and dancing to music, and put the film on the fully public social media account of the playgroup in question.

If any one of those kids were a looked-after child (in care) or hidden from a parent or other relative due to domestic violence or mental health problems, they will have been instantly identifiable and their care setting nicely advertised alongside.

People are just fucking stupid, sadly.

I'm with you OP. Thr issue is some people are rude, entitled and think they and their children are exempt from rules if they don't like them.

It will be these parents doing what they like and backing their child right through to y11 (often with the 'it's not my problem if schools have stupid rules. Theu can't expect respect and people to follow rules if they are stupid )

I think there should be an alternative though.
I remember parents when I was at school filming with a camcorder but they stood off to one side and it never went anywhere other than their home video library.

Social media changea things. Kids can't go to the park without thr day being documented.

Kids in their costumes photos sounds good. Equally, the school could take some photos in hous and then only release the ones without children who cabt have their photo shared. Or could the PTA record one and put it on DVD for a couple of quid and make it clear it is NOT to go on social media (thrn have something where if they do thry can't have copies of future events / still an issue or they continue with phones then they can't come to events in future).

Plus when kids are performing thry want to see their mum's face, not a screen!
There's a reason a lot of weddings are explicitly 'no photos' now because viewing life through a screen is ridiculous.

We say no photos or filming, 'please enjoy the play' announcement from Head. The PTA film it, we are given guidance if any child should not be seen. If at risk child is a main role, I assume we would be asked not to film.
All parents are invited to take photos of their children in costume after any show or assembly.
Totally, totally disagree with anyone here saying it's unreasonable to follow no photos/filming rule. You do not know better.

Write to the school governors, as I think this is a safeguarding concern that they should be considering.

You may find the rule is nothing to do with the school. I've worked in schools and education management all my life. Because of the increasingly complex legislation around safeguarding, Many Local Authorities have banned schools from photographing Looked After Children including fostered children, children in care and adopted children. There is nothing the school can do about this - they have to implement this policy.
So, to everyone who wants the policy changed, I would say contact your local county council member and / or join a political party and campaign for a the change you want. I cannot imagine you would get a lot of support and frankly 'this is health and safety gone mad' is not a very convincing argument for legislative change. However, as a voter, you are perfectly entitled to do this. Complaining to the school is not the appropriate channel - they have rules to follow as well.

Totally, totally disagree with anyone here saying it's unreasonable to follow no photos/filming rule. You do not know better.
But that's where you're wrong. They DO know better on everything from photos at performances to their creative understanding of uniform and behaviour rules.
You miss the point. These people are enlightened beings who have such knowledge of all things that they are qualified to conclude they are exempt from rules they dislike.

I have reasons for my child to be on social media with her school name attached and I'm sure I'm not the only one in the country who feels this way either.

Obviously it wasn't that big of a deal seeing as you didn't even attempt to do something about it.
If i were that concerned/worried about it, then interrupting/risking future drama would be well worth it. Actually i wouldn't give a shit about anything else other than what the 'smug bitch' was doing.

I think schools should take a photo of individual children and phones etc should be banned from performances. I'm sick of parents filming every bloody thing distracting people from the performance and including my children in the film. It is so selfish.

Fluffypinkpyjames one of the reasons filming is banned is to do with child protection laws.

At our eldest son wedding last year we were given very strict instructions what we could take to upload.

There was a child at the wedding that was adopted. One of the rules of adoption now is the adopted child photos cannot be placed on social media until the child is old enough to have there own account and make there own decisions. It is clear I think as to the reasons why.

This will follow the same in any place public photos can be taken and be uploaded such as school shows

Er Kelfie you’ve got the wrong person, I fully agree that nobody should be taking photos or filming children, what are you on about?

There are laws against taking any kind of reproductive material e.g. photos and videos of children underc16 years. You must have guardian permission. As school clearly stated "no recording" they were trying to safeguard kids. Anyone who flouted the instruction and the law can be prosecuted. Just think of where some of the photos/recordings can end up and potential consequences.

How do you ensure any kind of filming doesn't land up on any social media site

This posting and some responses has really rattled me. If adults cannot figure out why there should be no recording of any kind they must be living in a vacuum. School should announce that due to infringement of no photography ban there will be no audience to any function involving children in future. There will be uproar from parents. However the idiots may well realise their behavior is out of order and agree to hand in phones etc (plastic bag with label and some kind of identification e.g. child's date of birth on it) if they cant leave the contraptions at home for an hour.

I think it should become a blanket ban across the country. How safety of children isn't top priority is beyond me.
What the hell will it take? Some poor child being abducted or killed as a direct result?

Have been a long time member on Mumsnet but don't comment very often. However, having seen the attitude of some tonight, I am absolutely shocked. I have 4 children, ranging in ages between 11 and 22 and they have all attended the same primary school with the various plays, sports days etc.

I really do not understand the ignorance of some people on here. How can anyone possibly believe it is more important to get a photo of video of their "little one" performing than to protect a child who has already been through a tough time. I am amazed that a moderator hasn't been involved in some of these comments.

I was involved with the same primary school for 17 years continuously. Initially social media was not really much of a factor but, by the end, it was very much so. The school went through various phases, from photographs and videos sold so that nobody could take photos and videos during performances, to photos and videos being permitted and, more recently, photos and videos being permitted but for personal viewing only and not for social media. I have to confess to finding it very distracting having parents with iPads and the latest top-of-the-range cameras taking photos/videos of their child, with no regard to those sitting around them - never mind the safety of other children. I have also seen photos appear on social media after such events - as someone who rarely posts photos of their children, I found it annoying that my personal life was being shared elsewhere. For me, it was nothing more than irritation; I can only imagine what it must be like for those who hide their identity for any of the reasons previously mentioned on this thread, or any other reason.

The worst thing about this thread is the complete ignorance or lack of compassion by some, as to why photos/videos shouldn't be taken and shared. The "it's my child and I will do as I wish" comments absolutely astound me. I used to work in an Accident and Emergency Department and it reminds me of the people that would come in, when it was neither an accident nor an emergency (think forgetting to order a repeat prescription, or unable to get a doctor's appointment because they had a meeting at work) and then complain about having to wait, demanding to be seen as they pay their taxes so it's their right to be seen without waiting.

I hope the people who have made these comments on this thread were doing so just to provoke a reaction; if that is their true belief, then I can only hope that they never find themselves or a loved one in the situation that others find themselves in where, preserving their anonymity, can iterally be the difference between life and death.

Im so glad dd school isnt on the ban train
We trusted to use common sense, what a funny logic that is.

Im so glad dd school isnt on the ban train
We trusted to use common sense, what a funny logic that is
I used to be of that view but then someone in a child protection training session changed my mind.
They said call it good practice, not common sense because common sense ks never as common as you think.

I think this has become an issue more in the social media era. When i was at school there were a couple of parenta who camcorded everything, but they stood at the side, were unobtrusive and the video never went anywhere.

Now people want front row seats so they can watch the performance through their screen and get the perfect photo of their child (and show no consideration to othet parents or the kids), which will get uploafed and location tagged regardless of other parents or child protection.

If the school have children who can't be photographed then they have children who can't be photographed.

Common sense says that if they are saying no photographs or videos during the perfromance there is a reason.

If people choose to ignore that then it proves that thay childs protection trainer said: common sense isn't that common.

Bold fail
Im so glad dd school isnt on the ban train
We trusted to use common sense, what a funny logic that is