To think that this teacher should not have told-off a pupil on the bus

[Bookaboo]

Couple of hours after the end of school, a few kids on the bus and a guy who happens to be a teacher at their school.
The teacher stopped one lad , who was probably only in year 7, and started grilling him about why he had no tie on. Told him to see him at break tomorrow for detention, but the kid was on his way home & was doing no harm.
I felt really sorry for the kid & felt like the teacher was just being an asshole.
If that was my son in a few years I wouldn't want him to be treated like that. I know that schools have an image to uphold etc.. but jut couldn't help thinking that stuff like this makes kids feel miserable about going to school.

If he had on his school uniform and it's a school rule they need to have on their ties.

@YourDaughter if you're going to make a comparison at least make it a relevant one. Not wearing a tie several hours after school has finished is nowhere near bullying.

And I also don't agree that wearing a uniform in school prepares you for wearing one when you start work. You don't really need preparation for wearing a uniform... You just do it.

Ties are ridiculous for everyday wear. They're disappearing from even the stuffiest workplace, other than for interviews or particularly important meetings.

WTF schools have been thinking, reintroducing them over the past few years, I really don't know.

You could ring the school and say that you wanted to remark on a couple of boys who were so well behaved and polite on the bus home that you had to bring it to their attention

I like your thinking plantsitter.
I might also mention to them that the kids' good behaviour is a much greater positive representation of the school than a perfect uniform ever could be.

Whilst this is also a rule in my DCs school... the wearing of full uniform to and from school ... I think the teacher thrives on authority and is something of a jobsworth.

I did wonder if such teachers actually have a life outside school.

I'm an advocate for sticking to the rules, but the power goes to shines teachers heads.

YANBU at all. I remember walking home from school on a warm summer afternoon (on my own, over a mile from school) and having a teacher pull up beside me in her car to ask why I wasn't wearing my blazer. I reacted with complete disbelief - and I was very well-behaved in school generally. That teacher lost my respect that day.

School uniform rules are often ridiculous, but it's fair enough that during the school day, teachers will enforce those rules regardless of what they personally think about them. That a teacher would go out of their way to make a fuss about a tie hours after the end of school, however, is either completely bonkers or a nasty power trip.

People talk about schools and judge them by the behaviour and appearance of of pupils outside the school grounds.

Behaviour possibly, wearing a tie, no. I would feel deeply sorry for any child whose parents made decisions about which school to send them to based on something as shallow as that.

Power Trip

And there in two words is why we have an issue with discipline in schools

That's ridiculous
. In this context, I stand by my comment . It's heavy handed and unnecessary to bark out orders and dish out a detention for a missing tie out of school. Save your detentions for nasty or disruptive behaviour on the bus.

And no, I'm not that parent that takes my child's side and encourages them to disrespect their teachers.
If my child came home with such a detention I'd tell them it was their own fault and to face the consequence.

I'd eyeroll to myself though. I think we've all encountered those teachers that relish in exerting their power in front of an audience, and nit pick over uniform rules.

I think we've all encountered those teachers that relish in exerting their power in front of an audience, and nit pick over uniform rules.

Applying the rules is not "nit-picking". Every teacher who lets something slide makes it harder for those who enforce the school's rules, e.g., I was in Mr X's lesson and he let me..."

I despise uniforms thoroughly, and I enforce the school's rules thoroughly.

@JonSnowsWife

Guess what the teacher I spoke to said? "we take our reputation very seriously".

I'd have hoped they'd be more concerned with the safety of their pupils and members of the public.

I attended a school that was very concerned about its reputation. It seemed to be their priority over just about everything else, including the well-being of their students.

This, IMO, is a stupid, unnecessary rule. However, I may be biased as my DD had a very unpleasant meeting with a teacher at the beginning of the day.

She was twelve at the time and had just walked two miles to school on a hot September day (but winter uniform, so long sleeves and ti.) Blazer was in her arm as it's black and hot and heavy!

She got shouted out at in front of friends and students, "HOW DARE YOU WALK TO SCHOOL WITHOUT YOUR BLAZER." Supposed to be representing the school, etc... [hmm

She came home and told me. We reviewed school rules and there was NOTHIG about this supposed rule of wearing full uniform.

Other children also had issues... were shouted at for wearing waterproof boots home/to school when it was snowing or raining! Kids on bikes told to ride wearing blazer instead it being in bag when they are quite long and could get caught!

Eventually some of us parents wrote a letter to school and they said it was okay, finally accepted that a) sometimes children don't want to wear the uniform outside of school, if the school day has ended, they should be allowed to just enjoy themselves and be kids b) it's impractical and even dangerous sometimes, ie, in heat or bikes, and c) uniform wasn't going to create a good impression with all the children crossing the road like idiots and the older ones swearing!

That teacher was representing the school in public and doing an utterly terrible job.

That teacher was representing the school in public and doing an utterly terrible job

How so?

echt Well clearly the OP wasn't impressed.

I would be horrified to see a teacher be so petty and authoritarian, and would certainly think twice about sending my child to a school where the teachers intimidate young kids (who are quietly going about their business) outside of school, for no good reason.

I would like to see a teacher being friendly to kids when meeting them out of their normal setting. 35 years later, I still remember running into my high-school English teacher at a book store, being excited to see her in a different setting, having a short friendly chat and coming away with new sense that she was actually a real person, not just "Mrs XXX". I think if at that moment she had told me off for some silly reason, I would have lost respect for her.

echt Well clearly the OP wasn't impressed. I would be horrified to see a teacher be so petty and authoritarian, and would certainly think twice about sending my child to a school where the teachers intimidate young kids (who are quietly going about their business) outside of school, for no good reason.

Just because the OP wasn't impressed doesn't mean the teacher was out of order.

The OP does not know the school rules on uniform in and out of schoo for that school, so cannot judge. A number of posters have pointed out that schools often have rules about appearance and conduct off premises while in uniform. The teacher cannot be judged as being petty or having no good reason. The long and short of it was the OP had insufficient info to make judgments.

Don't know where you get the "intimidated" from, as no reaction for the child was described.

JonSnowsWife yes, but obviously that is a different issue to someone not wearing a tie. As I said before, not wearing a tie isn't harming anyone, what those children did to you is and is of course unacceptable.

I find the strictness with uniforms odd anyway. In the USA most schools don't have a uniform at all. I'm sure the kids there don't suddenly pass out with shock when they have to follow a dress code when they start work.

Do people think humans are so stupid they need twenty years to be prepared to learn how to wear a uniform? I never wore one- I learned instantly. I am clearly a genius.

Just because a school has a stupid rule, that doesn't make it enforceable. If a teacher tried to pull this shit when I was woth my child, they'd get told in no uncertain terms that they were overstepping. But I doubt many teachers would do this because a) most teachers are reasonable people with more important stuff to do and b)because the sort 9f people who do this are cowardly in picking on children for no real reason and their power trip wouldn't work if they had to confront another adult instead.

Just because a school has a stupid rule, that doesn't make it enforceable. Er...yes it does. If a parent thinks the rule is stupid, that can go elsewhere or approach the governors.

If a teacher tried to pull this shit when I was woth my child, they'd get told in no uncertain terms that they were overstepping You are that parent.

people who do this are cowardly in picking on children for no real reason and their power trip wouldn't work if they had to confront another adult instead They are not being "people " in the general sense. This person was teacher who, as far as can be ascertained by the OP, who has offered no info to the contrary, was following the school rules. Those would be the ones, which as an employee of the school, they have to follow.

Those would be the same rules that mean that had your child, Adeyrn come to harm when at, on the way to or from school, the teacher would have had to intervene.

All adults should intervene if a child is being hurt. That is not the responsibility of teachers because they are teachers, but because they are adults.

I disagree that this rule is enforceable - I am in charge of my children outside of school, not the teacher. I don't see that I need to object to this rule via the governors because I see it as having no more validity than if the school told me what my child should eat for dinner!

Teaching does attract some bullying types (am a former teacher and have seen this in action). If objecting to this makes me 'that' parent, I am happy to be so.

The 'you signed up to this, if you don't like it take them elsewhere' argument means nothing in areas where there is one school and that's where you go.

Whenever there's been a tv programme on about failing schools one of the things a new team of management does is look at the uniform.

There's definitely something about the kids wearing regulation kit and being tidy that has a positive effect on behaviour. I'm sure there have been studies on this.

If that's the rule (and at our new parent school meeting there was lots of nods and smiles when the head said that the kids needed to wear the proper uniform and have their shirts tucked in properly), then it's the rule.

Anyone who is or has been a teacher, or has teachers in the family will know 'that parent' who will argue every rule that they don't like and loudly kick off (even threaten teachers) but be the first up yelling the odds when their kid comes home without their coat or bag, or gets into a fight.

Do senior executives get a bollocking from their boss when they remove their tie on their commute? Or for changing into trainers for their walk home?

Are you less likely to get ahead, or to secure a prestigious contract for your employer, if a client spots you on the Tube without your jacket?

Maybe not but if they posted a Facebook shot of them mooning or face down in the gutter then they could be disciplined.

Maybe not but if they posted a Facebook shot of them mooning or face down in the gutter then they could be disciplined.

Not remotely comparable to removing your tie two hours after school has finished.

Does it matter if the parent is with the pupil at the time? I'd be a bit annoyed if a teacher started telling me what my child was to wear when accompanied by me. An example could be going to the dentist after school.

It's comparable because kids won't be posting adult stuff on Facebook.

The school uniform is the kiddie version of representing the school as the posting drunken shots /racist rants on social media would be to an adults employer.

Sorry if that's garbled it I'm just hopping off the bus.