to think not everyone has "the girls", goes out for "girly chats" etc

[CaptainWarbeck]

It does my head in and I don't know why. One of my friends is always referring to 'the girls' when she talks about her mates, and when we go for coffee together she gushes about us having such a good 'girly catch up'.

What makes it so 'girly' other than us just both being female?! I have just as good in-depth chats with male friends and I also just have a bunch of different pals who I see at different times, rather than a select group of female friends who go out on the town together as 'the girls' - usually while their boyfriends/husbands have a 'lads night out'.

Why does this annoy me so much!!

Maybe it is a comraderery (sp) going out with the girls means i love spending time with these women they are my tribe

Men say out with the lads don't they?

It's just a phrase!

I have different nights out depending who I'm with - the girls / the Uni lot / old friends from school / couples night out / big group night out (mixed)

I'm 40 and everyone I know refers to 'the girls' when they're talking about their close friends.

I find it intensely irritating, same as any infantilising term. However I have found (this probably isn't the same for everyone) the women who tend to do this have often been in relationships where they've been treated quite badly, emotional abuse etc so even though they have friends of both sexes they might have reason for wanting to share with other women who might sympathise/know what they're on about. Not saying that men can't but it is usually women that have direct experience of this!

'Lads' night out' is even worse though...

One of my lovely friends does this but she is SO LOVELY (genuinely) I've learned to overlook it.

There will shortly be a million posters saying a) they like it-it makes the feel young b) the word "boy" is used to describe adult men in exactly?the same way c) what else are we supposed to call a group of "females" d) haven't we got anything more important to think about and (probably) e) it's things like this that put people off feminine.

I like evenings out with my female friends. But they are just 'nights out', with no reference to 'the girls', or 'girly'. I fucking hate that term.

Also - with regards to 'couples nights'; those who do these, do you not allow solo friends? Even if you adore them? Not so on my social group. People get invited regardless of relationship status.

YABU.

Some us prefer (and need) female-only get togethers with zero interference from overbearing males.

I am not a girl. I am not friends with any girls. We are women!

No problem at all with women-only get togethers -I enjoy them.

What’s wrong with going out with the girls? Are you jealous because she seems to have more fun than you?

Mumsnet, marvellous for judging people with no reason . Warms the cockles of my hear it does.

I doubt cougars on the hopeful pull or thirty somethings tenuously clinging on to their youth has the same ring to it as girls night out.

Maybe the women who use the word are trying to prove something - like how "popular" they are? It's a bit playground.

I despise any phrase that is "girly " It should have been left behind at school really. I do have "girl time" with DD but she is 11 and likes it when her older brothers aren't around.

I probably have an equal number of male friends and female friends. None are overbearing or giggly (on either side!).

I don't normally comment on these threads as doing so kind of undermines my point.

But I'm always surprised how harmless slightly twee crap infuriates people so much. Think of your blood pressure!

I don't really use that expression. I'm not a girly chat kind of person. I don't do 'girls lunches' etc. I do say I'm going out with 'the football girls', 'NCT girls' etc. but only because it's more descriptive and quicker than listing them individually by name. I'm also less keen to say Mums as in 'NCT Mums' as these 'gatherings' are without children and NOT a mum event. I don't use 'women' either even though it's more correct it seems a bit less personal iykwim.

Doesn't bother me as much as grown women who say "my best friend". I always think in my head...are you 9?

"What’s wrong with going out with the girls?"

Prefer nights out with adults (and booze) to ones with children, whether they are girls or boys. Each to their own about what constitutes fun though.

Hate infantile terms being misapplied. Speaking to a group of people who don't mind being infantilised is one thing. But doing so in print to a global audience (such as MN) or in conversation to people who don't like it is pretty tacky.

'When I got a new car, a friend said she hoped I'd been for 'lots of girly spins'. Why? Just why?'

Why indeed

Cringe

Do people really do "couples' nights"? That is worse.

Over-thinking the whole thing - quite typical of Mumsnet.

If I go out with a group of female friends, it's simple and easy to say 'I am out with the girls' rather than saying 'I am out with Mary, Jane, Sally, Deborah, Pam, Julie, Amanda, Sue, Kate and Sarah'.

If I am meeting a group of male friends, I say 'I am out with the lads', rather than 'I am out with Paul, John, Anthony, Mark and Bob'.

Girls night doesn't bother me

'Girly' makes my teeth itch

I don't mind "going out with the girls" as a phrase so much. It's the "girly" thing that bugs me. What is "girly"?

Agree 'couples night'

Worse by a mile

I socialise practically exclusively with women- book club, theatre with a group of childhood friends, all work colleagues, walking next weekend. FB is 90% female too.

I would never talk about 'the girls' or deacribe something as girly.
As I am a woman not a girl.

Lol. X Post