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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Regale me with Cheeky Fucker stories

858 replies

TellMeItsNotTrue · 24/09/2017 15:31

I'm stuck in bed feeling ill, bored and pissed off with the whole situation, AIBU to ask you to entertain me with your tales of CFs?

BTW daily fail and other websites/newspapers can fuck off, my fee for this piece of journalism is 2 million pounds and a takeaway pizza, non-negotiable so if you don't agree to those terms then kindly FTFOTFOSM

The only one I can think of at the moment is last year when a neighbour knocked at our house, we get on great with most of our neighbours but this one looks down her nose at everyone and keeps herself to herself. She told me that I needed to make sure I was home the following day Confused I asked why and was told I needed to be in for the delivery Hmm wasn't my birthday and didn't have anything ordered so I asked what was being delivered and how did she know "oh it's not for YOU tinkly laugh no, its from laura Ashley you see" still none the wiser I ask who it's for then and why do I have to be in "well because they said it will be tomorrow and I have appointments! I will be getting my hair done and of course my nails, so I've told them to deliver it here" she then walked off leaving me with my jaw on the floor. I made sure I was out the following day and just put the we missed you card through her door when I got home, not spoken a word to me since, but that isn't unusual for her anyway

OP posts:
Thread gallery
6
keepcalmandfuckon · 20/10/2017 05:36

@Piewraith why are you still friends with her?! She’s a pathological liar!

keepcalmandfuckon · 20/10/2017 05:36

And a thief!

KC225 · 20/10/2017 06:46

Piewrath so cannot believe you actually went into the bar with her and are still friends.

FairfaxAikman · 20/10/2017 08:38

Piewrath if she was going to go to the ATM as soon as you got to the bar, why did she need you to give her any? Is she coin operated and can’t walk without having cash on her?

Piewraith · 20/10/2017 08:42

@keepcalmandfuckon and @KC225 yes you are right, looking back I can't believe I did it either! She is a bit of a liar, thankfully now she has grown out of it - not that she was that young at the time, about 25 so no excuses really. Why do any of us put up with these CFs? Anyway since then I would never let any CF get away with it, and am happy to loudly embarrass them if needed. Maybe it was a lesson I needed to learn.

Piewraith · 20/10/2017 08:45

@FairfaxAikmen she needed it to give to another friend who had brought her alcohol to pre drink before we went out. I guess the friend knew her well and asked for immediate payment before handing over the booze!

frieda909 · 20/10/2017 09:23

Justsaynow I completely agree about not being able to judge poverty from clothing and accent, but I assumed beyond meant that she was sorting donations elsewhere (e.g. the supermarket) ready to be taken to the food bank, rather than giving out donations at the food bank itself. In which case people definitely can’t just walk up and help themselves (in fact even at the food bank I don’t think it’s a ‘help yourself’ system).

Of course that doesn’t change the fact that someone might still have been in need, and maybe it would be better to offer information about how the food bank can be accessed rather than just saying ‘no’. But I’ve volunteered at supermarket collections before and unfortunately some people really do just take the piss.

I’ve had people walk up and make sarky comments about how they’ve paid their taxes so where’s their free food? Or ask me why they should help when ‘nobody’s ever helped me!’ And while I hate to judge, it almost always is the person who’s walking out with a bag full of finest-organic-whatever clutching the keys to their BMW.

WashBasketsAreUs · 20/10/2017 09:39

Protectingmydaughter yes it was only a lift but it had been going on for years, with cf friend constantly not being ready and never thanking me. And I mean years! I'd say something a lot quicker now!

NightTimeIhadaBrainChange · 20/10/2017 10:01

Used to live in halls as a mature student. Second year there, first day back, DP comes to ask if I've opened the punnet of fruit he'd bought. I say no, and he shrugs. We're in our floor's kitchen a while later and this guy walks in, mentions he'd helped himself and apologises. We don't think too much of it as we're nowhere near shops and he's obviously not have a chance to buy anything for himself, so we let it go. Big mistake.

We end up buying milk, bread and other supplies as a group with friends. No official arrangement, just whoever is going to the shops buys what we need and we all use it. This guy joins as a takes, but it's not until February before he contributes anything, and then only because his girlfriend, who had been to stay and knew exactly what he was up to, sent him back with some bags of stuff 'for the kitchen'. He was not at all embarrassed that it took someone else to make him do this.

The most outrageous was the time he decided to go to another kitchen with his friends, as our kitchen was too full and he didn't feel welcome (I wonder why). He took teabags, mugs and then proceeded to pour a full pint of our milk into a measuring jug to take with them. A pint for three people!!!!! I think that was the first time I actually said anything to him.

We all started keeping what we could in our bedrooms rather than the kitchen, but he moved to different halls before the year was up. Not a moment too soon.

harrietm87 · 20/10/2017 13:44

We've just sold our flat. Buyer is a CF. Had about 15 viewings pre and post exchange, annoying enough. Then asked if his "handyman" could come
for a viewing as he was planning to get works done. Took DH's number. Big mistake. DH was then bombarded with texts and calls from numerous tradespeople wanted to come in, who then started turning up to the flat (DH works from home) at all hours demanding to be allowed in. They assumed (or CF told them) that we were tenants and CF was the landlord and that they therefore had a right to be in there, and got really aggressive. DH is much softer than me and agreed an appointment with one of them. Guy was an hour late so DH went out and then missed him. CF then started sending abusive messages saying we had wasted his tradesman's time. He then texted me asking us to drop the keys off to his handyman rather than the EA on completion day, and could we let someone else in to look at it on the say before (when we would clearly be packing). I sent a strongly worded reply back saying he was taking the absolute piss and he could get his quotes etc done in his own time, when he actually owned it. I still don't know whether he was a total CF or just completely naive about how the whole thing is meant to work.

paranoidpammywhammy2 · 20/10/2017 14:08

TellMeItsNotTrue

I think CFs target a certain type of person to take advantage of. I've had many CF incidents probably stemming from my upbringing. My family and extended family contains many CFs.

I don't think CFs realise how demanding and selfish they can be. They seem to view things almost as if we should be honoured to help them out and that they associate with us.

Standing up against CFery is really empowering. I stood up against minor things at first then tackled major issues. CFs have boundary issues. I am now less walked all over and feel proud of myself.

Original poster
TellMeItsNotTrue · 20/10/2017 15:48

Paranoid I seem to attract them too, and also have family members who fall in to CF category. I'm getting a lot better about not letting people get away with it, but they know I'm a sucker when it comes to DC and I need to work on that.

Totally agree about them acting as though you should be honoured they've asked/graced you with their presence! They also would be the first to refuse to do any little thing out of their way/pay a penny more than their share etc and would be outraged you asked, yet expect you to go so far out of your way/give up so much of your time/pay far more than your fair share or cover their share completely

OP posts:
Bitsy1968 · 20/10/2017 15:53

@ChevalierTialys

Mother muttered "but he was desperate" whilst I pointed out the cafe next door. That has a publicly available toilet. 5 feet from her precious child's present location. A toilet. An EFFING toilet.

I didn't shout, because it would have frightened the kid and it's not his fault his Mum has the manners of a dog, pissing wherever they want, but she was left under no illusion that I was NOT happy with her for pissing all over my sodding garden.

My lavender....my lovely lovely lavender. Now smelling of 5 year old's piss.

Lovely.

paranoidpammywhammy2 · 20/10/2017 17:19

I have to say though - CFery does seem to be profitable. They seem to win / get away with things for a long time. It's bad that we have to constantly be on alert to guard against it.

velvetcandy · 21/10/2017 22:32

I can't believe I only just remembered this one. DH birthday, we invited mil and a few of his family members round for a birthday lunch as ds was only a few weeks old and we weren't up to going out. It was crystal clear it was a birthday lunch with buffet. I did an online food shop and did a lovely buffet lunch, had a birthday cake from m&s, I went to quite a bit of effort etc catered for 7 people. Anyway I noticed that no-one was really eating anything much just picking at food. I offered up the food to people a few times, but the usual oh I'm too full or polite no thanks. I thought wtf why except an invitation to a birthday lunch and sit at our table not bloody eat anything! Then his cousin made a joke about stopping at the harvester on the way home. You could see on mils face in particular that she looked awkward. Anyway they basically went for a meal at the harvester round the corner from my house after they had been to ours for lunch. I was pretty pissed off.

velvetcandy · 21/10/2017 22:35

Forgot to say DH cousin tagged himself into it on Facebook the silly prick. I swear his family just get kicks out of upsetting me.

TitaniasCloset · 21/10/2017 22:47

Velvetcandy they are arse holes. Unless you were offering a buffet of offal and the weird food on a particular thread right now, then my guess is they just do shit to undermine you as a mother and housewife. I have been through this.

mummymummums · 21/10/2017 22:57

My DH was married (and divorced) before I met him. He had a very expensive pram that his sister's friend asked to buy. Sister went off with it and no money was ever handed over.
When he and I had DC his sister suggested she get back 'his pram' as her friend's family was complete. She was completely ignoring the fact that actually he'd 'sold' it to her friend who never paid for it. Which his sister knew.
The pram arrived back but was only fit for the dump. Absolutely and irredeemably trashed. So we had to buy one, having had the £600 one trashed for us.

Protectingmydaughterfromfilth · 27/10/2017 01:32

Velvet I would’ve lost. My. Shit. At that point. I would’ve demanded they reimburse you for the money you spent! That is disgraceful behaviour

Protectingmydaughterfromfilth · 27/10/2017 01:34

I must say, after reading this thread I am gobsmacked how few of you have actually stood up to the CFs?! Most of you have seemingly just turned the other cheek and not said a word? If you let people like this get away with it, then they’ll keep behaving like this, surely?? Or am I missing something???

Sweetpea55 · 27/10/2017 04:13

Then he come back to the door and shouts that he wants the vacuum cleaner as well.
Im like Goliath by this time ,,open the door and hurl it out,,it goes flying through the air and just misses him....unfortunalty,,

OnlyInBerkshire · 27/10/2017 08:18

A few years ago we were lucky enough to rent a holiday cottage on the coast (for a year) which we used each weekend, often inviting friends and family to join us. One single chap who had been our guest asked if he could stay on a few days after we went back to London for work - no problem, we said. A month later I get a £100 telephone bill, on a line we never use - it’s there just for the broadband. I call to dispute it- turns out he made a 2 hour call to Dubai he never thought to mention. Didn’t pay us back.

Next time we saw him he said he’d take us out to dinner to apologise - fair enough. Big meal for 3 nice place. But when the bill comes, he’s forgotten his wallet! Never paid us back for that either. Not friends now..

beyondworriedmum · 28/10/2017 07:32

Thank you everyone for your kind words just need a safe place to vent as I am a hot head myself and am finding it impossible to keep a lid on things xx

beyondworriedmum · 28/10/2017 07:33

Oops sorry wrong place posted 😱

paxillin · 28/10/2017 18:58

CFers do smell a good victim. I used to get lots of attempted cfery. After I learned to say no to things I don't want to do, I don't get many attempts any more.