Saw a dad hit their child on the school run. Do I report it?

[Moanyoldcow]

Please tell me if I'm over reacting. I'm extremely anti-corporal punishment, was not hit as a child and do not hit my son.

On the school run this morning there was a father and son who I see most mornings. They were a little late today and the boy was really agitated about it asking his dad to hurry. His dad was annoyed and kept saying they were very close (which is true) and to stop worrying.

The boy was obviously upset and pushed his dad. His dad responded by hitting him twice on the back of his head. It happened about 8ft in front of me.

I said (loudly but didn't shout) 'don't hit your child' twice. He turned to me and put his finger up to me like he was about to shout and I said again 'don't hit your child'. He was very angry but just said 'FINE' and we all finished the walk to school arriving about 1 min after the bell.

I know that parents can hit their children within limits so what he did wasn't illegal. I suppose I worry that if he'll do that in public, what does he do in private?

I would recognise him and the child so I could make a report - I just don't want to blow one incident out of proportion but if it's more I'd hate to ignore it.

What should I do?

I dont smack my kids as a rule, but I smacked my son once, last year when he brought down the seventh curtain pole in our house, caused by swinging on the curtains. Seven curtain poles ripped off the walls in about three weeks. He never did it again. You all probably think im a psycho but I wont sit around smiling at the little darlings while they wreck our home, thanks and I had tried everything else. Normal rational reasonable parents can make their own calls. However I would say that cuffing a child across the head is absolutely dreadful. and can only have been done in anger

to blame the dad entirely for what happened is a shitty and malicious attitude.
Dad was in control of his own hands. Son didn't make Dad hit him. Yes son pushed but son is a child and its an unnecessary escalation of force

Police officer here.
Can we all stop saying it's legal to hit your child
It isn't.
'Lawful Chastisement' is a defence to assault, just as Self Defence and Implied Permission is (ie Rugby match)
If an assault on a child (and that is what it is, no matter what posters like Blink say to make themselves feel better) makes it to court, it will be for them to decide if Lawful Chastisement is accepted as a defence.

All this nonsense about ABH, GBH etc needs to stop. It lets people like the man you saw OP feel that what they are doing is acceptable.

As for 'Its none of your business'.
I guess it was none of our business with Victoria Climbè. Or Baby P.
Let's all just bob along in our own little worlds keeping our noses out.

Rant over.

In my experience as a Lawyer, some police officers have an abysmal understanding of the law. It's only unlawful if it amounts to unreasonable punishment. Of course it's up to the courts to decide but they should follow the law and the CPS wouldn't continue a case where a child wasn't injured, regardless of whether a member of the general public agreed with the law or not.

To all those saying there was other ways to stop my dd running in the road and the ridiculous comment about growing out of it and being a bad parent, don't be stupid. I smacked her to stop her doing it again not because I panicked or to punish her. Rather a light tap on the legs then her being dead and a traumatised driver. But hey perhaps I should have kept explained why it's wrong and saved up for a funeral.

Police officer here

washing I believe the term is now reasonable punishment as opposed to lawful chastisement.

As in, it is an offence to hit your child accept when doing so constitutes reasonable punishment.

Something that irks me daily because it shouldn't be ok.
Quite weird how anti this thread is because usually anti smacking threads on here go the other way.

I do think you are over-reacting.
A cuff on the head does not necessarily equal abuse at home, it means he is disciplining his child in a way you do not agree with.
Perhaps you parent your child in a way he does not agree with?
Perhaps your child does not push you like his pushed him?
I admit I've cuffed my kids on the odd occasion in the past but it was all in situations where reasoning would not have worked or they were in danger.
I realise children are the most vulnerable members of society but equally they are children who often lack common sense such as not running into oncoming traffic.

Exactly you can't reason with small children in life and death situations.

OP. Your recent post says he was hit once, you called out as the blow landed and the dad turned around as the boy ran away.
The first post says he hit him twice. And then you all finished your walk to school. Which was is?
Because if you can't be consistent on important details like that you aren't much help at all, are you?

As a high court judge.... But hey, there is a very good reason we don't allow police officers to make charging decisions - they would get it wrong too often. Also, where a defence exists, it's not unlawful, that's the point - assault on a child can be lawful.

I just find it all a bit strange that such details have changed in the space of a day. But sure, it gives us all something to talk about all day. I'm sure it all happened and I'm sure op has learnt their lesson.

damfine post as many grin smileys as you want, I don't give a toss.

Oh and by the way, it's not a teachers role to smack because it's unlawful.

Tell me, oh super mum, if you'd sat your child down every night to explain in great detail the danger of running onto a road, disciplined them when they continued regardless, what would you do? Sanctimoniously patted yourself on the back when they are killed because you didn't smack them to stop them? Well jolly good for you and hard luck for you child.

He hit him twice in quck succession so as the first one landed I said 'don't hit your child and he hit him again very quickly as I said 'don't hit your child' a second time. It was all very fast. As I said in my original post I said 'don't hit your child' twice.

@MrsMHaslt - you are an exceptionally unpleasant individual. If you think I'm lying report me.

Learnt my lesson? From you? Oh please.

I really hope as someone said above its NOT down to the school whether to report to SS or not
As their judgment could be tainted by personal views or if they like the family and so on.
Really unprofessional if that is the case!

Sorry, you're 'pulling me up' for using the phrase 'walk to school' because the boy ran ahead and I didn't disclose that in the OP?

I'm done now.

Thank you everyone for your advice. I've made my report, nothing else to be done and I'm not going to give a second by second account of every detail.

It honestly feels like some posters come on here just to be unpleasant for the hell of it.

You did the right thing , the school can keep an eye out for further behaviours that are concerning

My dad cuffed me around the head as a child once, I remember it and it was the only time it happened

Op take no notice
You did the right thing, obviously!
Well done for helping a little boy and speaking up
The man is clearly a bully

I'd always challenge violence when I see it - they made it my business doing it in front of me. Seen men hitting women (I dumped my cowardly boyfriend on one of these occasions who wouldn't intervene) a farmer whipping a calf (I was 15 then and was ready to jump on him) and kids beating up other kids. Glad you said something OP.

I am anti smacking and particularly can't stand to see children hit on the head. On the other hand, I did get smacked as a young child a few times (never on the head) and it didn't bother me.

My DD has never been smacked but my DS was once. He was just over 4 and during a tantrum, he hit me. My dh saw and smacked him round the legs. I was outraged but DH waited for DS to stop crying and then said to him "it's not nice when someone bigger and stronger hits you is it?" When DS agreed he pointed out "one day you will be bigger and stronger than mummy. You will never, ever hit her".

My point is that some people feel smacking has its place, others don't. Neither view makes them a bad parent or person. My dh is a great dad and it wasn't done in anger or as abuse. It was a lesson he felt our DS needed to learn.