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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Friend wants money for bed

189 replies

TouretteNanna · 20/09/2017 19:32

Hi.
Last year a friend was going through some hard times and she had to downsize. She rented from me (below market rates) and I was happy to help her until she got on her feet which she did.

When she left I helped her to dismantle furniture/clean/sort etc. She had a spare bed that wasn't needed and told me I could have it -she also said it was the least she could do/had nowhere to store it etc etc.

We stored it Ina garage and we're planning to put DS in it but we've since decided to get a double bed with storage

I posted the bed locally on some selling sites and my friend has seen it (I haven't heard from her in weeks) and posted

" I noticed you selling my bed and the interest innit online. I hope you'll be fair and give me the proceeds of the sale."

Am I wrong in thinking when you are given something and no longer need it you give it away or sell to move on? The bed was gifted to me.

AIBU?

OP posts:
easterholidays · 20/09/2017 20:24

Oh, cross-posted with Things and expat.

Bluntness100 · 20/09/2017 20:24

I know technically it's yours absolutely, but she gave it to you for your son, I think finding you never using it and selling it instead could seem a bit necky, she could have done that herself. I would have texted her and said " look we are not going to use this now, do you wish it back or can we give it to charity or sell it", I suspect she thought you wanted the bed at the time, more than she was saying I'd love to gift you a bed. You wanted it so she let you have it.

However she shouldn't have commented when she saw you selling it. That's rude.

pictish · 20/09/2017 20:24

I agree with Expat as well...she gave it to you and that's where her say over the damn bed ended. Graspy, opportunistic caaah.

SonicBoomBoom · 20/09/2017 20:25

She's a grabby, ungrateful sod.

Give her back the bed, if she wants it, then fo

Justaboy · 20/09/2017 20:26

Tell her you had to pay someone to come and take it away!.

IME old beds arent worth a light anyway!..

expatinscotland · 20/09/2017 20:27

She didn't give it to her to use for her son but because she didn't need it and had nowhere to store it.

existentialmoment · 20/09/2017 20:28

I noticed you selling my bed and the interest innit online. I hope you'll be fair and give me the proceeds of the sale

I'd reply."Sure no problem. But since we are taking back things given in good faith, can you pay me the difference between your rent and market value for the time you were renting from me? Only fair, if that's how you want it...."

pictish · 20/09/2017 20:32

Exactly - she had nowhere else to keep the bed.

wowfudge · 20/09/2017 20:34

Fgs there are some strange attitudes on this thread: she gave it to the OP. It wasn't stored with the OP to be collected at a later date, nor was lent to the OP. It is the OP's to do with as she pleases. I'd be inclined to tell the silly cow the proceeds of the sale can be knocked off the bill for the rent she owes you or some such.

pictish · 20/09/2017 20:35

I'd be tempted to take it round and leave it in her front garden with a note attached.
"Here's your bed back."

Knittedfairy · 20/09/2017 20:37

She gave you the bed, so she has no claim to it or the proceeds of the sale. Remind her that gifts come with ribbons, not strings.

PaintingByNumbers · 20/09/2017 20:39

It is super chavvy to sell something you were gifted as a favour. You gift it on in turn or return it, or expect messages like this/social death

Pblac · 20/09/2017 20:40

Such angry people on here ...

Is everyone 13?

Confused
pictish · 20/09/2017 20:40

"It is super chavvy to sell something you were gifted as a favour. You gift it on in turn or return it, or expect messages like this/social death"

  1. No it's not.
  2. Says who?
  3. I really don't think so.
  4. It's a bed?
PaintingByNumbers · 20/09/2017 20:42

Says everyone I know, none of whom would do it, as it is scummy and we have better manners, also you'd be ostracized and everyone would slag you off forever
True story

pictish · 20/09/2017 20:43

Then I hardly think it is I who is lacking class...do you?

PaintingByNumbers · 20/09/2017 20:44

Things like this are exactly the kind of thing that people bitch about for pretty much the rest of your life if you live in a small town. Hope op doesnt.

expatinscotland · 20/09/2017 20:45

I'd love to be ostracised by people who have nothing better to do than slag off those they consider friends.

This friend wasn't doing the OP a favour, she gave her the bed as she had nowhere to store it.

PaintingByNumbers · 20/09/2017 20:46

Well, its where the op finds herself as well, so hopefully she feels the same way

MissEliza · 20/09/2017 20:46

She didn't gift it to the Op! She was too lazy to take it to the tip or sell it herself so gave it to her, Tell her she can have the proceeds once you've deducted storage fees plus sales commission.

Original poster
TouretteNanna · 20/09/2017 20:47

Paintingbynumbers
I'd stand on the street in a cling film bikini and Perspex stripper heels, naked selling anything you'd touched if that's your attitude

I'd be delighted to be ostracised by you and your mates

Grin
OP posts:
pictish · 20/09/2017 20:48

If someone leaves a large piece of furniture in my house because they've got no storage for it, it is not scummy for me to sell it at a later date when I no longer want the bloody thing either. Telling me it's a gift makes no difference, it's just dishonest.

expatinscotland · 20/09/2017 20:48

Since when did 'gift' become a verb? Is this like 'invite' as a noun? Never mind the gift, I prefer being ostracised by people with poor grammar.

imjessie · 20/09/2017 20:50

I don't sell anything that has been gifted to me .. but she has a bare faced cheek if you let her stay for a reduced rent ! The fucker !!

PaintingByNumbers · 20/09/2017 20:50

Lol expat, things are always bad when you have to fall back on the old 'bad grammar' dig