To be pissed off with marrieds who don't work complaining they are tired?!

[sloeginforever]

I know everything is relative and everyone has their own problems...but I am sick of hearing mums of school age children, who have partners, who don't work, complaining they are tired and have so much to do!

I am a single mum, I work full time. I get up at 5:30, deliver three children to different schools about ten miles in total, then drive to work, work a full day, collect same children, go home, cook everyday, clean the house, wash all the clothes.

I've got one friend in particular who is a stay at home mum. She texts me all day moaning about how tired she is, since they went back to school there is just so much to do, and getting it all clean before they get home is soooo hard. She's so stressed by it all. Her husband works, takes the children to school, cooks...

I have absolutely no issues with life choices as a stay at home mum. I'm not jealous and I don't have issues with them not being in full time work or anything. But just stop telling me how hard your bloody life is!!

And don't even start me on the married, childless woman at work who just got a dog and is soooo exhausted.

Rant over.

I'm neither a passionate pet lover nor hater but to echo previous posters anyone who adds a pet into the mix is asking for more trouble. I know a couple of folk who've gone and got pups with a demanding young family and stretched schedule - guess what, one pup is now already at Battersea and the other owner is patiently waiting for her brother to come back from abroad so she can offload the dog on him.

Seriously - WHAT possesses these folk? And who walks the dog during the day when everyone is away doing their thing and being oh so busy?!

Not attacking you @PurplePenguins - I have no clue as to if circumstances changed after you got the dog.

If another poster posts how early they get up and how much house work they do I think I may spontaneously combust!

Why make pack lunches? Instead of making pack lunches you could you exercise. It's about how you prioritise your time

We don't all have a choice about packed lunches, but how much exercise are you going to get done in the 7 minutes or so it takes to make 3 lunches?

Existential - surely most schools provide lunch? And yes you can exercise in 7 minutes! Get a skipping rope. Do press ups. Sit ups etc etc. That's what I do and I am fit as a butchers

Mine doesn't. And a skipping rope? In my kitchen at 6,30am? Then I would need to "prioritise my time" into taking one or more children to a&e when I take their eye out with it!

A thread like this was always going to turn into a competition for who has the busiest day. Around where I live, riding the horse, directing the gardeners and squeezing in a quick manicure and trip to the gym, is a very busy day for some. My point being, we are all generally busy with our respective lives, just busy doing different things. And it's not my place to judge what people do with their days, nor anyone elses for that matter. Some of the posts on here just reek of green grass bitterness, highly unpleasant!

I find people like your friend don't get irony

I said to a friend who has one child at school, doesn't work or volunteer, that I was knackered as I'd worked loads of hours that week, she replied you're lucky you have time to work, what with having to walk the dog (a pug who doesn't like to go far...) and change the beds, she would never have time to work.....

what do you say to that

Nice to know my experience as a working single mum didn't count for anything because I only had one child!
The competitiveness on here is out of this world.
I also had four cats at the time if that ups my score?

Oh yes and did 12 hour shifts as a nurse with no relatives to help out in this country.

Only one child at school, doesn't work..doesn't volunteer... good grief how despicably lazy! Since when has it been anyone's business to judge what people do with their lives? Clearly the domain for those who are not too happy with their own!

I'm a single parent who works f-t. Am I the only one who lounges in bed till the last minute and leaves all the housework to the weekends, so I can sit on the sofa with dd and watch reruns of GBBO?

I was going to tackle the washing up last night but cut a finger on the scourer and gave up.

Bibliomania..best post so far

Biblomania - my kinda girl!

Everyone is different. Everyone adapts to situations differently, especially when looking after small children. For the few years i was a SAHM, for various personal reasons, it could often be one of the hardest, exhausting of times.

You just can't judge these things, in this way.

No one gets a medal for these things.

I'd feel the same op. Your friend sounds draining! Some people are just unaware of what's happening outside their own bubble

Not easy and don't know how you have become a single parent of three children. Your attitude is though unreasonable especially if you are a single parent through choice. Too many folk embark on single parenthood without real consideration of how they will exist and find it quite a shock that basically your life is not your own and of course there is the "what about me " attitude. Where is the kids father? Can he not offer assistanc? Life can be hard and exhausting, your life, get on with it and dump your friend as you obviously find her irritating and totally unsympathetic to your circumstances.

Those who complain about puppies being full time work should have done a bit more research into what having a puppy/dog means. Lots of folk think they are cute little things and give in to children's demands for a pet. A dog is a massive responsibility and can be very expensive especially as they age. A lot of work has to go into owning a dog and if not trained properly can lead to horrendous problems for you.

I hate the expression "busy mum". I have one child and work the equivalent of 4 days a week and have hobbies but I am not busy, have time to stay in bed if I want to at the weekend (I choose not to on a Saturday so I can go to parkrun) and if I don't want to do housework that is not absolutely necessary eg washing so that we all have clothes for next week I don't.

You're as busy as you make yourself. If you work FT, have 4 kids and 3 dogs, I can imagine you'll be busy whether or not the kids' dad is around. Equally if you have high standards for your home and everything has to be just so. But that's a choice you make.

But in my case I stopped at one child and don't have pets.

Being a lone parent is very very rarely a choice! So I disagree you can be as busy as you choose!

I'm not sure what the statistics are but I am sure plenty of people decide to be lone parents!

You may well decide but your hand will more than often be forced. Not sure how many women sit in their secure homes looking at their lovely supportive dh think they'd rather do it alone!

Manic yes that's true to a degree re the dogs-but having had dogs all my life and knowing and being prepared for how much work they are, still nothing could have prepared me for the destructive nature of our second dog. They aren't all the same obvs and if you get a rogue one it's the luck of the draw sometimes-in terms of the unexpected workload it might bring. Which isn't to say it's not all worth it in the end, it's just harder work getting there.

Just to point out that choosing to leave a bad relationship is not the same as choosing to be a single parent. It takes two people to make a baby, yet far too often the mum ends up with sole physical and financial responsibility while the dad does everything he can to dodge paying his fair share or doing half the parenting.

Lawnofdelray you have no idea why the poster is a single parent! Often a person isn't a single parent by choice. I was a single parent for a time before I met my 2 husband 15 years ago. I was a single parent because I finally fled with my 4 domestic violence

None of us have any idea why other posters have ended up as single parents but as someone who's been every flavour of parent from single/married/sahm/pt worker/full time worker- they've all had their pros and cons. Being a parent can be stressful and tiring what ever flavour you are but ultimately you make the choice to become a parent. Stop comparing your life to others. And if I have learnt anything in my many years of parenting - just say no to pack lunches!