To not go on a date with someone who works in a shop

[therealbridgetjones]

A friend of mine is trying to set me up with a friend of hers. I don't know much about him other than he is my age and works in a shop. He lives at home with his parents (early thirties).

I'm in my late twenties. I'm intelligent, have a career, earn above average and have my own house. I've lived away from my parents for about ten years and am completely independent.

I've worked in retail and to be honest it made me work bloody hard at university because I didn't want to end up back there!

My friend seems shocked and calls me snobby because I don't want to go on a date with her friend. She thinks I'm a gold digger but this couldn't be further from the truth! Her argument is that it's about the person and not their ambitions etc but surely this is a part of a person? I'm attracted to intelligence, ambition and independence.

So AIBU to not consider a date with this person?

And retail work, it's not exactly a paramedic night shift or a city teacher working hard, is it?

Wow whattabouttery.

You must be housebound?

How offensive can you get.

ODFOD

Gosh. You must be housebound? I'm a very nice person and haven't been at all rude.

Nope. You're just further proving how rude you are.

Thats not offensive! WTF are you talking about?It means don't leave the house, doesn't meet people. Was zur Hölle?

ballestief When several people tell you how rude you are, it's time to look at your attitude.

Oh stop being so holier than thou. just because you take issue with what she says doesn't mean she has a problem.

In fact having seen you on other threads I'd say you've generally got a bit of 'attitude' going on yourself.

Oh stop being so holier than thou

How about people stop throwing insults around that is often part of a disability.

As someone that us regularly housebound through disability, it's offensive!

Wow. Did someone really just use "housebound" in a put down?

Yep

SerfTerf Yep, and she still doesn't think she's rude.

Can't believe this thread is still rumbling on. But it has certainly taken a turn.

Someone just used "coloured child" on another thread (!)

It must be a full moon or arsehole night or something.

ballest You do realise don't you that everyone has different strengths and weaknesses? If you can understand that then maybe you could try to understand that some people will find it extremely hard, I would, what with having severe anxiety and all that. In fact even without the anxiety I would probably find it hard, I've seen nurses daily and they work is probably harder. However, everyone has different tolerance levels so some may find shop work hard for them if not necessarily for everyone.

It's like saying you had an easy labour and someone with an identical labour finding it hard, would you honestly tell them they were wrong because they found their identical labour (to yours) very hard and didn't cope as well as you did? In principal it's the same thing, even if a vastly different scenario to working in a shop.

My friend used to work in H&M they were expected to work hours of overtime every day without extra pay on a min wage, & it was a town centre store so always busy.

Wild horses couldn't persuade me to go out with a man in his thirties who'd always lived with his parents. Total fanny shriveller.

Can I ask what is the wrong with the term 'housebound' ? Genuine question

I didn't know wild horses were known for their persuading skills.

Dragging, certainly.

I have a vision of a gaggle of horses saying stuff like, "Think of it this way..." and "If it were me..." while looking all earnest.

Can I ask what is the wrong with the term 'housebound' ? Genuine question

The problem is she's using it to be deliberately offensive.

OP YANBU you don't need a reason not to date him either.

Tbh from what you've said I probably wouldn't date him either and I'm in a job that pays nmw.

pictish 😂

The problem is she's using it to be deliberately offensive

What? No she definitely isn't. She meant that if she is the most rude person [whoever- I lose track] has met then they haven't met many people. I can't see that housebound has been used as an insult at all

Which I guess is why her post is still there. Whereas a genuinely disablist comment would have rightly been removed in a millisecond.

I agree, I find their comments rude but housebound wasn't a disablist comment. I have anxiety and depression and until recently barely left the house, still didn't see it as an insult as such.