Am I beating unreasonable. I wrote a "bragging post " so yes but the replies got to me !

[Balletmummy25]

I know I know you bragging posts are annoying !
I was very proud of DD age 3, she had her development review with the community doctor on the hospital ward 3 days ago.

( spent 3/4 of her life in hospital, numerous surgeries )

I was very happy that she came out in some parts ( puzzles , fine motor skills in general , social skills and self caring ) above her age group only ever so slightly above !

Average in other things and below in other parts especially her gross motor skills and speech !

I shared this as family never really get to see her as spend most of her time isolated. Anyway it then followed with comments like

This surprises me I know she can't do the alphabet or count very well yet and " bob " has been doing that ages can't believe they said she was age appropriate.

Followed by

What type of puzzles is she doing as " george" has been doing 16 pieces puzzles for a while and they are the same age, is she still on the wooden pop in types ?!

Kionstigersbeers made a good point. Can you join some private FB groups with people who are a bit more understanding? Make friends that way.

I'd be inclined to post something saying that considering her start in life you are allowed to be happy at things that may seem nothing to others but well done to those who managed to spoil that moment by comparing with children who have not had similar difficulties. Hope it made them happy!

Put it down to experience, update your mental spreadsheet of selfish twats, move on and enjoy time with your family

It was only those 2 comments but suppose it's hard to ignore the negatives, other people did get it !

I think I worry about her it fitting in at school that it probably upset me more than is should have !

People get so competitive over their kids, it's ridiculous. It sounds like your daughter is making excellent progress and you should be very proud, I'm sorry the people you told couldn't take their heads out of their arses for one moment to see how important this is to you. Well done to your little girl, and well done you too

There is a lot to be said for not having a Facebook account. Works for me.

You hit a nerve with them, they thought they'd always have your daughter compare with their kids and look down on and now she's catching up in leaps and bounds.

I'd have loved to have read an update like yours and the replies are beyond rude, given the circumstances.

I thought you meant in here, but you mean on FB or something don't you?

I don't think it's 'bragging'. I just think it's updating family you don't see much of - and they'd probably complain if you didn't 😫😁

Some people can be really nasty 😢😡

However, some people can also just question things without really thinking. I have an analytical mind & it's just natural for me to question things, so I'm probably guilty of this, but I try hard not to do it in social settings. It's honestly not critical at all either. So if you said DD can count to 20 & she's above her age group for that, I'd be thinking 'That's odd, all 2 year olds I know can do that, it doesn't seem above average. I hope they haven't been economical with the truth?! '. But at the same time I'd be feeling really pleased your DD was doing well, irrespective of where she fits in on the 'expected norms' I tell ya, it's busy in my head!🤣

In short, some people are twats & others are just being a bit thoughtless in their comments. Try not to let it get to you. You know she's doing well & that's what counts 💐

You don't sound pathetic at all, you're allowed to share these achievements on FB. Please delete the negative and competitive people. Imagine being so mean spirited you can't even enjoy a child's improved development.

Well d

Thats just mean, they're family so I'm assuming that know some of her medical history.

And even if they didn't, I wouldn't call your post braggy at all.

Well done to your DD. Why can't people just be happy for her achievements.
Someone doing well doesn't mean you and your kids do less well. I can't understand the attitude that would make people post as your friends have.

Your bragging annoys them.
Their bragging annoys you.

Best all round if you stay of social media - seems to raise the temperature of all parties.

Would be very tempted to reply that well aren't you lucky your healthy kids who have not spent most of their life in the hospital are able to do age-appropriate puzzles.

Bitches.

Their bragging doesn't annoy me, I do not mind people posting about their kids achievements or proud parent moments.
I think it's cute and like to see my friends kids doing well as never actually get to see them.
Not sure where me not liking bragging came from.
I would never question their child's ability or tell them a doctor was in fact wrong there is a difference.

I cross posted with your subsequent posts. That was a lovely update & not at all bragging. I'd be thrilled to get an update like that from my SIL, cousin, friend - & MNers. Any posting negatively after that needs a swift kick up the backside.

Try not to worry about her going to school. There's a WIDE array of abilities in all things when they start. If anything, focus on getting her as independent as you can & worry less about the more academic side.

The things that are good to work on are -

Putting her own shoes on.
Putting her coat on & doing it up.
Going to the toilet by herself & being able to get her clothes back on properly.
Changing her clothes in & out of her PE kit including footwear.
Being responsible for her own things (hanging her coat & cardi on her peg etc)
Listening to & following instructions, more than one at a time.
Coping with whatever they'll be doing re lunches.

They'll all need some help and it's not necessary to stress over it, but the more of that stuff they can all do, the more chance the teachers have of teaching.

She sounds like she's coming on in leaps & bounds 😊

Thankyou for the kind comments made me feel better.
I think sometimes one in particular is a person who questions a lot and seems not to know when to stay quiet ( her natural personality )
I know people automatically he's towards stay of social media then, which I find odd haha

It's away of communication and socialising.
If I had this conversation in person and it was said would the answer be just stop socialising altogether !

God, you'd expect family at least to be proud. I go on to family about any small achievement but thankfully my family join in with the boasting as they are proud of dd too.

Op she sounds brilliant and is doing fantastically to be ahead of her age group when she's had so much to contend with.

For reference, my mother decided dd should be in Mensa - she is above average academically but no Einstein.

Delete them OP. As I have discovered here, there are people who sucks the joy out of everything given half the chance. These are not people you want to share with, so delete them from FB because they will always use it to bring you down.

I don't often agree with Neutrogena but in this instance I do. I don't post anything overly personal on Facebook as I find the people I'm more closely involved with are the most judgemental (!). I do post stuff on twitter where I am largely anonymous and find the friends I've made there are noticeably more supportive. It seems jealousies and competitiveness breed more amongst the familiar.

Those people sound rather mean to me. Couldn't they just have been happy for you? I would have been. In fact, I am

I don't think you could even really describe your post as bragging - it's just an update on how an assessment appointment went & the reflection that you're feeling relieved & you're (understandably!) proud of her for well she's doing despite it all. It's brilliant news - see how many people here (including me, in case that's not clear!) are both pleased for you & pretty disgusted by people responding in anything other than a positive & supportive fashion.

I'm sorry people responded with such, well, hostility, almost - I don't have children but am more than aware of how wildly competitive people get about the tiniest things from birth onwards. That is entirely about them, not you, though.

As PPs have suggested, can you create/use [support] networks of parents of other children with disabilities?

Competitive parenting is rife. Everyone wants to brag about their own DC but seemingly doesn't share that joy when someone else is bragging about theirs.

Your DD could have masters and a parent will come along to state how their precious one is doing better. Or how they're "surprised" at the progress she is making.