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Original poster

dd is only going to use gender neutral stuff for her dd?

604 replies

ioliverielinor · 24/08/2017 17:00

hiya,

just looking for views really. is this the new modern parenting? dd2 is expecting a dd herself and has said she would only like gender neutral gifts, i was a bit upset because i think there are some lovely girls clothes, i said will she never put her in dresses, she says no. im a bit surprised really, but yet she is happy to have her hair long, etc.??

just curious if this is the norm now? i have never really heard of it before, dd1 has 3 dc different genders and never had an issue buying them boys and girls items.

im not judging, but think its slightling strange? aibu?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
6
Natsku · 26/08/2017 20:07

I didn't get 'woman' hips until after I gave birth! Before that I often wore men's jeans and whatnot.

aveline161 · 27/08/2017 09:37

We were given all of DD's clothes second hand from a cousin and friend of my mother's DIL. Most was very pink and frilly and not what I would have picked, but it was free and I'm so grateful to have it. I'll be able to pick more neutral/ practical looking stuff later. It's definitely a taste thing- do I like pink frilly clothes on myself? No way! Do I like clean lines and unusual patterns and all types of colours- yes! Have also been bought some lovely bits I like more including a vest with little fruit and veg print on- got baby attached to me atm so can't check where they got it but think it was next or M&S...

kastiekastie · 27/08/2017 13:21

sounds like there's a business opportunity here for someone? gender neutral, interesting clothing. And I am well aware we shouldn't even have to have the conversation about gender neutral in 2017, clothes is clothes, sure as eggs is eggs. My son loved pink til my dad made some hilarious jokes about why he personally didn't like pink. Ggrrrrr.

museumum · 27/08/2017 13:26

Lots of lovely gender neutral stuff here www.bunny-hop.com

Batteriesallgone · 27/08/2017 13:27

There's loads of it about kastie if you know where to look, but it's more expensive than the supermarket stuff and mostly online.

Whatsforu · 27/08/2017 13:31

Exactly sparkly. I don't have to write anything else.

EssentialHummus · 27/08/2017 14:16

kastie I've managed to buy a full complement from Boots, Asda, Tesco, Tu/Sainsbury's, Gap and Next, but it requires a bit of searching.

GreenTulips · 27/08/2017 14:39

I've just been to Tesco to buy DD a ruler - the choice is blue or pink. No other choice available.

heartstornastray · 27/08/2017 14:40

It's fine for boys to wear pink if they want to, but it's also fine for girls to wear it too? A lot of us are a bit anti pink for girls but not for boys i've noticed.

EssentialHummus · 27/08/2017 14:43

Look online green, if you're in the market for gender neutral baby stuff - all the above stores are shite in store but fair online, with more things in other colours (some require more searching than others).

EssentialHummus · 27/08/2017 14:43

Sorry, you're talking about rulers Blush No idea - Smiggle?

SparklyUnicornPoo · 27/08/2017 17:34

GreenTulips Wilko have green rulers

Lweji · 27/08/2017 17:38

I've just been to Tesco to buy DD a ruler - the choice is blue or pink. No other choice available.

What happened to colourless, transparent rulers?

Lweji · 27/08/2017 17:41

I was at the supermarket today to buy DS new school material.
He chose notebooks in every colour for different subjects, except pink and purple, despite me picking one of each as well as other colours.
I won't push it, but I definitely thought of this thread.

OTOH, he has chosen some swimming trunks with red roses on them this Summer. Grin

user1497357411 · 27/08/2017 18:01

LOL!!! My oldest SIL said that before her first child was born and spent the next 15 years in a pink Barbie hell with lots of glitter. I always had glitter on me for days after we'd seen them. SIL had her opinions and is very, very stubborn, but her daughters had evidently inherited her stubborness and they looooved pink and Barbie and everything girlie and SIL just realised that she wasn't seen as having principles. She was seen as being mean, so she gave in. Did you see that picture Themetapicture where a mum wrote that she wanted her DD to be gender neutral so she gave the DD two trucks? Cue picture of two trucks in cots made of shoe boxes complete with little blankies. My DH wasn't allowed to play with toy guns, but when his parents saw him running around with the other boys, all the other boys with guns and DH with his finger pointed as a gun they too realised that they were just being mean and making him feel excluded.

InvisibleKittenAttack · 27/08/2017 21:43

I don't have a problem with a bit of pink, it's the head to toe pink, whole wardrobe of pink that's the issue.

Gender neutral doesn't mean giving girls no access to 'girl' toys and clothes, or boys no access to 'boy' ones, but to give a range of options. Its amazing how many little boys do not have any dolls in their house and never have. They have not been given the option of playing with 'girl' toys, however I have noticed people are more likely to give a girl a 'boy' toy.

catkind · 27/08/2017 22:16

A lot of us are a bit anti pink for girls but not for boys i've noticed.

I don't like pink much, so didn't buy any for either child until they asked, and if there was an option not what I'd put them in. It just took rather more effort /not/ to have DD in wall to wall pink from birth as that's what people gave us as gifts and hand-me-downs. Both requested pink around 4-5 which we went along with. Nor would I turn down stereotypical "girls" toys or "boys" toys if either child requested them, but if anything I tended to err towards the construction toys/trains/ball games side as that's what I enjoy playing with them.

bemusedmoose · 28/08/2017 17:42

Baby clothes always used to be white whatever gender, this gender division with baby clothes is fairly recent.

It makes sense for hand me downs and selling on.

Gender neutral is just the new unisex.

Natsku · 28/08/2017 18:03

I'm going to get white vests and sleepsuits for this next baby and tie-dye them - gender neutral and not boring!

Anatidae · 28/08/2017 18:07

I was wrong before about the age the sewing patterns for kids are sex divided at. It's actually 128cm and up. Size chart below.

dd is only going to use gender neutral stuff for her dd?
LubiLooLoo · 29/08/2017 07:53

Don't take her wanting to do something different to you as a slight OP. She doesn't mean it like that. I think dressing kids gender neutral and letting them play with what ever toys they want is encouraged these days. My little tot had lots of rainbow clothes! He looked bloody marvellous in them! Taking steps to stop gender stereotyping is awesome! Be proud of her 😊

malificent7 · 29/08/2017 08:45

I dont understand why dresses are a nightmare on babies. I found them very practical with no poppers... easy access to nappies.
Boy vabies used to wear dresses too.
Most gender neutral clothing is really cute though and will confuse well meaning old ladies who want to coo over your boy/ girl!

Batteriesallgone · 29/08/2017 08:57

Dresses are a nightmare because:

  • they ride up when you pick baby up. They end up bunched around the armpits. Inconvenient to hold, probably uncomfortable for baby
  • they ride up when baby is in a sling, must be uncomfortable to have that ridge of material around your middle. Not comfy for the adult either
  • they don't provide an additional layer of containment of nappy leaks
  • they ride up in five point harnesses. Like car seats and anywhere else a baby is strapped in
Anatidae · 29/08/2017 09:05

Dresses are a pita because they ride up under snow suits, rain suits/ rain gear, so there's only about 2 months of the year you can actually use them.

catkind · 29/08/2017 18:04

Adding to the dresses are a nightmare because list

  • they often have fastenings down the back which are annoying to do up and then baby is lying on buttons/poppers
  • if it's warm enough for bare legs it's warm enough for just wearing a vest or short sleeved romper. If it's not, you need to faff around with leggings or tights too.