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Original poster

To end relationship over his irritating dog?

180 replies

MauledInPassing · 22/08/2017 20:43

Been together two years but do not live together. He has a dog (French bulldog) which is absolutely fucking crazy and is putting me off taking relationship any further.

Whenever I go to his house it goes nuts, attacks my legs and feet, launches itself at me trying to bite my hands, tries to grab the knees of my trousers - when I sit down it launches itself at my face, gets on the back of the sofa and attack my head, hair, bites my ears - all the while DP is laughing like a loon saying how cute and funny it is. The other day I got mad at it and knocked it off the sofa (a little harder than I should have done admittedly) and it fell onto its back. DP gasped and ran to pick it up. I was mortified and apologised straight away and asked if it was ok. He was really upset and said he was shocked that I could treat an animal in such a way. I felt absolutely terrible but as soon as he let it go it immediately carried on attacking me.

I've asked him to stop the dog from doing this and he makes a half arsed attempt but it just carries on. It runs off with my shoes or any object I happen to have brought into the house. The other day DP was literally crying with laughter in the kitchen. I went to see what he was laughing at only to realise that my hardback had been snatched and taken outside and it's contents all over the garden. Keys, phone, purse, NHS ID card!!! Then this stupid ridiculous animal stood shaking my bag to death growling like a thing possessed. I shouted at DP that this shit isn't funny but he couldn't even answer me for laughing.

He turned up here half hour ago, pooch in tow and asked if I wanted to go for a walk with them. I looked at its fat squashed up face and instantly felt irritated! I like dogs but this thing has something wrong with it, I'm sure.

Anyway I declined, saying I was tired and he said he was worried that I didn't like his dog and was hoping to try a bit of bonding. I don't want to bond with it, it tires me out. Apart from the biting it constantly covers me in an awful white slime which makes me wretch.

I'm seriously considering ending the relationship over it. I'd never expect him to get rid of it but I personally don't want to be around it. I feel awful because at heart I know it's just an innocent dog but I just don't like it. I've never felt like this about an animal before.

OP posts:
YorkshireTree · 23/08/2017 07:34

What is wrong with people on here? The dog was biting her! Of course she pushed it. Its not always easy to judge force when stressed and afraid.

Ameliablue · 23/08/2017 07:50

Was the dog actually biting, breaking skin, drawing blood or was it over excited mouthing?

JeNeSuisPasVotreMiel · 23/08/2017 08:08

The dog was ATTACKING HER FACE for goodness sake.
I would have thrown the dog into next week, never mind pushed it off the sofa.

You have my utmost sympathies OP. I have a dog but behaviour like this is intolerable. Unfortunately your boyfriend is enabling it and it's not only humiliating for you but also potentially dangerous.

He is showing you a complete lack of respect by allowing the dog to behave like this.

I would get rid, it's not worth being in a relationship where your needs and dignity aren't respected.

LakieLady · 23/08/2017 08:12

That dog has serious issues and imo it'll take a skilled behaviourist to sort it. Having said that, I'd be surprised if BF had the maturity to follow the behaviourist's advice.

Some people just shouldn't be allowed to have dogs imo. LTB.

TheSolitaryBoojum · 23/08/2017 08:12

After 2 years, he's still not sure whether you dislike his dog? He's an arse with a poorly-trained dog who doesn't respect you. Dump him.
No, it's not the dog's fault it's a PITA, but I wouldn't have lasted a week. Whatever the amazing compensations dp might have to offer.

JeNeSuisPasVotreMiel · 23/08/2017 08:13

Was the dog actually biting, breaking skin, drawing blood or was it over excited mouthing?

I can't believe I'm reading this. If this was a child we were talking about being attacked in this way, I wonder how many of you would be crying bully at the OP.
Does an animal seriously have to draw blood before someone can react against it?

PowerPantsRule · 23/08/2017 08:13

Only on Mumsnet would a woman be bollocked for pushing a dog off a sofa WHEN IT IS TRYING TO BITE HER. Dear God.

I think it depends how much you like this bloke. If you like him - cards on the table - either the dog gets trained or I leave.

mrsjezzabell · 23/08/2017 08:15

YANBU. I am a dog owner and would be mortified if my dog behaved like this. There is nothing worse than going round to someone's house and getting jumped on and slobbered on by an annoying dog, never mind being bit as well. I don't know how you have put up with it this long. And yes the owner is responsible for the dog's behaviour.

ShatnersWig · 23/08/2017 08:22

TWO YEARS???? Why the fuck have you allowed this to continue that length of time. Bloody madness. You must have known long, long ago this dog was driving you nuts and he was doing nothing about it.

OliviaStabler · 23/08/2017 08:26

Walk away. He has a dog but clearly never trained it and sees nothing wrong, just finding its dangerous behavior 'funny'. He has no care for your safety, your belongings etc.

Ameliablue · 23/08/2017 08:26

If the dog was actually aggressively biting everytime she visited would she really keep going back for 2 years and she would be covered in scars. Seriously who among you would put up with that more than once or twice.

NotTheCoolMum · 23/08/2017 08:26

Pushing a healthy active dog off a normal height sofa is no big deal, it's not like they are made of glass.

If the dog was elderly or the sofa was strangely high then maybe a bit U.

The way someone treats their animals speaks volumes about how they really are as human beings. A badly behaved dog would be a huge red flag for me. Get rid OP.

mcpound · 23/08/2017 08:28

Yep I'd seriously consider whether you want to be with this guy. His non action in controlling his dog is disrespectful to you.
I have a dog that's a bit full on. I think he's adorable but I don't want him bouncing all over people annoying them so he goes in the garden if he can't behave. Standing there laughing while the dog destroys your property is just not on at all!

RadioGaGoo · 23/08/2017 08:36

I've given a dog a hard push away or off something when it has been snapping at me. If the owner is not doing something to stop it, why shouldn't I? Maybe if it was pushed more, it wouldn't attack. Interested to know what some of these dog obsessed posters would do. Get up and walk away? The OP said it tries to bite her hands and knees. She's even asked the useless owner, who stands by and does nothing. As far as I can see, she did the right thing to protect herself. The OP has clearly done nothing wrong and I would do exactly the same if continually attacked by a dog.

And don't tell me I shouldn't be around dogs. That's nonsense. I wouldn't go around pushing dogs that don't attack me.

Pollypudding · 23/08/2017 08:37

LTB and LTD

villainousbroodmare · 23/08/2017 08:39

Dump him immediately and stop annoying yourself.

smurfit · 23/08/2017 08:41

I would break up with someone who didn't like my dog so I think it's perfectly legitimate to do the same in reverse. I would probably also break up with someone if their dog didn't like mine.

IDoDaChaCha · 23/08/2017 08:44

Cessj my exDH was like this with our dog. I got rid of DH Grin

justilou1 · 23/08/2017 08:45

The dog is an arsehole. They take after their owners.

Velvian · 23/08/2017 08:51

LTB & it is totally acceptable to push a dog that is attacking you. Don't listen to the fools saying "you are clearly not a dog person". So many people have fur babies now & have no idea how to train dogs, they are not "dog people"

WizardOfToss · 23/08/2017 08:55

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

IDoDaChaCha · 23/08/2017 08:55

OP your DP has no respect for you and echoing the comments of PPs is a manchild. I do feel sorry for the dog, it needs training DP is too childish, lazy and selfish to provide. You could either arrange to meet him in a no dogs allowed space and give an ultimatum of: train the dog or I walk away. Or you could just end it. Personally I'd just end it. He doesn't sound as though he has a responsible bone in his body. You'll be carrying him for the rest of your lives, never mind the dog.

misshannah · 23/08/2017 08:56

It's not the dogs fault, it's the training. Have you thought about going to training classes together? That way when you visit the dog knows boundaries and can meet you in a positive manner and your DP is encouraged to train the dog appropriately and see the handbag emptying, biting, etc as destructive behavior not as funny? How is the dog with other dogs? That said i wouldn't stick and i really don't agree with pushing a dog off the sofa. Encouraging yes and reinforcing good behavior with treats.

everybodysang · 23/08/2017 08:56

I knew there'd be people who'd immediately start whining about the dog being pushed off the sofa. There's always some fuckwit ready to yap up about "it's not the dog, it's the owner."

That being said, dump the owner.

ArcheryAnnie · 23/08/2017 08:57

The dog isn't the problem, the partner is the problem. He sees that something (his dog's behaviour) is upsetting you and laughs.

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