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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

This situation

515 replies

Letstryagainshallwe · 21/08/2017 21:28

I went out with my friend on Saturday night. Rare for me as I hardly ever go out. We went to a club had a good time then got to her car and she had a parking ticket. She was pissed off and moaning about how it's unfair that she has to pay out and none of us do as none of us drive except her (there was 4 of us out.) we get in the car and her sister suggests that we all pay some of it spilt between us. I said I couldn't as I don't have the money to pay out and it's not my fault she parked where she shouldn't have anyway she went ballistic! Because I refused. And kicked me out of her car at 4am in the middle of the street. Literally stopped the car in the middle of the road and told me to get out. I was miles from home and had to get out and ended up having to call a cab to pick me up. I haven't spoken to her since. Wibu for not contributing?

OP posts:
Slowcookerheaven · 22/08/2017 18:58

For the record. I didn't fight with the man. I just put him out. Stopped the car, got out, walked to the passenger door. Opened it and said out. Now.

Slammed the door. Back into the car and drove home.

IneedaMagnum · 22/08/2017 19:00

You're my hero Slow. Good on you!

user1471598890 · 22/08/2017 19:00

Just had to say I can't believe the responses you are getting on here. Of course ywnbu if she parked illegally she should pay the fine. I do think it would have been nice if you all chipped in for petrol money though. Kicked you out the car at 4am is completely unreasonable. You are better off with a "friend" like that!

Slowcookerheaven · 22/08/2017 19:01

I'm glad to know I was so unreasonable. It suits my bitch image.

😂

dustarr73 · 22/08/2017 20:01

User they had chipped in for petrol.And who ever gave a list for what a new car costs, nobody cares.
You get a new car, you're responsible for it's upkeep.

And either give a lift because you want to; and not for what you can get out of people.

purpledonkey · 22/08/2017 20:01

It depends on the circumstances. If she parked illegally by choice and decided that herself, she can't expect you to chip in now she's been caught.

If you knew she'd parked illegally and let her do it, you should have chipped in. Not being a driver isn't an excuse - presumably you can read 'no parking' notices etc.

She was a dramatic twat for kicking you out the car and put you in danger. That's bloody unforgivable.

IneedaMagnum · 22/08/2017 20:46

'For what you can get out of people'. Now I've heard it all. It's the driver who is taking advantage of the people they give lifts to is it? Good. Grief.

IneedaMagnum · 22/08/2017 20:47

She didn't put anyone in danger. She just didn't put up with someone being an absolute bellend in her car, as is her right. If the OP doesn't like it she can get her own car.

mummmy2017 · 22/08/2017 21:10

At no point ever is it right to chuck a woman out of a car at 4am in the morning.
Anyone who thinks this is ok, has a screw lose.
What ever they were arguing about does not alter the fact that it is spiteful, vindictive and shows you up to be a massive cow.
The drivers life was not in danger for the OP. She should have driven her the 2 ish miles which at 30 mph would have taken 4 mins of her time.
To put money over a persons safety will always show just how little compassion you have.

SolomanDaisy · 22/08/2017 21:10

You don't see any danger in a woman on her own in the middle of night, miles from home, presumably a bit drunk?

IneedaMagnum · 22/08/2017 21:15

The only person who put money over her own safety is the OP. And no I don't think someone making their own way home at 4am slightly drunk is that unsafe. I've done it many times myself and if the OP was so concerned for her safety then maybe rather than blaming the world and their dog she should take some responsibility. She had a lift. She blew it. She then had to take an uber. Hardly any pearl clutching required.

IneedaMagnum · 22/08/2017 21:20

Honestly, you could turn absolutely everything around on the person doing the kindness. E.g. a painstaking relative who's been staying at your house for weeks but doesn't want to contribute - if they get thrown out on the street, is it then the relative's fault that the pisstaker hasn't got anywhere else to go? So many examples I could give, all proving that no good deed goes in.

IneedaMagnum · 22/08/2017 21:20

Painstaking = pisstaking...

mummmy2017 · 22/08/2017 21:21

IneedaMagnum
Your darling Daughter is in my car coming home from a pop concert at 4 in the morning she is 14 and won't pay her share of my parking fine, I put her out just over 2 miles from your house and drive off.
Your OK with this as she should have paid me the cash.
Pleased be honest....

IneedaMagnum · 22/08/2017 21:21

Argh 'no good deed goes unpunished'. Stupid phone.

IneedaMagnum · 22/08/2017 21:23

You cant compare a minor to an adult. If she was 18 then no of course I wouldn't be annoyed with anyone but her for being an irresponsible idiot. But it wouldn't happen anyway as I would bring up my DC to be grateful when someone does them a favour.

mummmy2017 · 22/08/2017 21:26

But how is someone frighten and alone any different to an adult or a child.
It was only an extra 5 mins to the drive, your child comes home frightened as so bloke tried to chat her up at 4 in the morning....

IneedaMagnum · 22/08/2017 21:28

You can expect an adult to take responsibility for themselves but a child to a lesser extent. Or do you think all adults should be treated like irresponsible children? Then the driver is also not responsible for her actions. No one is. Maybe I won't pay my mortgage as I don't want to. Try a better example.

mummmy2017 · 22/08/2017 21:37

So at which exact point in time can I kick your DD out of my car and it is ok.
Would that be the morning of her 16th birthday or her 18th and you won't come round with steam pouring out of your ears for child abuse?

Slowcookerheaven · 22/08/2017 21:48

If you're old enough to go to a club - legally get in - you are old enough to sort your own way home.

And if you can't manage that then you aren't mature enough to go to the club.

HTH

Slowcookerheaven · 22/08/2017 21:50

It's a total non event.

Op slabbering and fell out with friend in car and got an uber home.

Pfft

mummmy2017 · 22/08/2017 21:53

Letstryagainshallwe your ok Slowcookerheaven was in the car with you all the time and was wearing the cloak of invisibility, so while you couldn't see her she was looking after you...

Slowcookerheaven · 22/08/2017 22:01

I have an 18 year old daughter. She can get her own way home. Either lift, or taxi or she phones me.

And if she made with the mouth and had to get a cab home that was ££ because she's a silly wee midden, then that is her problem. And a non event.

CanalTrip · 22/08/2017 22:01

Your action demonstrates how you regard your friend and probably precipitated the end of a friendship waiting to end.

IneedaMagnum · 22/08/2017 22:08

Mummmy bit irrelevant as I wouldn't bring up my DC to be entitled dicks. But yeah what Slow said...