To think this new wave of Gender Reveal a bit crap?

[PoppyH56]

It just seems so impersonal. I think it should be a special moment between just you and your partner if you do find out. The whole popping a balloon in front of your family to screams of delight really makes me cringe. AIBU and a total spoil sport here? 😱

Maisypops: 'Celebrating that your baby does/doesn't have a penis'...because a girl is a non-boy??!! I'm sure you didn't mean this.

I don't think someone is self absorbed for wanting a gender reveal party- seriously people need to get a grip
I didn't have anything like that with my first baby, I didn't even do anything when telling my close relatives and friends I was pregnant because I'd had a previous late miscarriage and frankly was terrified. I was scared and stressed my whole pregnancy and in hindsight wished I had celebrated his pregnancy and birth more.
If we get pregnant again I will for sure be celebrating the next pregnancy as much as I can and if that means I fancy a gender reveal party then so be it! Life is too short to get your knickers in a twist over things like this. The parents are happy to have one and that's all that matters!

And it's still possible to get it wrong, even with scans. We always said we think it's a girl. Around here, many hospitals won't tell you anyway due to both getting it wrong (and being sued) or people aborting babies of the wrong gender.

Whoever it was that said pink/blue used to be reversed for boys/girls, there is actually evidence for it.

One particular example I can think of, is when Queen Elizabeth ii was expecting Prince Charles lots of newspapers printed speculation that she thought she was having a girl because the royal nursery and crib was decorated in a lovely shade of pale blue. There are also a handful of victorian documents IIRC that state similar things, such as diary entries etc. Then as you go back further, there is obviously lots of historical representation of infant children all being dressed in smocks/dresses until the age of 4 ish. For boys, moving onto trousers was called being 'breeched'. You only have to look at historic paintings to see that it appears all the children are girls, when in fact there are probably one or two boys dressed as girls.

I studied this in a class at Uni called 'Historical representations of Sexuality and Gender.' We learned all sorts of stuff like this.

I told the girls at work with a tonne of pink sweets - took them ages to work out why I'd taken them bags and bags of marshmallows and strawberry laces 😂

It wouldn't be my cup of tea for a variety of reasons already mentioned. One thing I couldn't handle is a random cake baker knowing the sex (yes SEX) of my child before I did! WTF is that all about? Like others I do feel more cautious about those sorts of celebrations but personal experience of multiple loss has brought that wariness. I had a baby shower when I adopted my children (except one wasn't a baby lol). It was nice to have a celebration because it has to be more low key once they arrive. I'm fairly live and let live. If a friend wanted to do a reveal then that's their choice but I keep my celebrations until there is a safe arrival. I don't care whether it's pink or blue as long as it's healthy and arrives safely. I find it a bit odd giving presents before the birth as I'm then left not knowing whether I then buy another gift once the baby has arrived. I hate doing a first visit without a present. It's all so confusing .

Three, re baby showers and gifts etc;

I've only ever been to one baby shower; it was for a very good friend who did NOT organise the shower for herself. It was another friend who surprised her with it. It was actually quite lovely - no games or anything.

Anyway, yes I bought gifts for the mother at the shower (really nice recipe book she wanted and a memory book thing for her pregnancy and early days with the baby. I then bought gifts for the baby when I first met her. If I hadn't known her as well as I do I'd probably not have gone to the shower, so wouldn't have been an issue with the gifts.

I've never even heard of this!! I found out gender for all 3 of my kids and told anyone who was interested, but not en mass and there was definitely no balloon popping. Each to their own, but it's seems a bit much.

YANBU!!! Hate seeing them, grinds my gears!
If there was no social media, a lot of these faux occasions wouldn't be happening. People do things to put on social media these days, tacky.

I find them extremely distasteful...hey, let's talk about the shape of my fetus' genitals!...it just doesn't seem nice to me. I'm a uni lecturer and about a quarter of my students are swapping their genders, anyway...maybe I'm a cynical old cow, but I don't think YABU.

What the blinking hell is this madness? Sounds freaking weird. Don't do it young people! Enjoy the moment, life, babies, happiness, save your money!

Gives me the rage: boy or girl, those are the possibilities. Any surprises regarding gender are likely to be unwelcome.

A friend of mine had one recently, I attended thinking I would hate it but it was actually quite nice seeing how happy they were when they found it. I did find it odd though because surely the reaction would be the same no matter what you were having? And also, literally nobody cares what sex your baby is.

I didn't take a gift either, it didn't even cross my mind.

The only baby shower I've been to (compulsory family affair) was a hideously gendered affair, all pink princess crap, pink drinks, pink cake, pink pink pink.

He turned out to be a boy. I definitely didn't when I heard.

Yep just don't get it 🤷🏼‍♀️

YANBU, it is grotesque.

Babyshowers/gender reveal/cake smash etc are all a bit cheesy IMO but each to their own. I watched an episode of 'yummy mummys' the other day. This is exactly what I expect on that sort of show!

YANBU!

Each to their own I suppose.

It's very tiresome. I feel as if I am constantly being forced to be the audience for someone's performance of their lives for Facebook, Instagram, YouTube and so on.

I hate social media, so none of the Facebook blah blah is a problem for me. Maybe that's why I have a bit more of a meh attitude to this.

I thought I'd hate baby showers, but my lovely friend's was really nice. Don't know if it went on Facebook etc. Maybe someone else was sitting on their phone thinking "what a performance" !

Obviously Mumsnet doesn't count. It's my only social media type thingy.

I did find it odd though because surely the reaction would be the same no matter what you were having?

You would hope. I think it's just an excuse to get publicly excited over whether to buy frilly pink dresses or smart blue sailor suits - I am surprised at how many of my friends have stuck to these stereotypes.

Decaff I think you've hit the nail on the head... This is in the main an oversharing on social media issue and then partly a gender stereotyping issue. The first is completely avoidable (by deleting FB, insta accounts etc.) and the latter is a societal feminist issue that we all know needs working on. I don't think most people who hold these parties have their eyes open on either of these counts and need gentle education, not beating with a stick!

See my previous post of countering my BIL's response to our recent sarcastic quote marks "gender reveal" - he sent a pink princess emoji, I replied with a female scientist and a female engineer emoji. Gentle banter and food for thought, hopefully! (And also very outing for me if any of my IL's on that whatsapp group are on MN!)

We had a gender reveal .... when we announced the birth!!

Partly because friends did "find out" from he 20 week scan & were told the wrong sex!!!

Nothing is guaranteed until the baby is in your arms. I don't get why spoil things?