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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to be annoyed with this topless lady?

581 replies

user3785022135267845922 · 18/08/2017 13:09

... we r on holiday in a family resort in sunny country. There is a lady who keeps ending up on the sun loungers opposite us, who seems to enjoy lying topless by the pool everyday. She has a DS who looks about 15, and a DD who looks about 5.

I think it's really inappropriate to sunbathe topless on a family resort in full view of everyone and right by the toddler pool, and with her own DS around. Am I being unreasonable in feeling uncomfortable and wishing she'd cover up?? Smile

OP posts:
fluffiphlox · 19/08/2017 16:36

Men are such weak creatures aren't they? Grin

MaisyPops · 19/08/2017 16:37

Breasts are not inherently sexual. I don't get the moral outrage.

Most people find faces attractive, let's cover all faces.
Some people are legs people, let's cover legs.
Some people like bums, so let's ban bikini bottoms in case they corrupt children.
Hair can flick and swoosh in a way that might be flirty or generate sexual tension, let's make everyone tie their hair up.

... or we could just accept that the human body is the human body and chill the fuck out.

RebelRogue · 19/08/2017 16:40

@userwhats'syournumber If your OH pays to see breasts and is so easily distracter ,then he (and you) have a problem, and that problem is not topless women.

GladAllOver · 19/08/2017 16:43

At the risk of putting off the advertisers (today's Times refers), I have to say that some of the posts on here feel like we have a fucked-up society that has such a distorted, twisted view of the human body.

My breasts, like my elbows and feet, are not dirty, disgusting, inappropriate or in any other way requiring to be hidden from public view when I choose to show them.

VeryCunningStunt · 19/08/2017 16:54

I'm understanding that everyone has there own views but come on when there's young kids???? Why would that be ok for them to see

Please provide one well-reasoned point in support of it not being ok for a child to see female breasts.

What will happen to s child who sees a breast? Something utterly horrific, such as them growing up with the opinion that the female body is not a shameful thing?

PugOnToast · 19/08/2017 16:54

I have put on loads of weight in the last year. DH has made it clear he doesn't like it. This year I thought "fuck you all and your ideal of the body beautiful" and wore little bikinis and went top less.

My body. My business. I feel I am worth more than societies idea of beauty and men's opinions.

VeryCunningStunt · 19/08/2017 16:57

So it's ok for children to see unclothed adults??

Again, please could you explain why it is not ok for a child to see a naked human body?

Jaimx86 · 19/08/2017 16:58

Good for you, toast. I bet you looked fab!

Bitlost · 19/08/2017 16:59

YRBU. They're breasts. That's all. I have no more of a problem with topless women on the beach than I have with mums breastfeeding in public. And neither should you.

MaisyPops · 19/08/2017 17:01

VeryCunningStunt
Because the existence of any naked flesh is going to corrupt the minds of children and turn any adult in the area into some horny sex crazed pest. Grin

After all, perfume adverts on primetime tv that are a little suggestive wont corrupt children but seeing adults being comfortbale in themselves in a non sexual.way is just too far.

squoosh · 19/08/2017 17:01

I'm agog at the amount of neo-Victorians on this thread.

fluffiphlox · 19/08/2017 17:02

It's for threads like this that I would really like a 'like' button. And the opposite.

GladAllOver · 19/08/2017 17:04

It's for threads like this that I would really like a 'like' button. And the opposite.
Some would prefer a "hide" button. :)

fluffiphlox · 19/08/2017 17:07
Grin
Bluntness100 · 19/08/2017 17:50

I'm a little on the fence on this one, on one side I've done it myself, I have no issue with it, but st a family resort where you're continuously the only person, I do kind of idly wonder about someone who does.

I remember one lady in the same scenario doing it, she went eveywhere topless, from sitting endlessly at rhe side of rhe pool, to going to the bar, walking round and I found myself curious. She wasn't exhibitionist, but I did idly wonder where you get the confidence to not care to that level.

So I can't say I'd be bothered more curious as to the woman's personality and her confidence.

JacquesHammer · 19/08/2017 18:50

Men pay for women to get their tits and your hubby is getting a freebie! no one here can honestly say they would be happy to spend 2 weeks with a topless women distracting your other half! All your femanist opinions would be forgotten about whilst you try to get your DHs attention bacK

I am actually cringing for you. If your other half gets distracted by a pair of breasts there's something wrong with him.

Why is it a woman's responsibility to dress "appropriately for the menz"?

VeryCunningStunt · 19/08/2017 19:52

I'm so embarrassed for you. And your dh sounds vile

I agree, on both counts. I can only hope that post is a wind up. If not, it's thoroughly depressing that there's a woman out there who genuinely holds those beliefs about men and their behaviour around women's bodies.

If ever there was an individual desperately in need of a feminist intervention, it's a woman who happily states that men 'buy' tits [still not sure I fully understand this: is it drawing the well-worn analogy between marriage and prostitution, or does her husband actually pay women so he can feel them up?], who believes all men turn into rabid dribbling pervs when confronted with breasts, and that deluded 'femanists' [sic] have to abandon their silly principles in order to claw back the Neanderthal's attention.

Got to be a wind up. No woman alive would spout such drivel, would she?

Gertiegoolash · 19/08/2017 19:55

They're a pair of tits, get over it.

MehMehAndMeh · 19/08/2017 19:58

YANBU you didn't opt for a nudist beach so why should you be faced with someones disgusting floppy bits.

GladAllOver · 19/08/2017 20:02

MehMeh
Could you please explain why you think breasts are disgusting?
I would really like to know.

VeryCunningStunt · 19/08/2017 20:05

Could you please explain why you think breasts are disgusting?

I doubt you'll get an articulate response, but I'm happy to be proven wrong on this Wink

JacquesHammer · 19/08/2017 20:07

YANBU you didn't opt for a nudist beach so why should you be faced with someones disgusting floppy bits

So you think men topless is "disgusting" or is that something you reserve for breasts?

Crikey the hard of thinking brigade are out en masse

Willow2017 · 19/08/2017 20:09

Mehmeh

OP is staying where topless sunbathing is obviously allowed and normal. Should everyone at the resort cover up cos it offends her eyes?

Why are breasts 'disgusting'?

VeryCunningStunt · 19/08/2017 20:10

Crikey the hard of thinking brigade are out en masse

I was just about to ask who beamed the 'goady fucker' symbol into the sky Grin

MehMehAndMeh · 19/08/2017 20:15

Men going topless is also disgusting. I do not like my eyes being assaulted by unrequested nakedness thank you very much.