6yo playing out until 10pm

[eatmytoast]

I don't think IABU but this is not sitting right with me.

I live on a new build estate, my house is right at the start of the development.

There is a boy aged 6 who lives at the furthest back end of the development, however, he is playing outside at our end until 9.30 ish most nights, last night it was 10pm!

There is absolutely no way that his mum can see him from her house, he is completely unsupervised.
I would say it's safe enough apart from cars but surely not for a 6 year old?

If his parents definitely can't see him and if there's no other neighbour keeping an eye out that's a real concern. Especially as it's dark now by ten

It wouldn't bother me if someone had an eye out though and it's a safe area.

Why the f* is the kid even awake? Don't even get me started on the whole 'playing out' business. It's just a euphemism for 'it's neglect but nobody cares because the kids are lower class'. I see this all the time on my SILs housing development. It's insane.

That's the thing, nobody is watching him.
He is playing with 2 other lads, they look to be around 9

I almost feel like I need to keep checking on him. He rides his bike in the road with no helmet and cars do come whizzing round the corner, it scares me to death!!

I'd find that a bit worrying. Is he playing on his own, or is he with older kids? Either way, I personally don't think a six-year-old should be out until 10pm if he is out of sight of his parents.

If it was a group of kids who were all close in age, playing out together within view of their parents' houses, I might think it was OK for them to be out while it was still light now and again during the summer holidays, but I'd expect parents to get them in when it started to get dark.

Dina - it's causing no end of trouble and tantrums in my house as my DS can't understand why he has to be in bed whilst a child a year younger is playing out still.
Your right, it is neglect.

Agreed Dina.

Absolutely no one I knows allows their children to "play out".

We take them to the park, we stay in the park whilst they roam but we always know where they are. 7 and 4.

This was also going on before the holidays began. On a school night he was out until 8.30/9 most nights

can't imagine what his parents are thinking of. Anything could happen. Mine didn't play out until much older. And then not at 10pm!

Don't even get me started on the whole 'playing out' business. It's just a euphemism for 'it's neglect but nobody cares because the kids are lower class'.

There are loads of situations where kids playing out in the street has absolutely nothing to do with neglect whatsoever. My parents live in a fairly middle-class, leafy cul-de-sac and the children who live there are always out on bikes or scooters at weekends and during the holidays. Their parents can and do easily check on them by simply looking out of the window. They all play nicely together, get loads of exercise and fresh air, and get called in for their tea exactly as I did when I was a child.

The situation the OP describes is clearly very different from and yes, it's a worry, but if you think all 'playing out' is neglect and/or only happens in a particular class demographic then you are very much mistaken.

Playing out is neglect now?

Who are the 9 year olds to the boy op? If they are brothers they probably are checking in with mum and dad.

My young kids 'play out' on our street or at the park, on their own or with friends, but not past 6pm & mainly only during the summer holidays.

10pm for a 6 year old - something's surely up at home - I'd report 'consistent lack of proper supervision'. This definitely falls under neglect.

To be honest, mine will never, ever, never "play out" gone 6pm. And I will allow them to go off with friends (alone when they are in last year of primary school.

It's neglectful parenting. We live in a different world to the fifties, mainly the astronomical increase in traffic and speed of cars.

So much to say on this but ultimately it's never going to chnage the mind of those that do allow their children to "play out"

Actually Polly, I agree. I didn't want to flag that up but it's nothing to do with the kids being poor, it's a very "naice" housing development in a good area.

But I do agree with the fact it's neglect though.

I used to be playing out when I was younger, not til 10pm but we lived on a cul de sac and my parents could easily see us.

Meld

Genuine question. Are you not constantly a bit anxious knowing that your young children are outside, under no adult's care whatsoever. As I say, genuine question.

Not outside in the garden but outside on public roads etc

Some hysteria on this thread I see.

Yabu if you think kids 'playing out' is neglectful in genera. In this case of a 6 year old boy being out until 10pm, yanbu to think he's being neglected.

Butthole - playing out is not neglect.
Playing out until 10pm unsupervised, at 6 years old, out of sight of mum, is.

The other 2 boys are not brothers, I know their mum and they live just around the corner

Yes I would use the term "neglectful"

I can't say I always enjoy being on the park with my two. Would often much prefer to be at home, sorting bits out and enjoying a coffee. I do it because to not do it would be neglectful parenting.

note: said park is a stone's throw away.

Since when is children playing out, 'lower class'. People with class let their children have balanced childhoods, with plenty of fresh air, exercise and space and time to just play.

You sound nosey and a bit interfering OP.
The boy knows the older boys I presume and his mum his happy with it so that's all there's is to it.

I think that's on the extreme end of the scale. But up our very nice, country cul-de-sac it's common to see 4/5year olds playing out until 7/8pm on nice days. Usually surrounded by 'mother hen' type older kids and the parents popping in and out keeping an eye. Not neglect at all.

Have to pipe up here. "Playing out" is not neglectful if a parent or carer is keeping an eye out. What utter bullshit I read here sometimes

Playing out does not constitute neglect! In this instance, allowing a 6 year old child out at 10pm is completely different to some children playing on a Saturday afternoon (and at that age, our parents took it in turns to be out having cuppas in the front garden watching us)