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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

With my first world problem-beach hut issue.

349 replies

LesleyKnopeIsdope · 15/08/2017 11:05

We've been on the waiting list for a beach for for ages.

A new set are being built and we've been successful in securing a great one.

We were going to buy but I've had to put a hold on it for the following reasons-

I was trying to -using the square footage/floor plans - plan where storage stuff and table/mini kitchen would go etc and asked DH for his help

He's basically dismissed everything and told me that his kayack is going in and that everything else will have to fit around it.

His kayak will only fit it its diagonal and he's refusing to have is hing from the ceiling (which means everyone will have to bend anyway to avoid concussion - there's no permission granted for lockable storage under either.

I asked him is he'd also maintain /paint do essential repairs as he does nothing at home-answer- no im happy just to have somewhere for a kettle and a kayack. No consideration for anyone else or anyone else's enjoyment of it.

I've told him I'm withdrawing from it then- which he's having a huge strop.

I already do every shred of maintencance/work/upkeep on our home he helps with nothing- he has a home office which looks like he's Mr Trebus's protégée ND can just see myself wishing I'd not bothered.

Am I being unreasonable to withdraw (and think £18k for a kayack storage facility because DH is too fucking lazy to take his out of the shed and onto the car) and look elsewhere for myself and he kids?

[edited to correct copy and paste errors at OP's request]

OP posts:
Thread gallery
16
daisychain01 · 15/08/2017 12:51

It sounds like you have serious problems with your relationship. You don't sound like you either like or respect him.

Why invest in something significant for 18 K when you need to get your relationship sorted out first. Priorities and all that.

ItsAllGoingToBeFine · 15/08/2017 12:52

OP you said the rules were quite strict - are you allowed to permanently store large valuable items of sports equipment in them? Will your insurance cover the kayak in the hut etc?

HappyCrazyTired · 15/08/2017 12:57

Buy the beach hut,make friends with the neighbours and I'm sure he'll soon have beach hut envy when they're having party's/barbecues etc and you're all sat round his kayak drinking cup a soups 😂

BarbaraofSevillle · 15/08/2017 12:58

I think some men genuinely do think that doing the wifework is as fulfilling and rewarding for women as the cycling, kayaking, etc is for them

I once saw a comment on Facebook confirming this. I didn't know the man, it was a friend of a friend thing.

He basically said about his wife that 'she was allowed to have a cleaner if he was allowed a new mountain bike' Shock. So in his mind, cleaning their home was totally her responsibility and spending any money on it had to come from her disposable income alone. Hmm.

ohnotyouagain · 15/08/2017 12:59

Wow OP he sounds like such an arse. This has actually made me angry for you, how annoying! You need to get that beach hut in your name if possible and if he does insist in putting the kayak in, that really would be relationship ending for me, it's just selfish.

milliemolliemou · 15/08/2017 12:59

I would go ahead. You won't get to the top of the list again in a hurry and it'll be worth more if you can keep it looking beautiful for rental.

Investigate a pulley/cradle system for the 5 times a year kayak but also local storage costs.

Find out if you can rent yours out and how much it would be worth. In some areas it's £50 a day - especially if you team up for the weeks you can spare with a guest house/hotel: the business proposition PPs have mentioned.

Can you point this out to DH? or consult one of his friends and ask him to deal with DH?

But your DH does sound hugely self-centred and unkind. How would you be set financially if you broke up?

Deux · 15/08/2017 13:04

Please don't put the beach hut on hold. That'd be just cutting off your nose to spite your face. Go ahead with it and deal with the kayak later.

As a PP said you just need to shout louder and get your voice heard. It would be lovely to keep in your family and have further down the line for grandchildren too. It's for the family, not just him.

Don't let him do this to you.

Check the insurance status as he may become unwilling to leave it there if it's not covered.

Alternatively, get someone else to help you take it outside when you visit then accidentally forget to put it back in. Smile

PandorasXbox · 15/08/2017 13:10

Ditch him and buy the hut. It's the only way.

Ta1kinPeece · 15/08/2017 13:14

I have various friends with beach huts.
£18k is a bargain.
Get the beach hut.
Cut the kayak in half and set it up as ears on the roof.
Enjoy your summers with your kids.

Choccyhobnob · 15/08/2017 13:15

Arrgh this thread is making me so angry!

My DH often has ideas like this which aren't malicious he just doesn't think things through/doesn't believe me when I say things will fit/won't fit etc and is useless at practical stuff too.

I would be buying the beach hut, letting him take the kayak down there and literally showing him the issue. Surely once he sees the problem he would agree it had to be kept elsewhere? The boat yard storage sounds like a promising idea.

squirtymcsquirterson · 15/08/2017 13:18

Having read all these posts now have decided what you are going to do OP? Or what you think the next move should be?

dinkystinky · 15/08/2017 13:24

OP - your husband is a twat. The beach hut is for family use - not for a fibreglass kayak!! He bought the thing for only him to use - he has to store it and move it around. The beach hut is for the family to use - everything that goes in there is something that will benefit the family. Period.

Buy the beach hut, enjoy it and ignore your idiot of a husband.

BreakfastAtSquiffanys · 15/08/2017 13:24

#PropKayak
Grin

Brittbugs80 · 15/08/2017 13:25

No! Don't withdraw, a beach but would be so lovely to have. A small stove, comfy chairs, books etc and a place to change.

How does the Kayak normally get to the beach? If it's on top of the car, I'd say it can carry on that way.

Which part of the coast are you on?

AnnPerkins · 15/08/2017 13:34

OP, I hate your husband.

Also, the word kayak has lost all meaning after reading it 124 times in this thread.

LaurieFairyCake · 15/08/2017 13:39

Get the hut.

If he's a dick dump him.

Get the hut in the divorce.

AcrossthePond55 · 15/08/2017 13:49

As far as you being able to move it, there are dollies that you can slide under and attach with a strap. Makes heavy things easy to pull. DH flies hang gliders and I can't move them normally, but I can with a dolly. Would something like that work as a compromise? He can have his (stupid fucking) kayak, but you'd be able to move it when you and DC make solo trips.

www.google.com/search?q=kayak+dolly&client=safari&rls=en&tbm=isch&source=lnms&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwjGp8_oodnVAhUB1mMKHUNQA9YQ_AUIggIoAQ&biw=1024&bih=551

Witsender · 15/08/2017 13:54

Cock.

We only live about 2 miles away from our nearest beach but I would still love a beach hut. DH thinks I'm mad.

What would he do if you got the hut and just built it as you want? Completely cutting him out of the equation?

DameDiazepamTheDramaQueen · 15/08/2017 13:55

Why won't he hang it from the ceiling?Confused knob

Alanna1 · 15/08/2017 14:01

Well... I'd buy it. Kit it out with mine and the kids stuff. But not give him a key! (Or get him an inflatable kayak).

OVienna · 15/08/2017 14:01

AnnPerkins Tue 15-Aug-17 13:34:14

OP, I hate your husband.

That made me laugh. We're all thinking it though!

(WHere is the Daily Mail when you need it???/)

StaplesCorner · 15/08/2017 14:01

Having read all these posts now have decided what you are going to do OP? Or what you think the next move should be?

^
this.

OP: We can't keep posting "blimey he's a selfish tosser" for 10 pages and you just come on every 20 messages or so and say "yes he really really is" - now we're ALL in agreement, what's your plan?

MurielsBottom · 15/08/2017 14:01

I'm sure you can get a little trolley on wheels that you can just wheel the offending item out on when you use the hut. It does depend in the size and position of the doors but is it not worth considering?
I do wonder what your dh think a beach hut is for as you have obviously got very different ideas.

parklives · 15/08/2017 14:03

I haven't read the whole thread...so sorry if someone has already suggested it.....but I have a genius idea.
Can you go halves with another person on the beach hut, like a friend or a family member (they must not be twats).
Then you can do it up together with them, as long as you had similar tastes and a rota/agreement for who's turn it was to use the hut?
Then you could spend the rest of the money on your bathrooms, and your horrid dp won't be able to have it his selfish way.
I would prefer to share my space (beach hut) with someone who would love and appreciate it the same way i did and help maintain/decorate it too.

DameDiazepamTheDramaQueen · 15/08/2017 14:05

Could you present it to him that it won't be secure enough for his preciois fucking kayak?

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