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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to have a hysterectomy aged 25?

208 replies

Kimberly343 · 13/08/2017 14:57

I have two DCs, I always imagined my life with two children. We live in a 3 bedroomed home with no wish to move and love that the DCs each have their own 'space'. Another DC is definatley off the cards, my second DC was born with a genetic disease that limits their life dramatically so any further children we would either need to pay privatley for PGD IVF or run the risk of another child affected/terminate a pregnancy after testing. All of these would be a great strain on us all.

I spoke to my GP about a hysterectomy as I don't get on well with hormonal contraception, had a coil fall out and have horrendous periods. The GP practically laughed it off and said I am far too young to be considered and I am likely to change my mind. I definatley will not, regardless of my circumstances I 100% don't want any more children, shall I see another GP or am I silly to do this?

OP posts:
CosmicPineapple · 13/08/2017 15:00

Not silly at all.
You have a right to your own body and as you already have DC I think your choice matters.
See another GP. I would.

Aquamarine1029 · 13/08/2017 15:01

Why are you wanting something so extreme when you can simply have your tubes tied? I seriously doubt you would find any doctor who will remove a uterus just because of heavy periods.

Onthehighseas · 13/08/2017 15:03

I dont think you'll find a GP who would refer you for a hysterectomy. There are alternative solutions to your contraceptive needs and your periods that would be better explored.

fruitbats · 13/08/2017 15:03

Why not just get sterilised? You don't need a hysterectomy.

Coconutspongexo · 13/08/2017 15:05

I think it's more the fact that this is elective and i assume you would want this on the NHS? Would you consider sterilisation?

notevernotnevernotnohow · 13/08/2017 15:05

It's not going to happen, so don't even bother thinking about it. No doctor would do that, it's not an option.

youaredeluded · 13/08/2017 15:06

Can your dh look into a vasectomy? It is much easy to recover from and less risk involved than a hysterectomy.

CadnoDrwg · 13/08/2017 15:06

YABU to want a hysterectomy but not a permanent sterilisation.

Hysterectomy operations are major abdominal surgery. They are fraught with risk and significant side effects. You'd struggle to find any surgeon (private or NHS) to agree to the procedure without substantial issues already present.

Being sterilised though I fully agree with. Your body, your choice. I hate this assertion that a man should have the snip if you do not want any more children, if a woman wishes to be sterilised then she should be permitted to.

Persephonebrown · 13/08/2017 15:12

I'm sure op means sterilisation rathan than a hysterectomy? Having a hysterectomy would bring on menapause which I doubt any doc would agree to. I do know that many female sterilisations are refused now as it's far safer for the man to have a vasectomy which is only a 10 min procedure with far less risk of complications.

Birdsgottaf1y · 13/08/2017 15:13

What does your DH say about it, would he consider a vasectomy?

Such an early hysterectomy can cause ongoing issues and put you at risk of health problems, needing to take hormones etc.

Sterilisation would be a better option.

notevernotnevernotnohow · 13/08/2017 15:14

She's not going to get sterilised on the NHS at 25 either.

AlmostAJillSandwich · 13/08/2017 15:14

Sterilisation yes, you should be allowed to choose this, but not a hysterectomy. The uterus actually helps support your bowel and bladder, youd be at higher risk of incontinence issues to have it taken out. That is of course after major abdominal surgery with all the risks associated with it, including post surgical internal adhesions.

To expect it on the NHS on top of all that, no doctor in their right mind would refer you for it, especially for contraceptive rather than actual detrimental health reasons.

LonnyVonnyWilsonFrickett · 13/08/2017 15:15

As someone going through the menopause at 45 - don't do this. You need the hormones. A friend of mine has had a hysterectomy because of a medical issue and has struggled massively too. We're both at high risk of things like oesteoperosis in later life, which my mum has and is literally no fun at all. You don't want to be a 65 year-old woman who is scared to leave the house in winter in case she slips.

A sterilisation is of course a different matter and something you absolutely should be able to choose for yourself, when you want it.

Coconutspongexo · 13/08/2017 15:16

Possibly not on the NHS but she can go private and it's not too expensive, much cheaper than looking after another child for 18 years!

Cocklodger · 13/08/2017 15:16

YANBU to want to be sterilised.
You may have to pay for it privately though

Coconutspongexo · 13/08/2017 15:16

That was for sterilisation not a hysterectomy

VladmirsPoutine · 13/08/2017 15:17

Hysterectomies are largely an enormous surgery procedure. It's really not a case of opening you up and taking out a bit of your uterus just because you've single-mindedly reached the conclusion that you want no further children.

I'm not surprised no doctor wanting to keep their license would have refused you on the back of your wishes.

ghostyslovesheets · 13/08/2017 15:19

yes can't your DP have the snip - far less traumatic

Veterinari · 13/08/2017 15:19

A hysterectomy does not effect your hormones. Hormones are produced by the ovaries which are only removed in an ovariohysterectomy not a hysterectomy. So an early menopause is not a risk.

Besides which I'm pretty sure the OP is talking about sterilisation.

PacificDogwod · 13/08/2017 15:20

As everybody is saying, consider sterilisation rather than hysterectomy.

Either way'd need to be certain that you'd never change their mind (reversal operations are not available on the NHS and even when done privately don't always work).
'Never' is a long time and at 25 you may have another 25 years of fertile life ahead of you.

Why don't you and speak to a Family Planning Clinic about ALL your options?

NB No doctor is going to 'lose their licence' for performing any kind of surgery that is a. indicated and b. has the patient's informed consent.

PacificDogwod · 13/08/2017 15:21

There is some evidence that hysterectomy can trigger easier menopause.
I think even sterilisation can....?

Would have to go and look this up, sorry.

Twinkleheth · 13/08/2017 15:24

My friend was sterilised earlier this year at 24, on the NHS. So, yes, it is possible with a supportive GP.

ittakes2 · 13/08/2017 15:26

If you have this done you will go into early menopause - you hair and skin will thin etc. My poor friend had to have this done and unfort and you could unfort see the affect on her body.
Just get your tubes tied. My sister did this in her 20s. Worth mentioning she did change her mind in her late 30s, but successfully had IVF and a very healthy little boy.

Coconutspongexo · 13/08/2017 15:26

It's not just about having a supportive GP though, funding comes into account.

Sterilisation may be possible, hysterectomy isn't.

Floralnomad · 13/08/2017 15:27

You may be able to get sterilised but I can't see you getting a hysterectomy on the NHS for the reasons you have stated . Thousands of women have horrendous periods , it is not a reason for a hysterectomy .