Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

... to not want my child’s (non serious) accident on TV?

227 replies

CarolinePenvenen · 12/08/2017 17:17

Some years ago we were at a family event and my then 4yo got a whack in the face from another kid during one of the party games. It was a hard whack, she had a black eye and was in a lot of pain and very distressed but it wasn’t serious.

At the time I was told that a (young) family member, let’s call him Raymond, had videoed this incident and wanted to send it to a well known tv show that shows all these mishaps for a laugh, the intention being to make a bit of money out of it. I said no. Was still cross/a bit upset about the incident and generally cheesed off about the idea. They got a bit pissed off about it but no more was said.

Now my dd is 9 and it’s come up again. Basically Raymond sent it in anyway and now they’ve said they want to use it. He’s now also offered dd half the money. I’m still not keen but have left it up to dd to decide and she has said absolutely no, she’s not bothered about the money (and she’s usually very fond of money!). She’s a worrier and a sensitive soul and hates the idea of being laughed at. Family now think we’re massive spoilsports and taking offence where there is none. I should add that I detest this show with a passion although dd has been known to watch it!

If you’ve got to the end of that, AIBU?

OP posts:
notevernotnevernotnohow · 13/08/2017 13:46

No, you don't actually.

notevernotnevernotnohow · 13/08/2017 13:49

You know how papparazzi take photos of people and publish them? They neither have nor need model release forms.

aaaaargghhhhelpme · 13/08/2017 13:51

Ahhh with such a water tight argument like that who could disagree with notever

aaaaargghhhhelpme · 13/08/2017 13:57

Paparazzi come under photo journalist rules

The picture cannot be used to endorse a product and must be taken in a public place where no expectation of privacy can be expected.

And I hate to break it to you - but a lot of paparazzi shots are set up by the publicist and prearranged.

notevernotnevernotnohow · 13/08/2017 13:58

There is a lot more to it, that was just one example.

And I hate to break it to you - but a lot of paparazzi shots are set up by the publicist and prearranged

Couldn't care less and doesn't negate my point in any way.

Findingdotty · 13/08/2017 13:58

YANBU at all. This is about respect and your DD's learning that her opinion and feelings are valid and should be respected by others. No means no in every circumstance.

I second the PP who said you should contact the tv company and explain clearly that you do not give permission to have DD shown and that the other people involved submitted it without your permission. I would be very clear indeed.

aaaaargghhhhelpme · 13/08/2017 14:08

Notever - ok. What are the other examples?

profbadbride · 13/08/2017 14:31

notever, there are exemptions to the DPA for journalism, art and literature. But the exemptions are not absolute: there has to be reasonable justification. I struggle to see what the justification could be in this case.

But I can't see a reputable TV company ignoring a parent's wishes in a situation like this, so the legal talk is moot, IMO

profbadbride · 13/08/2017 14:31

ICO journalism guidelines here: ico.org.uk/media/for-organisations/documents/1552/data-protection-and-journalism-media-guidance.pdf

frieda909 · 13/08/2017 15:52

notever, I'm not an expert but from a conversation I've had with a photographer friend in the past I understand that there are different rules around photography of children, even with paparazzi. I think that's why you see celebrity's children's faces blurred out a lot of the time in paparazzi shots.

Jaxhog · 13/08/2017 16:34

I don't believe any respectable TV programme would agree to show it without your written permission as her parent. She's a minor.

Glad to see that you're respecting her wishes in this. Your relative should do likewise.

coriliavijvaad · 13/08/2017 16:59

Yanbu at all and Raymond's father ought to be having serious words with him about how inappropriate it is to find footage of people getting injured funny.

Slapstick comedy is something else - playacting accidents without anyone getting injured, that can be hilarious. The whole concept of funniness at its most basic is built on situations where you think one thing is happening and it turns out to be something else. Seeing a child getting injured is not funny.

ilovesushi · 13/08/2017 17:19

Not read all the responses, but if you can be bothered ring the production company direct, ask for series producer on the show and categorically state they do not have permission to use it. They can't feature someone who does not give their consent.

Grumpybeforemytime · 13/08/2017 17:22

Absolutely!

Twitchingdog · 13/08/2017 17:22

At the end of day he can stick on you tube and every one can see it anyways .

LilQueenie · 13/08/2017 17:24

yanbu contact the company and make it clear you do not consent. Especially as your child is a minor. Can you threaten the person who wants to send it with legal action?

Grumpybeforemytime · 13/08/2017 17:24

I meant absolutely agree with the responses. YANBU at all

Spellcheck · 13/08/2017 17:25

It doesn't matter what anyone thinks of the programme - if your DD doesn't want it aired and Raymond has the power to make that happen, then her wishes should be respected. It's a moral judgment rather than a legal one. He's probably entitled to air it wherever he likes, but a nice person just wouldn't.

LIZS · 13/08/2017 17:27

Think you would need to sign a media consent form , as she is under 16, before they could use the footage. He may have intellectual property rights but they shouldn't broadcast it otherwise. The fee is a tiny % of what the tv company gains.

yesiamgoingtoeatthat · 13/08/2017 17:29

I work in TV. They need to have a signed consent form for your child in order to be able to show the clip. It is much stricter with children than with adults. If you are concerned that your family are going ahead with this despite your wishes then contact the production company and ask for the production co-ordinator or an assistant producer (it will be harder to get hold of someone higher up the food chain and these are roles with responsibility for release forms). Explain your situation; ask for written confirmation that the clip will not be used without your prior written permission.

I don't blame you at all. If it's a standard release form then the terms will cover 'worldwide, all media, perpetuity' i.e. they have the rights to play it forever with YBF, and possibly to re-sell the clip. I certainly wouldn't sign it on behalf of my child.

iwannaRock1985 · 13/08/2017 17:34

I would say that is a definite no, no no no

DagenhamRoundhouse · 13/08/2017 17:41

What sort of TV prog is showing this sort of thing anyway?

Roversandrhodes · 13/08/2017 17:42

No! This is so wrong ! You are not being unreasonable at all.Shes your child you've said no,she's said no,that should be the end of it .Raymond is a w a n k e r

angelfacecuti75 · 13/08/2017 17:53

Contact the tv show and tell them you don't give them permission to use it as it was done without your consent.

heedee · 13/08/2017 17:54

Not being unreasonable at all. Your daughter doesn't want it to be seen. That should be the end of it. If Raymond does not respect your daughter's wishes then I don't think I would want anymore to do with Raymond Angry

Swipe left for the next trending thread