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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Babies on the tube at 11.30

270 replies

CoughLaughFart · 08/08/2017 23:53

I've just spent 20 minutes on the tube listening to not one, but two babies screaming at top volume. It's nearly midnight! Who is that irresponsible?

OP posts:
BarbaraofSeville · 09/08/2017 11:24

That's interesting Birds about the daylight. Since the days of Franco wanting to suck up to Hitler, Spain has been in the wrong time zone, making it dark in the morning and light late into the evening.

This is probably confounded by siesta time too, making people less tired as they've had a decent daytime nap and it is more pleasant to be up late into the evening as it is not too dark and is a comfortable temperature after the heat of the day. The temperature aspect probably explains late night culture in the middle east too.

Brittbugs80 · 09/08/2017 11:28

Nice attitude. Maybe I shouldn't have reported the domestic abuse going on next door either

Who do you report two babies on the tube to?! I'm assuming the parents/carers were with them?

If you were that concerned, you should have asked the parents/carers what they were playing at. You should have told them that under no circumstances should they be out that late at night. You could have also contacted the transport police to meet them off the train, called social services etc.

Why didn't you?

Or did you realise it's actually not illegal and fuck all to do with you? You don't know them, you don't know their reasons why.

Comparing this to domestic violence is pointless.

You reported the DV I'm guessing, because you heard it/saw it and called the Police. If you felt that the babies were in danger, why not do something? Routine is good for babies but flexibility moreso.

EdmundCleverClogs · 09/08/2017 11:30

I've responded in the exact same way I was spoken to by certain posters.

You've not responded to the actual disagreement of your op though. You've countered with irrelevant points about older children and routines, but apart from that I am yet to see why you still believe you're correct in why parents are wrong to take babies out at night. Especially when you have no idea as to why these families were out so late.

Starting a thread judging parents without good cause, on a parenting forum, will only ever make you read like a goady poster. How exactly did you envisage this thread going?

BarbaraofSeville · 09/08/2017 11:30

Has an extreme or 'out of routine' situation honestly never happened to you before

Some people are very rigid about their routines. I suppose it may be driven by fear - if there have been previous sleeping and feeding problems that the routine appears to have eased, they may be worried about going back to a time when DC wouldn't sleep or eat well.

But having to adhere strictly to a routine does seem very limiting, especially when it leads to everyone having to be at home from the early evening, hence the reference to British parents huddled whispering in tents from 7 pm earlier in this thread, or sitting in the dark in hotel rooms while their DC sleeps from their normal time. If you were able to relax the routine occasionally, you could go out in the evening whether at home or on holiday, should you want to.

Original poster
CoughLaughFart · 09/08/2017 11:31

So you want people to believe you haven't started the thread for goady fucker purposes but refuse to give any other reason.

Why do I have to justify it? Read the opening post!

OP posts:
EdmundCleverClogs · 09/08/2017 11:37

Why do I have to justify it? Read the opening post!

We've all read your op.

No one agrees with it.

Many have made valid points as to why you're wrong about it being 'irresponsible'.

You have made zero counter argument as to why you're right.

Now you seem confused as to why people think you're just stirring instead of just 'disagreeing'.

Do you usually have issues in understanding how you're being rude and argumentative?

Original poster
CoughLaughFart · 09/08/2017 11:38

You don't have to keep coming back.

OP posts:
BarbaraofSeville · 09/08/2017 11:39

Well if someone hase an opinion that most people disagree with, or shows that they haven't thought outside quite a limited set of conditions, it is no surprise that others may think that they are being goady if they don't offer a sensible reason why they think such behaviour is 'irresponsible'.

MrsWhatToDo · 09/08/2017 11:40

This is getting silly now! And truthfully making me laugh.
I've never seen anyone troll their own discussion before! There's no point if you won't actually engage with your own topic!
AYBU for thinking it's irresponsible? YES YABVU.

(The sarky cow in me wants to add 'The End. And They All Lived Happily Ever After!)

Maci · 09/08/2017 11:40

This thread is excruciating!

EdmundCleverClogs · 09/08/2017 11:40

You don't have to keep coming back.

Again, nothing to do with your op. Why start a thread if you don't want anyone questioning your posts? Again I ask, what where you expecting when you started a thread irrationally judging parents on a parenting forum?

Original poster
CoughLaughFart · 09/08/2017 11:42

I've already said I think children need routine. I have no issue with you or anyone disagreeing with that, but I don't have to keep rejustifiying my view.

OP posts:
Sayhellotothemoomoos · 09/08/2017 11:44

Right according to you babies need routine. So let's say they were travelling back from the hospital because someone was sick. What would you suggest?

Original poster
CoughLaughFart · 09/08/2017 11:47

Why start a thread if you don't want anyone questioning your posts?

But all you're doing is beating the same drum again and again. Why?

OP posts:
EdmundCleverClogs · 09/08/2017 11:48

I've already said I think children need routine.

And in this case you're unreasonable. Routine can't always be adhered to, especially with babies as has been explained to you. Even with older children, sometimes things change, it is not 'irresponsible' to sometimes need to be out late at night traveling. There would have been hundreds of children traveling in cars, trains and planes at the same time, are those parents 'irresponsible' as well? Without a reason as to why, you are absolutely in the wrong to be judgmental. Your life must be exhausting if you judge everyone on a tiny snapshot of what they're doing that day.

Sayhellotothemoomoos · 09/08/2017 11:49

No holiday night flights for the ops children.

EdmundCleverClogs · 09/08/2017 11:51

Why?

Why are you arguing with posters about arguing instead of rationally explaining your views on ridged, inflexible routines for babies, and where taking a child out past a certain time is 'irresponsible' regardless of reason?

Sayhellotothemoomoos · 09/08/2017 11:52

Exactly, I think this thread would be wrapped up and end of op explained either the rationale behind her thinking, giving a counter argument for those raised. Or just accepted that she was wrong.

blueskyinmarch · 09/08/2017 11:53

Have you got children OP? If so have you never ever taken them on holiday or to a family gathering where they have stayed up later than usual? It really isn't that out of the ordinary. Especially with a baby who isn't really in any sort of routine anyway.

TeachesOfPeaches · 09/08/2017 11:54

Why didn't you move carriages if it was bothering you?

Valentine2 · 09/08/2017 11:55

You live in a bubble op. There can be a million reasons for them to have those babies there.

demirose87 · 09/08/2017 11:55

Ideally its late so they should really be in bed, but you don't know what was going on, could have been a one off, been an emergency, could have been visiting relatives and been a long day, the list goes on..So I don't think you can judge them as irresponsible on this one occasion

Original poster
CoughLaughFart · 09/08/2017 11:56

Exactly, I think this thread would be wrapped up and end of op explained either the rationale behind her thinking, giving a counter argument for those raised. Or just accepted that she was wrong.

Funny how no one wants to 'wrap up' the thread by not posting anymore.

OP posts:
Sayhellotothemoomoos · 09/08/2017 11:57

But why did you post, then completely refuse to discuss any of the replies?

Do you accept that there are lots of valid reasons for babies being out late?

EdmundCleverClogs · 09/08/2017 11:58

Funny how no one wants to 'wrap up' the thread by not posting anymore.

That's not how forums work, especially AIBU. We don't go away because you don't have the cognitive ability to reason out your opinions and counter others' disagreement of your posts.