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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Babies on the tube at 11.30

270 replies

CoughLaughFart · 08/08/2017 23:53

I've just spent 20 minutes on the tube listening to not one, but two babies screaming at top volume. It's nearly midnight! Who is that irresponsible?

OP posts:
MrsBennettsNerves · 09/08/2017 07:13

All this "school age children" stuff - there are actually plenty of home educated children not tied to school times in any way even in September Shock. If they happen to be the type of child who suits going to bed late and getting up late, and have no need to fit in with school, why not go with what suits them? DS and his cousin are the same age. She goes to bed at 6p.m., so she can get up at 5-something a.m. in the morning to go to before-school care and her parents can go to work early. DS is HE, and goes to bed 2 or 3 hours later, which suits him, as he can get up 2 or 3 hours later. He has HEd friends who stay up even later, as they are proper night owls, or in some cases for something like having a fascination with astronomy so staying up late to stargaze - why not, when you can sleep as long as you need anyway?

PlumpAndPlain · 09/08/2017 07:18

YABU
Love 'darked on' - after having having DD I was discharged from hospital at 9pm. My mum was aghast - 'they're discharging you now? But it's dark!' I don't think my 1 day old was bothered much...

GahBuggerit · 09/08/2017 07:20

Oh op aren't you cute :)

My kids don't have a set bedtime, never have, I don't do routine and I don't care about the very strange obsession with kids having to be at home by a certain time or they turn into pumpkins.

Yabu

StickThatInYourPipe · 09/08/2017 07:23

Why would it matter if a school aged child was on the tube worse their parents at midnight? My parents used to take me to the theatre in London and we would be on the tube at similar times. I also remember our school taking us to see Phantom and we were on the tube around midnight then too.

BoomBoomsCousin · 09/08/2017 07:26

Another reason kids might be on the tube (or a bus) at that time of night, even in September) is homelessness. Parent won't would love to be home with everyone tucked up in bed, but without a home and beds the tube is at least warm and dry. And while the council should house families, things go wrong sometimes. People aren't always capable of accessing all the help they are entitled to. Assignments get made late and placement can be some distance away. Accommodation isn't always suitable. Etc.

Deliberatly aking a screaming baby or a young child on a school night on the tube at nearly midnight for a jolly is not the best parenting. But why assume it's a jolly? Where's the evidence for that? There are thousands of people in London with babies and some of them will not have the most regular situations or lifestyles.

alltouchedout · 09/08/2017 07:27

I know. It's terrible. You should call 101 and get it logged.

Dailystuck71 · 09/08/2017 07:32

DS didn't have a routine. He's 9 now. Still doesn't. Don't get the big issue OP.

You know nothing of the reasons.

Maci · 09/08/2017 07:37

Maybe the babies didn't like the OP.

Original poster
CoughLaughFart · 09/08/2017 07:42

Stop being so goady OP. You asked were YBU and the answer was yes you were. Take it on the chin.

I'm not sure how responding to comments made about me is being 'goady'.

OP posts:
savagehk · 09/08/2017 07:51

Babies don't need a routine. My first naturally developed a 9.30 pm bedtime and my second is doing the same. If we are out and they are tired they sleep. Especially when a baby.

GinIsIn · 09/08/2017 07:55

Might I ask what you hope to gain from this thread if you aren't a goady fucker?

Are you perhaps concerned that the baby might not be in a fit state to operate heavy machinery the next morning?

There are many reasons parents might be on the tube that late with a baby.

  • perhaps the baby is unwell and they are on the way to or from hospital as they can't afford a taxi.
  • perhaps they are on their way to say goodbye to a dying relative.
  • perhaps they've been at a wedding
  • perhaps the baby is Boss Baby and they are on their way to Downing Street for it to take over the country.

It doesn't really matter, and isn't really any of your business.

Andrewofgg · 09/08/2017 07:58

OP: here's a business opportunity for you:

Other people's businesses minded. No job too big, no job too small. Public transport a speciality.

Fossilshavenomemory · 09/08/2017 08:00

"Okay, so what if the child is school age? Surely all the same theories apply. Are you happy for them to be out at this time hours before school?"

It's the school holidays fyi.

What a judgemental post.

coldcanary · 09/08/2017 08:01

I've had to take a tiny screaming baby on public transport late at night before - to urgent care. Fortunately I got no judgemental looks, just concern from fellow (admittedly slightly pissed) passengers about a clearly unwell baby.
Frankly I'd rather she had been tucked up in bed at that time but I'd been advised to get her seen to asap so had no choice.
You have no idea why they were out with a baby late, what did you hope to achieve? Naming and shaming?

Sayhellotothemoomoos · 09/08/2017 08:03

Op you've gone from babies on the tube, to school children on the tube, to domestic abuse?

As everyone has said, there could be any number of perfectly valid reasons why babies were on the tube late at night. Same goes for school children.

Just one example seen as though you don't seem to have much imagination. I've had to take my children out late to the hospital/walk in centre and to pick up prescriptions.

It's a far stretch to go from "none of your business children being out late", to "none of your business about domestic abuse".

AwaywiththePixies27 · 09/08/2017 08:07

it's the whole families including both parents and primary school kids picking up the cornflakes and toilet roll at a ridiculous hour that has me a bit just judgey pants.

Lucked I used to go first thing in the morning to a 24hr shop. DS has ASD and the sensory overload in a supermarket was something I dreaded every time. I also had to take my DD with me because I'm a single parent. Foing first thing minimised his meltdowns/boltoffd and there were less judgeypants about tutting and murmering.
Nowadays I mostly do online shops thank goodness! Much less stressful for all three of us! Smile

OP. I've no idea but they're probably not choosing to travel on public transport at that time of night. Could be on their way home after a shift and picking DC on up on the way. Could be oj their way to a safe house after fleeing DV and that's the only safe time they could move. Could be on their way to taking their DCs on holiday. My friend recently went on holiday. Their flight was at 3am.

Mayvis · 09/08/2017 08:09

It's also the World Athletics Champs in Stratford. Loads of children including babies there. Last race ends around 10pm then there's a slow walk to train station, then long queues to get on the tube/train. I bet there have been thousands of young children on the train/tube late at night this week because of this.

Cheby · 09/08/2017 08:11

Ah the classic:
OP: AIBU?
Everyone else: Yes
OP: No I'm not!

insancerre · 09/08/2017 08:13

It's not about being darked on
Maybe the parent was concerned about being sunned on?

Teutonic · 09/08/2017 08:16

I stand by my comment of its none of your business.
If you find that simplistic, then it's your problem not mine.
I will reiterate what I said earlier....Stop being a Nosey Parker.

You know, if people spent more time minding their own business instead of other people's, we would all be better off.

Springprim · 09/08/2017 08:20

You are extremely judgemental. It's none of your business what people do in regards to children being awake at that time. I've been travelling on the Barcelona metro all week with my family & lots of babies and children are up till midnight & its yeah of course big deal.

Original poster
CoughLaughFart · 09/08/2017 08:27

It's the school holidays fyi.

Yes, thank you; I have heard of August.

OP posts:
Sayhellotothemoomoos · 09/08/2017 08:28

Op, do you accept now that there could have been any number of reasons why the babies were on the tube?

JacquesHammer · 09/08/2017 08:34

Is it that hard to understand that children need routine

Is it that hard to understand that not all children do?

It surely doesn't take an enormous amount of wit as an adult to work out situations where it's desirous you might get involved and ones that truly are not your business?

I suggest calling the village elders. They must put a stop to children being out in the dark.

Original poster
CoughLaughFart · 09/08/2017 08:37

Ah the classic:
OP: AIBU?
Everyone else: Yes
OP: No I'm not!

I don't see the point of these posts. What do people expect - the OP to collapse in tears and beg the Mumsnet jury for forgiveness?

OP posts: