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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Don't want my 2 year old to wear a kilt. AIBU?

524 replies

PinkyPie2012 · 06/08/2017 23:55

We are invited to a Scottish wedding of a family member, my DS will be 2 years old at the time of the wedding. My DH is Scottish, I am not. Bride and groom are insisting all men must wear kilts including children. I personally do not like kilts, they are also not exactly cheap to buy, feels like waste of money to me especially for a toddler who will wear it once and then it is going to be too small. Shouldn't people be allowed to wear whatever they want or can afford to a wedding? AIBU?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
14
Notreallyarsed · 07/08/2017 09:51

CoughLaughFart I'm not feeling dictated to, but your sneery tone and general attitude was uncalled for.

Twistmeandturnme · 07/08/2017 09:54

This business of asking for a penny for the sporran: is this all the children? If so you could make the money you've spent back in the course of the day OP: a double win:
Your DS has fitted in with everyone else, got to wear a special kilt like his Dad, and it's cost you nothing.

PelorusJack · 07/08/2017 09:55

YANBU

I think a dress code for a two year old is silly. I wonder what the responses would have been if your son was asked to wear a suit I'm guessing it would have been 100% YANBU to not make him wear one.

However, whatever you decide should be both you and your DHs decision.

CoughLaughFart · 07/08/2017 09:59

However, this thread has gone completely against the normal run of wedding dress code threads for some reason.

It's the 'but he will look cuuuuute!!!' factor.

DonaldStott · 07/08/2017 10:00

Boot with kilts are sexy and gorgeous

Erm not on a 2 year old!!!

OP, you just sound like you are being obtuse.

Notreallyarsed · 07/08/2017 10:02

Twistmeandturnme its tradition to keep coins in the sporran. It harks back to military men who kept the money as a last ditch bribe in the event of capture. My DS1 came home from my brother's wedding absolutely minted because everyone kept giving him money as they got more pissed!

Findingdotty · 07/08/2017 10:02

Yes, YABU.

ButchyRestingFace · 07/08/2017 10:03

That's a bit OTT isn't it? I don't think expressing a distaste for something means I 'can't handle it'.

So you're saying you have a "distaste" for Scottish people using Scottish English on a thread specifically dealing with Scottish clothing?

Is it just on MN you think it's distasteful not to use the Queen's English at all times? Or is this a general thing?

IWantACheeseburger · 07/08/2017 10:05

YANBU OP.
I'm Scottish but I'm not a fan of kilts and my boys have never worn one.
A dress code for a wedding just seems ott. As long as you are all looking smart surely that's all that matters.

CSLG · 07/08/2017 10:08

I'm Scottish - DH English. DH wore a kilt at our wedding. Dress code was smart but we did put kilt hire details in the invite for those who wanted - all the English men wore them and loved them - so funny to see them all swinging them around. Didn't get invited to any weddings when DS was 2 or he would have been in a wee kilt..

blahdblah · 07/08/2017 10:09

Are you sure the dress code applies to babies and toddlers? because that seems a bit U.

Having said that a velcro kilt actually sounds like a bargain as your DS can probably wear it more than once.

grannytomine · 07/08/2017 10:17

I don't have an opinion on you son wearing a kilt, I think they look lovely but not worth arguing about but I amazed at all the angst about having an accident when wearing a kilt. Much worse in trousers, I mean you can't avoid getting trousers wet if they have a little accident (or even a wee wee) but with a kilt if they are standing up it often just means socks and shoes gets wet. Well that is my experience. Makes you wonder how girls ever get toilet trained as it would obviously be impossible in a dress.

CoughLaughFart · 07/08/2017 10:24

So you're saying you have a "distaste" for Scottish people using Scottish English on a thread specifically dealing with Scottish clothing?

I think that's a bit disingenuous. The thread is about dress codes, not about Scottish dress itself.

JessieMcJessie · 07/08/2017 10:29

Please come back and tell us what your husband thinks. Is he going to wear one and be happy about it?

Everyone here has made it clear that the Lily doesn't have to be expensive, so your financial objections don't hold water. I think it's a bit sad that rather than looking happily forward to a lovely family wedding you're fixating on a fairly irrelevant detail and getting all upset and negative about it. I'd love a dress code for my DS at such an event, would mean I didn't have to think at all about what to put him in.

I do hope you can get past the negativity you feel about this request and have a lovely time.

BreconBeBuggered · 07/08/2017 10:29

DS1 looked so adorable kilted up for a wedding aged 2 that we had to buy a kilt for DS2 when there were no convenient weddings, just so that we'd have photos of them both in kilts.
They're really no trickier to manage than any other outfit worn by an excitable, piddle-prone toddler. I understand the reluctance to bow down to orders about what your DC should wear, but formal options for small boys are pretty thin on the ground.

JessieMcJessie · 07/08/2017 10:30

Lily= kilt, damn autocorrect

NoCryingInEngineering · 07/08/2017 10:32

We had a run of weddings to go to a year or so past, the first 2 of which were in Scotland. I got DS a cheap baby kilt (I'm Scottish so it seemed the obvious thing to do) with velcro fastening which cost I think £12 & is machine washable. He's worn it to weddings & christenings both sides of the border (he was about 15mo at the first event) and to my mind has the advantage that he was very clearly 'dressed up' even when the top half of his outfit was just a plain baby vest and a knitted cardigan. But then my pet hate is very small boys in tiny formal suits. They look so uncomfortable

squoosh · 07/08/2017 10:34

But then my pet hate is very small boys in tiny formal suits. They look so uncomfortable

Do they though?

ButchyRestingFace · 07/08/2017 10:34

I think that's a bit disingenuous. The thread is about dress codes, not about Scottish dress itself.

Hmm

It's about a kilt. I didn't say it was every piece of Scottish dress ever fashioned.

The thread is naturally going to attract Scottish posters.

If you find Scottish words so distasteful, perhaps best to stay off such threads?

TheCraicDealer · 07/08/2017 10:34

It doesn't matter how "cute" other people think OP's son will look in a kilt, it's her wean and her £££. Unless her DH is dying to put their DS in a kilt (and as he doesn't even own one himself that's hardly likely) then it's a bit wank the b&g are ditacting what he should wear but not offer to pay for it. At least if she put him in little black or navy chinos with a matching tie, bow tie or waistcoat there's a chance some of it might get reworn.

Kilts aren't my taste either and the Scottish people I know are a bit "meh" about them generally. I think my opinion has been shaped by the "Scottish-two-generations-removed" kilt wearers I've known. But if someone turned up to my wedding in one I'd let them crack on, and the reverse should apply.

squoosh · 07/08/2017 10:34

It’s like when people on MN say babies look uncomfortable in anything other than a ‘crisp white babygrow’.

CoughLaughFart · 07/08/2017 10:38

If you find Scottish words so distasteful, perhaps best to stay off such threads?

If this is still an issue for you seven pages and ten hours on, perhaps best to step back?

ButchyRestingFace · 07/08/2017 10:40

If this is still an issue for you seven pages and ten hours on, perhaps best to step back?

It's not a "huge" issue. Nice try though. Smile

ilovegin112 · 07/08/2017 10:43

I wonder what the op if the bride was Indian and had requested sari/ sherwani be worn would be saying / doing, why would a bride asking about Hindu wedding be any different than a Scottish wedding

ButchyRestingFace · 07/08/2017 10:45

I wonder what the op if the bride was Indian and had requested sari/ sherwani be worn would be saying / doing

Is that a religious requirement for guests?

(I don't know - genuine question)