Are you a feminist?

[NoLoveofMine]

Yes or no...

*pole dance... not LIKE!! bloody phone!

Yes Carl I sometimes wonder if any other group would have so many people within that group who reject the movement for their own equality and rights.

Many STEM careers were originally mainly taken by women - computer programming is a case in point. They rose in prestige when men started working in them in greater numbers.

I suspect they might nolove

As I say apartheid was overthrown by a class of people who agreed on almost nothing except that they wanted rid of apartheid .

I think it's OK to be a 'good enough' feminist. Do your best. You can't win every battle or fight every fight. As pp said we won't all agree on the details but the idea of women being free to make choices and not suffering abuse - FGM, honour killings, domestic abuse - is a pretty good starting point for a 'good enough' feminist.

And you can be a feminist and still on occasion make non-feminist choices. It's awareness that's important.

I agree with mouse

Thanks for your replies. I agree that they are my choices and I would actually feel oppressed if I couldn't make those choices for myself. But I have been told outright that the breast augmentation and pole dancing are for the benefit of men. Not true. I know some feminists don't think you should take your husband's name, but my current surname is my dad's surname so what difference does it make, my fiancé has the nicer surname so I'm changing mine to that.

I just feel picked apart by some feminists, who have scared me off the idea of learning more about feminism, to be honest.

I would just like to add that it will be a cold day in hell when I wipe up the piss of a grown man.

I am definitely a feminist.

I don't understand how people can say that the feminism boards put them off feminism?! To me, posters like VestalVirgin, Bertrand and Datun are the crystal clear voices of reason! I actually learnt what feminism really is on mumsnet, and it makes perfect sense.

For ages, I just didn't look at the world critically. Those things were there- the crippling inequalities and dreadful attitudes - but they were just normal and I didn't notice. Once you get it, you can't go back. I have two daughters, and sometimes I lie awake at night worrying about their future in this sexist world.

I simply don't understand how women can be ok with the way things are.

No.

Years ago I would have said yes but frankly I'm embarrassed at the behaviour of militant feminists, so often seen on here, spouting their vitriol without even taking proper notice of what is being said. A way of shouting others down. That's not something I would want to be associated with.

NoLoveofMine

You realise I'm talking about statistical averages across hundred of thousands of children as opposed naming a few female scientists.

As well, I'm not talking about uptake of a subject, I'm talking about attainment. Easy to find stats (when not posting from a stupid iPhone)

but my current surname is my dad's surname so what difference does it make

I don't want to go off on too much of a tangent so apologies but I don't understand why a woman's surname is deemed her father's but a man's is just his.

I would just like to add that it will be a cold day in hell when I wipe up the piss of a grown man

And with that Nancy91 you joined the movement

Men are not more capable than women in my opinion.

Yes. In an Emma Watson way though - not a man hating way

Does anyone else think this is a hilarious response?

No offence to EW, who is using her platform to get young women and girls to read some very good books.

But depressing that some women only want to identify as a feminist if the image it's culturally associated with is a beautiful, young and thin one.

God forbid we might look, think or say anything at all that might make us unattractive to men. A perfect example of the cage women live in.

Always called myself a feminist. Didn't know about the 3rd wave until I started reading the feminist boards on MN. Def not one of those. Didn't know about gender critical until I started reading the feminist boards. Def am one of those.

I find the constant references to the 'Patriarchy' off-putting. I also have problems with it being a Marxist based analysis, mainly because it's difficult to defend Marxism in this day and age. I would be v happy if some kind woman would talk me round this.

Yes for safe and private spaces for women. Yes for equal opportunity. Not sure about quotas etc. Def a 'terf'.

I have a husband and sons and am def not a man hater. DH is my favourite (adult) person in the world and my sons are showing every sign of growing up to be fine young men.

Sorry OP, I know you wanted yes or no but I don't think it's that simple. There are many people who say that they are feminist who I don't recognise as being feminist. Those who promote prostitution, for example. Or call other women bigots

I believe in equality but I also don't mind my chap paying for dates and opening doors.

NoLoveofMine, that's a good point!

I agree MerchantofVenice and they are incredibly welcoming. I'm not very knowledgeable, still learning and can be an idiot but am still tolerated

Nancy- there isn't some sort of "feminist executive" that says whether or not you're in! What frightens you about wanting to find out more?

But just to point out that your prospective husband's name is just as much his dad's as yours is........

Thanks Nancy91! And I think there's absolutely no reason you can't be a feminist if you wish to be.

"Years ago I would have said yes but frankly I'm embarrassed at the behaviour of militant feminists, so often seen on here, spouting their vitriol without even taking proper notice of what is being said"

Can you say more?

Fuck no.
I don't believe women are vulnerable little things which need more protection then anyone else in society, and I don't believe it's society's fault if you've picked the "wrong" partner.

I'm working class. I couldn't give a shit about women in STEM careers just as feminism doesn't care about working class women.

Everyone likes an excuse for failure/under achieving, be that in your professional or personal life and feminism gives you that so I see why it's necessary for some.

I work in what was a traditionally male career. My "line manager" is female as is the one above her. The head of the organisation is female. The home Secretary she answers to is female. The prime minister she answers to is female and the head of state above even her is female. Not exactly the best evidence for a patriarchy eh?

And finally using words like "oppression" to describe how women have to live in the UK in 2017 is quite fucking laughable, not too mention hugely insulting to millions of dead. If I was oppressed I'd be using that very same laptop I use to moan about issues on, to be getting a flight out and my family to safety.

I'm a feminist by dictionary definition, after reading mumsnet/Twitter I'm certainly not as defined in reality

Finding Emma Watson inspirational with regards to her work on gender equality has fuck all to do with how she looks or her weight and everything to do with her attitude... suggesting that I might only admire her work because of how she looks is very very patronising and anti-feminist actually!
It's about awareness (as someone said up thread) and she has done a good job of raising it in my opinion....

Grilledaubergines I genuinely have no idea where you've seen that sort of spouting of vitriol without listening to what's being said. The feminists on here are about as calm, balanced and articulate as people can be!

Anger - yes. But I'm angry about the horrific violence towards women and girls, the erosion of women's rights, the growth of demeaning pornography. Anger is surely the correct response to these things? Being angry doesn't make you wrong.