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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Kids not allowed - AIBU?

496 replies

SlaggyTwoShoes · 01/08/2017 12:21

Very happy to be told I'm BU but please go gentle if I've somehow been doing things wrong here!!

I've just been turned away from my appointment at clinic where I've been having laser hair removal...because I had my kids with me. It's a 10 minute procedure which I've been having a course of over months so I've always left them (either one or both) sitting on the chairs in reception with my phone to watch tv (very quietly) or pencils and colouring pads. They never run around or misbehave as they've done this a lot - I'm a single mum and have previously lived abroad with them so often haven't had anyone to watch them and just had to bring them with me everywhere.

This clinic is nationwide (uk) and I've been to various locations for a couple of other (quick) procedures and left the kids in reception (the reception is always very quiet and receptionists always offer to keep an eye). I know it's not ideal but figured it's just what people do. Have I got this totally wrong?? This is the first time I've ever been told it's not okay, but it's the first time I've brought them to this particular clinic location. They told me I could leave the kids sitting in the costa coffee opposite (obviously I was never going to do that!) or get someone to watch them...which is going to be really tricky for me. I can't see why I can't leave them sitting safely in their reception for 10 mins like I've always done. So AIBU or are they?

OP posts:
LilaBard · 01/08/2017 19:05

YABU I'm afraid. I'm a dental nurse/receptionist and the amount I'm expected to look after kids is unreal, its day and daily. And parents get a cob on when I say well you can leave them in the waiting room if you wish but just so youre aware I can't see them from the office and have to concentrate on my job. Likewise when I'm in the surgery and their babies start crying etc. I do honestly sympathise with parents who have no childcare but at the end of the day if I wanted to be a baby sitter I would be. I don't mind well behaved kids kids but I'm not remotely maternal, so please don't expect me to stop your kid crying etc especially while I'm doing my job. Sorry OP.

StoorieHoose · 01/08/2017 19:06

@dancergirl where do you work? If I had an appointment with your boss could you look after my two kids? Is that in your job description? They are wild and will prevent you from doing the job you are paid for but hey 'it takes a village'!

NoFucksImAQueen · 01/08/2017 19:07

My oldest is 6 and he'd be fine in the situation you describe. Clearly I'm in the minority though

StoorieHoose · 01/08/2017 19:07

I'm wondering if the laser removal place is a franchise rather than an organisation so it wouldn't necessarily be the same rules

StoorieHoose · 01/08/2017 19:08

What situation? Sitting in Costa by himself or being looked after by a receptionist?

aaaaargghhhhelpme · 01/08/2017 19:10

It's surely not about whether the child is ok or not...it's the fact it's a business that doesn't want to/isn't insured to have unaccompanied minors on their premises

itstoolateforthisbollox · 01/08/2017 19:11

felt that because I've been coming to this brand of clinic on and off for years and they've always been so accommodating with the kids (and I'd felt it was safe) I'd thought it was okay and kind of accepted practice

For YEARS? So you left your toddlers in reception with complete strangers?

TinselTwins · 01/08/2017 19:13

YABU

YABU to the staff
AND
YABU to the other customers who made other arrangements for their kids to go to an adult environment
I ONLY wanna see other adults if I treat myself to a salon trip!

RainbowsAndUnicorn · 01/08/2017 19:14

Why is a receptionist who doesn't know the children or the OP part of the village?? Did she know that when she applied for the job.

Paying for a beauty treatment and leaving young infant aged children alone whilst you have it isn't in the interests of child safety. And the op says she has been leaving them alone for years at appointments so how tiny would they have been then?

An hours babysitting isn't much, far less than the appointment cost and the OP found money for that but not the children.

Mychildcouldnotbreaatfeed · 01/08/2017 19:16

Beauty treatments are a real treat for me and I hate having kids around when it's my adult space in my head and I've left my own to go there.

Sorry op but I don't think it's fair on anyone else or the receptionist

TinselTwins · 01/08/2017 19:16

YAalsoBU to your children, it's not a safe environment for children, there are chemicals and heat and other hazards.

Dancergirl · 01/08/2017 19:17

stoorie you are extrapolating.

Can you not see there is a world of difference between the situation you describe (which I presume is not ten minutes) looking after so-called 'wild' kids, and the OP's situation? You are not comparing like with like.

And yes sometimes people do things that are not in their job description. Suppose your boss asks you to do something to help out or as a favour? Would you really refuse because it's not in your job description even though it would involve very little effort on your part? How petty.

TinselTwins · 01/08/2017 19:18

Makes me want to live in a different country where it really does take a village to raise a child, and people help and look out for each other.

LOL

I come from one of those countries.
We don't take our kids to the salon there either!

InfiniteCurve · 01/08/2017 19:18

Actually I don't think YABU.
I'm an Optometrist - people leave their kids in our reception area, no big deal as long as you are confident they can sit quietly.
And it's for 10 minutes, not hours!
In the event of a problem, reception could get you, surely?
I'm having trouble imagining what could happen to 2 past toddlerhood children, in a public but supervised area, almost certainly within earshot of their parent.Unlike in Costa...

Dancergirl · 01/08/2017 19:18

I ONLY wanna see other adults if I treat myself to a salon trip

FGS, they are not in the room with you!!

itstoolateforthisbollox · 01/08/2017 19:18

Suppose your boss asks you to do something to help out or as a favour?

If they asked me to mind unknown young children it would be a big fat NO.

Dancergirl · 01/08/2017 19:20

I come from one of those countries.
We don't take our kids to the salon there either

No, I imagine they are being looked after by a friendly neighbour or relative.

Dancergirl · 01/08/2017 19:21

infinite finally the voice of reason. I often see children in waiting rooms at the dentist, optician and so on. Is this really not allowed nowadays?? Shock

TinselTwins · 01/08/2017 19:21

Medical type appointments are different, as in they're not optional. Some people have to bring kids

A salon trip does not have the same mitigating circumstances, it's always unreasonable

Mychildcouldnotbreaatfeed · 01/08/2017 19:22

Dancer. I have lots of children and a once or twice a year salon trip is a real treat. I don't want to have other peoples kids around me - the salon I go to is adult only and if I obey the rules and don't take mine then why should anyone else be able to break the rules?

TinselTwins · 01/08/2017 19:22

No, I imagine they are being looked after by a friendly neighbour or relative. still not in beauty salons!

Dancergirl · 01/08/2017 19:33

Not all salons are adult only mychild

Mychildcouldnotbreaatfeed · 01/08/2017 19:34

Agree dancer but the one the op goes to is and states no kids, as does the one I choose to go to.

Dancergirl · 01/08/2017 19:37

Medical type appointments are different, as in they're not optional. Some people have to bring kids

The result is the same though: the receptionist is effectively 'babysitting' waiting children. Suppose those children fall over/hurt themselves/choke or get abducted by aliens in the ten minutes it takes for the appointment?

And who says which sort of appointment is optional or not? Twice yearly dental check ups on healthy teeth? Some experts say that's overkill. Laser hair removal? Don't be so quick to judge. Suppose the OP has a medical condition which results in excess body hair?

TinselTwins · 01/08/2017 19:40

Not all salons are adult only mychild
What sort of salons don't deal with strong chemicals, heat, sharps etc?

Dentists etc see children as clients too, so it's not a childfree space anyway, and I don't leave mine at the receptionist when I go they come in and have their teeth checked too.