AIBU to need to hear something positive about having twins?

[Buildalegohouse]

Found out 2 weeks ago that I'm pregnant with twins.

The reactions of people we've told have mostly been a combination of shock, laughter and lots of 'good luck' types comments.

To be honest, I still haven't really processed the news fully and I'm pretty focused on all the negatives (higher risk pregnancy, money issues, need a bigger car, eventually need a bigger house, how we'll cope, sleep etc etc etc). I don't feel that anyone has been able to make me feel even slightly less panicked or reassured.

I don't even know anybody who has twins who can give me practical or reassuring advice.

We already have one DD who is nearly 3 and this was very much a planned and wanted preganancy but I feel so overwhelmed at the moment.

Please, please could anybody offer any positives or at least practical tips for coping with end of preganancy and arrival of babies?

(I know it will be difficult and expensive and hard work please can that not be the ficus of the thread, I need to hear good stuff ).

TIA

People are generally assholes when it comes to stuff like this.

The same people that are saying "good luck" will be asking their other friends with newborns "ooh, when's number two coming? Don't leave it too long will you".

Having one, two or ten kids is hard - just like you coped with your DD, you'll cope with this.

Take it all with a shrug and a smile or just tell them to piss off and take their negativity elsewhere.

Massive congratulations to you and yours on your lovely news!

I was never asked which one was the evil one.

If I had I would have said - the one asking me that question

My DD was 2 when they were born and I was often asked 'who's the eldest?' And she would pipe up 'ME'

Cue embarrassed question asker'

Got to love 2 year olds

GreenTulips

Brilliant, Green Tulips. I'd love to have borrowed her. Got sick of that question.

Just to say you can get identical twins with 2 placentas !! It's rare but it comes from a very very early egg split. Mine are - confirmed on zygosity testing - their genetics are 99.99999997 identical. Probably all the 'identical' looking 'non identical' twins are like this.

When I found out I was pregnant with twins I can only describe my reaction as devastated. I just couldn't stop thinking how hard it would be, how much it would cost to have 2....and then people's reactions "rather you than me"..."twins?! Good luck!"

I spent most of my pregnancy hating everything about it and was diagnosed with pre natal depression.

However, once they were born, 8 weeks early, everything changed.

They're nearly 2 now, and I can honestly say it's not been as hard as I thought it would be, yes there are times when you just cry because it's overwhelming, but it is so, so worth it.

Only the other day when watching them play in the garden together I said I can't even imagine what it would be like to just have one, it would be boring and it's so amazing to watch them play and interact.

I wish I could go back to my pregnant self and tell her to enjoy every moment of the pregnancy, as it would all be ok in the end and worth it.

Just a warning, having b/g twins does not stop people asking if they are identical

You have lots of positives already but just to add I have 3.5 year-old boy/girl twins and an almost 7 year old and I wouldn't change it for the world, it's not always been easy. But I would say the benefits far outweigh any tiredness etc. Watching them grow up together and watching the relationship with their older brother develop has been lovely. The early days obviously are hard work but are also truly amazing having not just one but two gorgeous babies. I personally found the final trimester and a 3 year old harder than 2 newborns and a 3.5 yr old anyway and the transition from 1 to 3 was definitely easier than becoming parents for the first time even with twins the second time around. As for advice establishing a routine as early as possible and finding a local twins group, and getting out when I could definitely helped. But otherwise, enjoy it. Having twins is amazing and I love having our Twins :-)

Congratulations!
I have identical girl twins they are 19 and they are ace! Here's a list of good things.
I had a vaginal birth with no stitches or forceps etc. I felt like queen of the F"ing world after.
They fed/slept really well slot through early in same cot and soothed each other.
When they were babies/little they had same needs at same time..this sounds hard but in reality same food same amounts, same play same bath, same bedtime. My DS two are 18 months apart and it looked a lot more difficult when hers were small.
They love each other totally and look out for each other. For example they stuck up for each other at school which prevented being left out/bullying, and when they were older and went into our little market town would never leave the other..older still watched out for each other on nights out.
Good luck with yours x