To think that I don't have to style my hair every day for dp!

[toughasnailz]

I've come back after work where I wore a cap as had been swimming with my mindees!

Dp as usual when my hair isn't styled non stop complained about it to me since the minute I walked in the door. Now, I do style my hair, but with the young kids, there just wasn't time after swimming and there were more important things to do.

This happens any day of the week and tonight I've just had enough of it and told him that I couldn't be bothered to listen to him any more! I've said that it's ridiculous that I get all his grief on how my hair is and that I can't just not to it any day of the week, even Sundays! Because of him!

I'm usually a very quiet person, but ffs, I'm tired, and I'm trying to cook our meal and leave me alone!!

My aibu is that this is very out of character for me, was I being unreasonable to be so rude to him?

Is he this controlling it other ways?
This doesn't make him sound great and that's me being really polite

Wtf? You are absolutely not being unreasonable. Your DH sounds a bit of a plonker. Has it occurred to him that you exist for reasons other than looking pretty for him?

What exactly does he say?

He is a dick

Is he controlling in other ways too?

No, YANBU. He is the rude one for criticising your hair. It's really up to you how you style your hair, isn't it? Do you moan at him if he doesn't 'style' his hair to your preference?

It sounds controlling.
You are working and busy... does he put pressure on you to wear certain things too?
There seems to be no respect thst you are just in from work and have been swimming..the priority is your hair is nice to please him?
I'd be telling him where to get to...

So he's always a twat about this?

How weird and well, twattish.

I would have big problems with someone who was saying things like that to me.

Wtf?? If he's so keen on your hair being styled then why not make a cuppa sit on the couch and enjoy it whilst he styles it for you!

@KinkyAfro many things "all you have to do is add some hair products, you've brought loads of them but now it's like you don't want to use them"
"So when are you going to do your hair?"

I haven't 'styled' my hair more than a handful of times since my eldest DC was born nearly seven years ago. My husband hasn't said anything in doubt he's even noticed

YADNBU! What an arse. Well done for telling him off. Why does he care so much about how you have your hair?

My ex used to moan about my hair too. Always telling me it looked so much better styled and it was a shame I didn't make that effort 'for him' any more. I'm very happy that he's my ex!

My hair is usually tied back.

I can't remember ever 'styling' it, and I'm 40+.

My husband would sooner running naked around the dinner table than notice my hair.

Dh doesn't give a crap if I've styled mine or not. Its currently tied back as I couldn't be bothered washing it this morning

Sounds like a hair fetish.

Of course YANBU. I'm my own person. I decide how I do or don't do my hair, make up etc. Or more realistically my lack of time and energy dictate it. DH certainly does not. He can give his opinion (he doesn't) but that's as far as it goes.

How do you normally wear your hair?

You are being very very unreasonable as the only appropriate response to that would be, "go fuck yourself". You certainly didn't need to explain why your hair was how it was, as it's, well, your hair.

Wait, sorry, he complained about your hair while you were cooking him dinner????

You should have chucked his dinner over his head, then told him to go fuck himself.

As you can tell, I have no patience with men like that. He sounds like a controlling dick.

Tell him you are considering getting it cut really really short to be practical and see what he says....

I'd be working out what style of hair he hated most and then getting it done like that.

No, strike that, I'd be telling him once and for all to shut the fuck up about my hair and telling him if he didn't, we were over.

There is only one person you may or not want to style your hair for and that is yourself. He sounds awful and you are definitely not being unreasonable.

Haha he'd hate me. I basically spend the weekend in pyjamas with hair to match. You're lucky if I've brushed it most days (v long, in a scraggly ponytail).

janicebattersby Me too. When we do go out and I spend time on my hair he gets annoyed cos I look fine as I am (his words). I couldn't cope with a man who was so into appearances.

YANBU. He is being ridiculous! Are you just a hairdo to him?