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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think it's pathetic to take drugs on a night out ...

464 replies

Ashkey234 · 24/07/2017 16:10

She's 31 and until she met this new girl she never took drugs.
Now every time she goes out with her she takes Coke.
Every 30 minutes going to the toilet taking more.
I'm starting to dislike her because of it,I know that sounds awful but she's always jumping around after it,sweating,sniffing,bleeding nose and I just think she's Pathetic.
Both 31,she has 3 kids and I think your a mother and doing that.
I love a night out,cocktails etc but I'm honestly thinking of ending our friendship.
What's your opinions?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
5
Hapaxlegomenon · 24/07/2017 17:19

We get the point that drinking until you are poisoned is just as bad!

But OP isn't going to get alcohol poisoning from a couple or cocktails.

But her friend could die Pulp Fiction style on any night out

JustDanceAddict · 24/07/2017 17:22

A couple of drinks on a night out once a week - fine
Line of coke any time - not fine
Drinking to excess every day - not fine

I used to hang around with some people who
Did coke - I never really saw the point - and it certainly affected the health of one of them.

Namechangetempissue · 24/07/2017 17:23

I will just never get it. Nothing smug about it, and I'm not on my moral high horse. It's just a fucking stupid thing to do whoever you are, however rich or poor, celebrity or normal person, high IQ or not.
Drugs make you boring. They make you act stupidly. Nobody looks at someone high on coke and think "wow! I wish I was like that!". They are dangerous -very. They cause huge socio/economic problems. They fund crime and terrorism (ISIS are funded by drug trafficking).
Anyone thinking their "little bit of coke" once a month isn't an issue is on another planet.

alltouchedout · 24/07/2017 17:24

What about fathers who take drugs? Or mothers (and fathers) who risk their lives in other ways? Where's your great concern for their children?

Original poster
Ashkey234 · 24/07/2017 17:25

Mothers/fathers/aunts/uncles anyone who has children to care for
Doesn't matter if your male or female it's still the same

OP posts:
MrsTerryPratchett · 24/07/2017 17:26

@Namechangetempissue almost everything you said also applies to alcohol. And the illegal nature of the drug trade causes a lot of the issues with supply.

And you don't actually know if you will be abnormal alcohol user when you start drinking. You could become an alcoholic. Anyone can.

LilQueenie · 24/07/2017 17:26

yanbu one time can kill. It is pathetic especially when you have a young family to care for.

Hapaxlegomenon · 24/07/2017 17:27

Alltouchedout it's the same with fathers. Also are you on about if someone's dad was a firefighter or something?

HipsterHunter · 24/07/2017 17:28

But OP isn't going to get alcohol poisoning from a couple or cocktails.

But her friend could die Pulp Fiction style on any night out

How could her friend die pulp fiction style at any moment? Please explain to me how that would work?

Don't you think there would be many, many more news reports of people "dying from one line of cocaine" if that were true?

lanouvelleheloise · 24/07/2017 17:28

I know people who use coke/weed/shrooms regularly, without having a habit - and who have responsible jobs that they excel at. The same as people who drink occasionally, without being alcoholics. I think we need a much more nuanced language than good/bad to talk about this stuff. Mumsnet just is the most naive place on the entire internet about it. The number of people on here who seem to equal legality with morality is insane.

Note: I'm not a drug user myself in any way nowadays, except for alcohol. I don't even smoke!

Twinkie1 · 24/07/2017 17:29

Pathetic to take illegal drugs full stop.

GahBuggerit · 24/07/2017 17:30

Funny isn't it all thee wailings of "wont someone think of the children" coming from people willing to drop a friend - and in turn support - just because they do something they wouldn't :(

Namechangetempissue · 24/07/2017 17:31

I don't drink either and feel the same about alcohol

HipsterHunter · 24/07/2017 17:32

YANBU Op and people comparing alcohol to drugs are dumb at best.

@Fluffypinkpyjamas LOL alcohol IS a drug you silly sausage. It is just a more socially acceptable one.

People drink alcohol because they like the physiological affects. i.e. they like the mind and body altering effects. They might not like being rolling on the floor drunk, but they like the mild effects at lower doses.

alltouchedout · 24/07/2017 17:32

Alltouchedout it's the same with fathers. Also are you on about if someone's dad was a firefighter or something?

It's not fathers the OP is talking about, that's my point.

I'm not 'on about' anything in particular. The OP has moved now to saying her concerns and judgement are around the fact that recreational drug use is a risk to life, therefore mothers (she does not mention fathers) shouldn't do it. I wonder what other risky behaviours she would like to condemn?

Hapaxlegomenon · 24/07/2017 17:33

HipsterHunter when I was younger I took coke sometimes. I took a line once and I got to the phone just in time to call 999 before I was losing conciousness because there was something in there too. That happens alot

alltouchedout · 24/07/2017 17:33

Excuse me, she has mentioned fathers now she has been prompted. But previously, it was all about the mothers. Hmm

Hapaxlegomenon · 24/07/2017 17:35

*something else

Minkyfluffster · 24/07/2017 17:35

If she is new to it then very likely she will go off it soon, nothing worse than not being able to sleep after a night out. You should probably suggest that she doesn't take it when out with you? or don't go out when new friend is also out?

I have an associate that is a heavy user and recently I met her for a coffee in the day time, she seemed surprised but honestly we caught up and chatted in that time without drink and I think that I got more out it, IYSWIM

AngelaTwerkel · 24/07/2017 17:39

Love all the 'cool' people who think taking drugs makes them bohemian hipsters. Nope it makes you a part of the drugs trade - and that makes you a selfish arsehole.

This. You can't pretend to be ignorant of it either, the utter misery the cocaine industry brings to just about everyone in the supply chain.

Original poster
Ashkey234 · 24/07/2017 17:40

It was about mothers as my friend is female and a mother ...hence my post

OP posts:
Decaffstilltastesweird · 24/07/2017 17:41

Of course it isn't unique in being an industry which causes suffering and devastation. But nobody is arguing that buying palm oil / chocolate puts you in the cool category along with rock stars and awesome writers, which is more or less the argument I've heard irl. "It can't be that bad if Sartre did it". He was a genius (to some) and he also took coke (apparently). He was not a genius because he took Coke.

I think the pp who said we can argue the toss all day about which is more dangerous, but it being illegal does make a difference. You don't know what it's been cut with. It is totally unregulated. You can't buy fair trade cocaine. You risk your career / children by being arrested / reported to ss. People who are involved in the industry are frequently scary fuckers who you really don't want to be helping out by adding to their profits (and yes I know there are some legitimate businesses where that is the case too). Finding drugs to buy on any given day takes a bit of time. Far more time than getting a bottle of wine from Sainsbury's. So it takes you away from work / family / doing stuff you should be doing.

People often say that alcohol would be illegal if it was discovered today. But it wasn't discovered today and so far, it's legal. That makes a difference.

Also agree with pps who said that Coke makes people behave like boring wankers anyway. Not usually the case with booze (until you're too drunk, which I've already said I don't like either).

peachgreen · 24/07/2017 17:42

If coke was legal (and therefore had a safe and regulated supply chain) I wouldn't judge people for taking it at all. Each to their own. (I wouldn't take it myself for the same reason I don't drink to excess - I hate feeling 'out of control'.) And I agree it's no worse than alcohol (maybe better, in fact - and it's definitely better than smoking).

But the fact is, it's not legal. The cocaine trade is abhorrent and causes untold misery and death around the world. And it's not safe because you can't be sure that you're taking what you think you're taking. So for me, it IS the illegality that's the problem.

I also think there's a bigger conversation to be had about which drugs are legal and which are illegal in this country.

HipsterHunter · 24/07/2017 17:43

to be honest @Ashkey234 I would just arrange to see her during the day when neither of you are taking drugs. HJave a catch up over a (decaf) coffee. Unless you only like to see her to enable your cocktail drinking?

Decaffstilltastesweird · 24/07/2017 17:43

I think the pp who said we can argue the toss all day about which is more dangerous, but it being illegal does make a difference

Should be "I agree with the pp who said we can argue the toss all day about which is more dangerous, but it being illegal does make a difference"

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