Pass remarkable sales assistant??

[BitchinBlack]

So I took 16month old DS for a pair of new shoes today to a local shop. The sales assistant seen fit to comment "what?? He's not walking yet? (With a shocked look on her face) He really should be at that age"
DS is sofa surfing and walking with support he just hasn't taken of independently yet. I am absolutely livid and I gave her a good dressing down, so was I unreasonable??

She was brainlessly commenting on something well above her pay grade.

This has to be the most obnoxious thing I've heard on mumsnet. Because shop assistants are just air heads who deserve to be 'dressed down'. Well done.

@BitchinBlack

I think they're all being mean to you. Can you pick me up a pair of loafers, size 8 in a blinging colour when you're next getting a pair for your husband? Thankx.

You sound like a nightmare!
Waiting for the next update when OP remembers that she sends flowers on the staffs' birthdays and takes them to Lourdes if they're unwell.
Seriously hope that OP is exaggerating to improve her image after she gained an insight that everyone wasn't as vile as her. If not, having visions of some arrogant nightmare customer bestowing gifts on 'her servants'. Vomit

@silentlyscreaming

Don't forget to budget in for the flowers and chocolates OP tips when repaying her for the loafers.

SilentlyScreamingAgain

I know this because my friend is a GP

Quite the expert you are then.

Ffs. I can see that my reasoned points are totally out of place on a thread that has totally committed to vilifying OP.

At the risk of being the square who won't join in... remember that there's a real chance the OP is just an actual person, with feelings and everything, who was upset by a really insensitive sales assistant making negative remarks on her baby. Boring stance for me to take, I know...

It sounds like the shop assistant came across with the same surprise and disdain some of the posters on here display when hearing a child can't use knives and forks correctly by the age of two or perhaps tie shoe laces at three. Fucks me off when people express horror over a child whose development is different to the norm. She shouldn't have been so rude actually.

Agreed @MerchantofVenice. I think the OP has been much more unpleasant here with her wording than she was in real life and she's suffered for it. I suspect she's off the thread now thankfully.

It was quite insensitive of the sales assistant to speak out like that, and if there had a medical problem to account for the delay in walking, especially so. My child wasn't walking until nearly 18 months, health visitor had no concerns.

Can we leave off with the grammar correction, it's a bit off, no matter what your opinion of the OP, and doesn't make you look clever.

by "above he pay grade" you actually meant "above her station" and you have taken umbrage at the staff daring to talk to you without tugging their forelock. Bet she even looked you in the eye, the cheeky thing!

peach - the OP might not have used those actual words, but I bet the inference was there in how she spoke to the shop assistant.

MerchantOfVenice

The OP asked is she was being unreasonable so I think it's understandable that posters are directing their comments on her behaviour. Almost no one has said that the shop assistant comment was OK. It was clearly a dumb and rude comment. I just think the OPs reaction was OTT.

You are quite right that there is no need for posters to be rude to the OP. MNHQ will delete any personal attacks.

That is late to be walking. I know this as my best friend is a GP and her daughter took a while to start walking

It is at the latter end, but 10 - 18 months is the usual range for walking (information from NHS not my GP friend)

@OlennasWimple Hmm, possibly - but I really think that if OP had posted in a different manner she would be getting support because it really IS unreasonable to comment on someone else's baby's development. If OP had relayed the incident in full as she did in a later comment without mentioning anything about pay grades etc I suspect the majority of posters would be on her side.

If the sequence of events us as I understand them the shop assistant said something they shouldn't then the OP said some things they shouldn't.

Then the OP starts a thread on AIBU being rude and patronising about retail staff and adds some irrelevant information regarding tipping, Christmas gifts and husband's shoes.

It's all a bit muddled.

Isn't "sofa surfing" what young adults without an official address do? Surely if he's doing this he should be getting his own shoes fitted (or moving back in with you?)

I assume you mean "cruising".

Either way YABU, snobbish and condescending (and DIYNovice sounds like something made out of things one would wear on one's foot inside a shoe).

For what it's worth OP I agree that the shop assistant was out of order and lacked sensitivity. I would not have been happy about it either, Its not what you'd expect or be prepared for when just going to buy a pair of shoes. She shouldn't have made comment when she knows nothing about your child or their background. I don't think it was wrong to challenge this and maybe she will choose her words more wisely in the future.
For those here saying OP shouldn't be buying shoes unless walking, she said already said child is cruising, walking with support- so what if she wants to go outside and support dc walking while they're learning?
Think the slating of op has gone a bit far here. The term "dressing down" is a figure of speech and exactly what op said is unknown so how does anyone know she was rude?

Are you telling me that no one on her buys their husbands shoes?? I find that hard to believe

I find it impossible to believe that anyone 'does' buy their husband's shoes. Disability and agoraphobia apart, why would you!??

Op you don't sound educated so what's with the pay grade comment. I worked in a well known clothes shop whilst I did my masters. Bills had to be paid etc

Like.....a sock?

@scottishdiem I love you purely for that comment. And will always always love you til my dying day.

OP actually it was a fair comment because pre walkers aren't suitable for all non walking children. The sales assistant needed to know there was no issues with hips etc that she may need to factor in or indeed to make sure the shoes were correct. By saying still not walking she opened up a dialogue whereby a mother (or indeed a father we've got a female dr who now I think men deserve the same equality and should be permitted the rights to buy their own shoes) could discretely say actually he's had hip issues, he had a broken foot at birth, he just cba yet etc. Instead that opened her up to abuse in the workplace from you.

And to make it worse you can on here and slated her more by referring to the comment as above her pay grade. On behalf of that sales assistant you can take your chrimbo crap and ram it up your arse

I suspect there was an offer to punch her puss - not sure if by OP or the assistant though.

I'd have been black-affronted with all this carry on in my salon@!

My DS just looked over my shoulder and said "Cruising ain't something a toddler would do"
Filthy little blighter means the Urban Dictionary definition of course

The term "dressing down" is a figure of speech
Yes, and it implies a severe telling off, possibly delivered by a Sergeant Major prior to a Court Martial. If op meant something different, she should have used a different phrase.
When it's words on a screen, the words used matter.

Izzy - yes. A sock.