New mum clubbing

[MrsG841]

A friend of mine has just become a first time mum and her LO is 6 days old.

She messaged a few us to organise going clubbing at weekend.

AIBU to think that she shouldnt think about this at such an early stage?

Be concerned she needs a break jesus I've heard it all now.

Agree with PPs that it seems to be the word "clubbing" that is very emotive and throwing people off.

Some have suggested that a wine bar or dinner at a pub would be better. But what if there is loud music in the pub, or people start dancing? Would that hurt the baby somehow?

I've gone to night clubs and sat down with one beer watching people dance, and left after 2 hours. Maybe this is your friends plan. I've also gone to a pub and danced all night. Hell I've gone to a summers day picnic and got on drugs. "Clubbing" can mean anything.

Why do women these days not want to nest and enjoy the newborn phase ? Everything is so rushed these days and as soon as baby is born mam is talking of getting her figure back , going to work etc etc obviously it's each to their own but I do wish women would slow down and let their bodies rest . Clubbing 6 days after birth is dangerous and she should be letting her body rest and recover from the birth not to mention nesting with new baby

How is it dangerous? Gosh, if only i'd known, i'd have stayed in!

Rhubard I wasn't shocked about a night out without baby at all. I've left my babies with my MIL and gone out for an evening.
I was wondering how you would babysit an ebf baby that refused to ever take a bottle. I can't imagine it was easy.

You have absolutely no right to say what another woman should be doing. You do what you want with yourself after birth, and don't even think about telling other women what they should be doing with theirs.

If I had a normal delivery, I would have gone clubbing at 6 days post partum. I develop major depression in the days after giving birth that going out wouldn't seem like a big deal.

It's dangerous because the placental site is still technically an open wound susceptible to infection 6 days pp. Also your body has been through a massive ordeal giving birth and needs rest ! It's nobody's business what she does and she is free to go clubbing if she wishes . As I said in op each to their own !!

I try my best not to judge but if my friend acted this way to their newborn I would be worried about their mental health.

Who wants to go out clubbing when your leaking from every hole, your fanny is swollen, battered and stitched up with fish wire?

Personally, My partner and I wanted to spend every minute with our newborn - but I guess everyone is different.

Agree user

I know so many men that have gone out and 'wetted the babies head'. How is this different op?

I see. So should women just be confined then? Presumably these infections could be picked up anywhere? At the supermarket? At the mother-in-laws? At a restaurant?

Who wants to go out clubbing when your leaking from every hole, your fanny is swollen, battered and stitched up with fish wire?

Me. I wasn't leaking from any holes, and my "fanny" was in pretty good nick.

Yes, everyone is different.

Not everyone loves every stage. Personally I can't wait until my second born gets a bit older.

Well I wouldn't have felt physically up to it. If it were my friend I would probably suggest starting off in a nearby pub where we could all sit down and catch up then see how she feels about going on to clubs after a couple of hours, she might prefer to stay put.

I think it's her call but judging by my experience - natural birth - I first went out with DD in her pram when she was 9 days old for hour tops and once home bled so bad I was dizzy for ages from over doing it and that was day 9 so clubbing would have been a big No No but guess she feels okay. Different strokes for different folks and there's nowt so queer as folks

Having read all 17 pages of this circular thread, I can safely confirm that the key word here was "clubbing". It brings out the snob in so many...

Meh, 6 days in I could have gone clubbing despite breastfeeding and having a stitched up coochie. I felt fine, albeit a bit tired. The difference being that I wasn't that interest in going clubbing (because they're all shit here).

But because I'm someone who can, you know, think outside the box and understand that everyone is different, I would never judge a mom who fancied kicking her heels up after giving birth. A few of my friends were like that, I never judged them either.

Oh Christ the new baby stage is awful. I'd have loved to feel well enough to go clubbing. Utter misery, contemplating the ruin of my (a) body (b) life.

Pengggwn, exactly.

Pengggwn - Sorry, my 'exactly' was to your post at 15.55!

Actually, it's. it just three clubbing that"s causing the outrage.

Nothing upsets mumsnetters more than anyone saying "Acrually, I felt OK a few days after giving birth. Yes, a bit sore, and needing to change sanitary towels quite often, but apart from that, I was fine". It infuriates people! I think it's seen as letting the side down..........

Thymelord I dare say the infection could be picked up anywhere but nature intends women to stay home as rest and the maternal instinct is primarily to allow mam and baby bonding time . It's also one of reasons newborns feed so frequently so that mam rests . Yes it's to build to supply but it's also a clever way to get mam to sit and rest and not move around too much when the body is in the recovery period . After I had my first and second I went to supermarket and did food shop on days one . I just wanted to show off baby but with 3rd and 4th I cherished those newborn days and as I breastfed my 3rd and 4th I felt an overwhelming urge to nest ? I ff my first and second and didn't have such strong urges to stay home and nest . I never rested and ended up very poorly with pnd but I listened to my body with 3&4 and felt much better for it. We are all different I guess . But answer to your question is basically yes an infection can happen anywhere but is much less likely if mam rests at home with baby nursing in bed .

I went out clubbing in a bikini top when my first born was 3 weeks. I didn't think it was that big of a deal tbh.