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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To want to cry at all the school demands for money??

189 replies

BrieAndChilli · 18/07/2017 17:36

Most of it doesn't have to be paid until September but still...

£220 for DS1 year 6 residential trip
£100 for DDs overnight trip
£18 x 3 for fruit snacks for next term
£55 for mincraft club that DS2 wants to do
£2 each for trip to ruins ( in our small village so we have been to a million times (no exaggeration!)
£1 each for the priviledge of leaving thier shoes at school on the last day and coming home barefoot!

Not unrelated but £10 for each classes teacher collections = £30

Oh and DS2 needs to dress as a big on Thursday!

Oh and for the first 2 weeks of the holidays they are going to holiday club for 1/2 days which is going to be £500 ConfusedShock

Oh plus need to buy new uniform/shoes too, even buying cheaply is a fortune (and DS2 shoes that we bought 2 months ago from deichman cheaply have already got holes in the soles)

Kids are going to have to play in the garden all summer and eat bread and water!!!

OP posts:
Original poster
BrieAndChilli · 18/07/2017 17:36

The above is all this week!!!

OP posts:
pastapestoparmesan · 18/07/2017 17:50

Fruit is free for EYs and KS1. If they're older, give them a snack (or not) yourself. What is the coming home barefoot madness? Never heard of that before.

Soubriquet · 18/07/2017 17:52

£1 each for the priviledge of leaving thier shoes at school on the last day and coming home barefoot

Ey?! Confused

growinglavender · 18/07/2017 17:53

It's a lot I agree, but you have three children it seems which is why it's such a lot.

ImperialBlether · 18/07/2017 17:54

Why would anyone leave their shoes at school?

alltoomuchrightnow · 18/07/2017 17:54

No shoes?!!! WTF? what about glass and dog poo?!

Sirzy · 18/07/2017 17:54

Don't buy the fruit then.

Clubs aren't compulsory. Same goes for donations for teacher gifts.

ImperialBlether · 18/07/2017 17:54

£54 for fruit!!!!

Couldn't you buy a tupperware box for each child and put a bit of fruit in it?

honeysucklejasmine · 18/07/2017 17:56

The shoe thing - knowing they won't fit in sept, some schools arrange for the shoes to be donated around the world, particularly in places where access to education is restricted unless you have the uniform, which lots can't afford.

HipsterHunter · 18/07/2017 17:58

Children are expensive!

Can you send them in with an apple rather than pay so much for a fruit snack? Although I'm not sure how many days of fruit that is, it might be ok value?

HipsterHunter · 18/07/2017 17:59

ALso £10 from each pupil for a teachers gift is madness.

Even assuming 2 TAs and a teacher that is still £100 for each.

Just send a card with a nice note if you have appreciated them.

coddiwomple · 18/07/2017 18:00

Why would anyone want to walk barefoot on a boiling hot pavement (summer time I am guessing) with dog poo, stones, broken glass etc?
Most ridiculous idea of the year.

It sounds a lot, but buying new clothes and shoes is never ending when you have kids, school or no school.
Is the fee for the craft club for a month, a term, a year?

most of your expenses seem to be for outings and clubs, so I don't think it's that bad at all.

Kids summer holidays are never cheap, but it's so nice to do things with them, most of us overspent ridiculously or maybe it's just me

Osolea · 18/07/2017 18:04

Isn't the no shoes thing about donating them to children that have no shoes in other countries?

If so, that's optional, as is mine craft club, and the residential trips, although I know there's a lot of pressure to provide for those. Still, you have plenty of time to save up for them, you know years in advance that there is likely to be a year six week away, and probably smaller residential before that.

I doubt you have to pay for fruit either, but maybe the school has chosen to provide it because parents either aren't providing any or are giving unsuitable snacks.

Three children is expensive, the school is only doing it to do their best for your children, they are not demanding anything. So in the nicest possible way, YABU.

Soubriquet · 18/07/2017 18:09

Yeah surely the shoe thing can't be safe..and I speak as someone who will walk the streets barefoot if my heels hurt.

I carefully watch where I'm going and not hurt myself yet..plus if it gets glassy, I've still got shoes to slip on

angelgirls · 18/07/2017 18:13

I have 4 children and single parent with no financial help, and honestly I feel for you it is expensive but that's for 3 children so it will be. surely you have known about the big bills for residential trips for at least a year?

My children are doing/currently paying

Year 6 residential £280
Year 7 residential £300
Sports tour x 2 £650 each
Brownies sleepover £65
Plus there will be a out of school sport club activity trip to Florida next may that I will get cost for at end of month

What I do is as soon as the letter comes in I divide the total by how many weeks from now until it need to be paid then I pop that amount into a envelope weekly and then it's covered and it helps just finding a few pound each week rather than say £400 one month. I also pop a bit of money away separate each week to cover kids uniform, shoes etc, I would rather by £50 kickers knowing the always last the year rather than cheaper ones that need replacing every term

As for fruit send there own in, that's way to expensive

I hate dress up days to, so glad oldest two are no at secondary and don't do all that

As for leaving school at school... what the hell is that about

flumposie · 18/07/2017 18:14

As teacher I would be horrified that parents felt obliged to buy presents (although saying that I have forked out for 2 teachers and 2 teaching assistants at my daughter's school). Can you contribute less? Send in your own snacks? 3 children mean a lot of expense unfortunately.

FlandersRocks · 18/07/2017 18:16

£54 for fruit!!!! Couldn't you buy a tupperware box for each child and put a bit of fruit in it?

That's a whole term for 3 though...I'm assuming £1 a week each over 18 weeks?

That's 20p per piece of fruit, hardly daylight robbery!

Starlight2345 · 18/07/2017 18:25

I get this from my friend who has 3 children...I get how hard it is listening to 3 children read, how much more everything costs, how she should help with 3 lots of cubs, scouts fee's

To be honest your school bills are going to be 3 times as much , I have very little sympathy , for someone who has 3 children then complains it costs more than one.

thereallochnessmonster · 18/07/2017 18:26

Holiday club sounds expensive. We have sports clubs the dc can do for £20 per day! They can choose from football, multisports, etc.

SheSparkles · 18/07/2017 18:30

I'm going to stick my neck out and say that it's all these expenses x3 or however many children you have that a lot of people don't seem to factor in when they have slightly bigger than average families.
A friend of mine has 4 children -by choice-and did nothing but moan about these kind of expenses....no shit Sherlock, that's why most people don't have loads of children.

I do however think that a lot of schools, both primary and secondary, are a bit insensitive to families' circumstances when they ask for a pound here and a pound there as donations....the shoe thing, why on earth does there need to be a financial donation too-you're donating the damn shoes already!!

Original poster
BrieAndChilli · 18/07/2017 18:36

I'm not literally crying and I'm not moaning that 3 kids are more expensive than 3 (I can count and multiply by 3Hmm) and we do budget for expected expenses it was just more that all these letters came home today in a big wad so was bit of a 'oh god more money to pay' moment.
We get £50 childcare vouchers a month which pays for the holiday club
Not sure about the minecraft club as when DS1 and DD did it a couple of years ago it was only £28 for the half term not £55!! Although I did promise DS2 he could do it when he was old enough.
School trips have thrown me a bit (last year the yr 5 was in October so I was expecting that although was only £70 last year, the yr 6 is normally in march so was expecting it to be the same and have a bit more time to pay it off (it's now in October hence the letter to pay as soon as they get back in September)
Fruit snack the older 2 do take thier own and I think I will stop school snack for DS2 as well.

Was just having a moaning moment on mumsnet as DH not yet home to loan too!

OP posts:
elevenclips · 18/07/2017 18:39

WTAF is the leaving shoes behind Shock. My ds is going to continue to wear his in Sept as I only bought them in April.

The rest is just really unfortunate timing.

woodhill · 18/07/2017 18:41

I wouldn't put in £10 for each teacher. Buy something small yourself for the teachers.

Original poster
BrieAndChilli · 18/07/2017 18:41

Thoses saying about shouldn't moan as I chose to have 3 kids - I hope that none of you EVER moan about
You DH - you chose to marry him
Your kid - you chose to have them
Your job- you chose to apply for it and accept it
Your weight - you chose to eat junk/not exercise
Your house needing cleaning - you chose not to clean it every day
Your pet bringing home a love mouse - you chose to have a pet
Etc etc!!

OP posts:
Babyroobs · 18/07/2017 18:43

It's never ending. Once all the school residential are over you still have teenagers who cost a fortune. They start needing men sized shoes and clothing which costs a fortune. Can you get any help with the summer holiday costs , perhaps buy childcare vouchers or something to save some money?