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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To want to cry at all the school demands for money??

189 replies

BrieAndChilli · 18/07/2017 17:36

Most of it doesn't have to be paid until September but still...

£220 for DS1 year 6 residential trip
£100 for DDs overnight trip
£18 x 3 for fruit snacks for next term
£55 for mincraft club that DS2 wants to do
£2 each for trip to ruins ( in our small village so we have been to a million times (no exaggeration!)
£1 each for the priviledge of leaving thier shoes at school on the last day and coming home barefoot!

Not unrelated but £10 for each classes teacher collections = £30

Oh and DS2 needs to dress as a big on Thursday!

Oh and for the first 2 weeks of the holidays they are going to holiday club for 1/2 days which is going to be £500 ConfusedShock

Oh plus need to buy new uniform/shoes too, even buying cheaply is a fortune (and DS2 shoes that we bought 2 months ago from deichman cheaply have already got holes in the soles)

Kids are going to have to play in the garden all summer and eat bread and water!!!

OP posts:
innagazing · 18/07/2017 18:44

The donation with the shoes is to help with the cost of transporting them to whichever country they are going to. This is a voluntary thing though, and you don't have to donate at all. I would imagine there may be times the shoes could be used through the summer by your own children?

ChoudeBruxelles · 18/07/2017 18:46

You don't need to pay for the fruit snacks, just send some fruit. And I wouldn't leave shoes at school for a pound.

KERALA1 · 18/07/2017 18:48

Yes, those people that blithely have baby after baby but earnestly talk about hand me downs. Just you wait! Having kids is expensive.plus this government hell bent on paring everything back so less and less help there.

BikeRunSki · 18/07/2017 18:48

The shoe thing is nuts. Our school suggested it. No one thought it was a good idea. DD has already grown out of her shoes, and will be finishing term in trainers. DS's shoes are falling apart and not fit to be called shoes anymore! Sal's shoes

The caretaker was particularly not up for collecting up and arranging to send off 170 pairs of shoes.

There are plenty of "bins" around to donate old uniform, shoes, coats etc.

Amanduh · 18/07/2017 18:50

They're not 'demands for money' from the school though, so yabu to say that.
Yanbu to just be Shocky

Amanduh · 18/07/2017 18:51

Oops, posted too soon! That was meant to say Shock at shelling out a lot of £££.

HopeClearwater · 18/07/2017 18:51

Secondary school trips cost even more.

You can always say no. I have to.

LoniceraJaponica · 18/07/2017 18:55

And teenagers cost even more. Most of those expenses are voluntary so cut back on those and pay the ones you have to.

SandyDenny · 18/07/2017 18:56

What a lot of pearl clutching about the shoes, don't people know about donating old shoes to poor countries. Shoes that still fit aren't snatched from children's feet, they aren't forced to walk home through broken glass Grin

It is expensive, too late now but could you work out the annual amount and save weekly next year?

dataandspot · 18/07/2017 18:59

My kids are secondary now but I really like the shoe idea!

SandyDenny · 18/07/2017 19:01

I like the shoes too but they don't do it at my dcs school unfortunately

GreeboIsACutePussPuss · 18/07/2017 19:02

Is that a minecraft lego club by chance? DD's banging on about one but I really can't see that it's worth £55, especially when I don't need the childcare, I'm trying to convince her we could buy some minecraft stuff on Amazon and invite a few friends over to play instead (which is cheaper and will hopefully get her a few invites to their houses)

soimpressed · 18/07/2017 19:02

You may need to start thinking more carefully about your budget as things are obviously tight. As others have said teenagers are far more expensive (just feeding them breaks the bank!).

elevenclips · 18/07/2017 19:05

Sandy, not exactly pearl clutching. It's just far more effectively done by shoe shops like Clarks. Particularly because if you're buying a new pair your kid will actually have a pair of shoes to wear!

OohMavis · 18/07/2017 19:08

A lot of this is not necessary. You're making it more expensive for yourself to agreeing to half of this.

Thinkingofausername1 · 18/07/2017 19:09

Our school is doing that shoe thing too. Maybe you live in the same area??
I understand how you feel. We have already had to pay out a deposit for my dd's trip abroad next year. Plus teachers leaving present, plus anything else Envy

3boys3dogshelp · 18/07/2017 19:11

We have the shoe thing too. We were only informed last week for this week. I think it's a good idea in theory but I don't have any to donate!
Ds1 wrecked his (holes right through so you could see his socks) and is wearing his trainers atm. Ds2 has very wide feet and had expensive ones at Easter that still fit so I'm keeping them for Sept.
I have some old ones but I save them from ds1 for ds3 to use. I have donated and binned the ones I didn't need as I went along. My kids are really worried they are going to be the only ones bringing their shoes home and that they will get in trouble.

RB68 · 18/07/2017 19:15

yeah when they hit secondary

Last yr into yr 7 £100 plus for uniform and pe kit
shoes
trainers
shinpads

3 day away trip 300
lockers 15 per annum
Spanish trip for next yr 300 (said no to this one)
£20 per week for lunches (although some get away with £15) but she has enough to carry without drinks and snacks etc.

Thankfully our bus is free

It goes on and the amounts get bigger and they grow even faster.....

EyeHalveASpellingChequer · 18/07/2017 19:19

None of those (except uniform) are compulsory.

LonginesPrime · 18/07/2017 19:21

OP, I agree it does all mount up!

I have three DCs too, and I have to prioritise my spending and say no to lots of some things (for example, our school has an annual ski trip which costs nearly £1k per person...I haven't let one of them go on it yet, let alone all three!).

It's nice if they can do clubs, hobbies and trips, but kids survive without those things when my budget doesn't stretch to them!

Headofthehive55 · 18/07/2017 19:25

Mine use their shoes throughout summer. I buy new ones when needed, so May and July. I find the shoes thing odd.

JumpyCastle · 18/07/2017 19:26

All the expensive ones are optional and having 3 children is expensive, that's only the tip of the iceberg. Yabu

Lavabravacava · 18/07/2017 19:27

'The school demands for money'

Or how about 'paying for your Angry

Hope you didn't vote tory because it's going to get a whole lot worse.

SandyDenny · 18/07/2017 19:28

I suppose it depends on what type of shoes your dc wear at school, there's no way mine would wear black school shoes outside of school and leaving them there to go to someone who needs them is a great idea imo if they'll definitely not be worn in September. Saves me a trip to the local collection point too.

Afterthenight · 18/07/2017 19:28

Op I hear you.
Our school isn't as bad now as primary was when it felt relentless but they do have a nack of asking for money at very short notice.

There was an amazing trip dd would have loved. Given time we could have done it but seven days notice to find a £200 deposit and the rest due a few weeks later days after Christmas isn't happening.

Dd isn't going on her whole school treat trip on Thursday because we had a week's notice to find £50 and I can't at short notice.