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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Pooing at the table in the pub garden

211 replies

Freetodowhatiwant · 18/07/2017 10:25

This happened on the weekend but I’m still mulling it over and unsure whether IABU so thought I would open it to the MN jury.

On Sunday we were sitting in a nice pub garden, leafy London suburb, a pub known for its food. Seating is picnic benches, close together, on a patio area with large sun shades above. There is a more open, fake grass area where kids play/people lounge on deckchairs nearby but we weren’t in it.

Picnic benches were all full. We were there with an almost-5 year old and a 2 and a half year old.

At the picnic bench next to us were two couples with two children aged close to 3. The Dad whipped out a potty and asked the small boy if he needed a poo. Small boy sat down for quite a while, as potty training kids do, and after about 10/15 minutes did a massive stinky poo. At the table in the pub/restaurant garden right next to all the other customers.

When they whipped out the potty I couldn’t quite believe it going to happen – I hoped they were just trying to encourage him to sit on it – but when the wall of smell hit me I couldn’t help but say something. I said to DH (a bit too loudly so for that I might have been unreasonable) ‘Oh my god it stinks’ but in my defence I was just so surprised they let the child poo at the table where everyone sits and eats (note: we were still waiting for food, not yet eating). I then said to the parents something along the lines of I know what it’s like to potty train but, really, did you have to do this at the table/could you not have gone somewhere else? They said sorry, walked the potty through all the other customers inside to clean it out in the loo and that was that.

But – WIBU to say something to the parents? Is pooing at the table in a potty something acceptable and I am just a loser about it (admittedly I am really not great with poo smells - I would've hated it even if I was one of the people they walked passed inside carrying an open potty with a poo in it)? I understand, in a way, not wanting to go and stand in the toilets with the potty for ten or 15 mins but when I potty trained my eldest I think I would personally taken the child somewhere less occupied and somewhere where people are not eating and drinking! I realise accidents happen too but this was a deliberate getting the potty out and getting him to have a poo a the table situation.

OP posts:
Tingotango · 18/07/2017 10:27

YANBU that is fucking rancid. I would have said more than you did.

NannyR · 18/07/2017 10:29

Disgusting. Of course they should have taken the child and the potty to the loo, not only out of consideration for the other diners but also to give the child a bit of privacy and dignity.

Gileswithachainsaw · 18/07/2017 10:29

Oh god that's gross.

A pub has toilets ffs

RatherBeRiding · 18/07/2017 10:29

That is just grim! Well done you for saying something. It's not like it was an emergency situation and they were ages from the nearest toilet. It would have taken all of 30 seconds to get to the pub loo probably, and sounds like the child wasn't even saying he needed to go!

You weren't unreasonable at all - they on the other hand were!

Alicia555 · 18/07/2017 10:30

Yanbu that's disgusting wtf is wrong with people

Oddish · 18/07/2017 10:31

Ugh do people really do this? 🤢

MrMessy · 18/07/2017 10:31

YANBU. I understand with wee sometimes you don't get much time so a potty is useful, but if he sat on the potty for 10-15 minutes they had time to take him to a toilet or at least some quiet corner in the pub garden where people were not eating. What were they thinking?

Floggingmolly · 18/07/2017 10:31

Some people shouldn't be allowed out in public. Mingers 💩💩

Spuddington · 18/07/2017 10:32

I hate entitled potty trainers.

Out for a meal recently (naice pub, excellent facilities) and hit with the stench of poo. Woman at the table next to me was changing a very dirty nappy on the floor next to the table. I was bloody eating.

PsychoPumpkin · 18/07/2017 10:32

Yuck! Who does that? YANBU.

HateSummer · 18/07/2017 10:32

Wtaf? 😱. If the boy can sit on a potty, he can sit on a toilet! Goodness, I would have done more than complain. Disgusting...imagine all the poo specks you inhaled with your food 😷😷😷

KoalaDownUnder · 18/07/2017 10:34

That is fucking vile, and if anyone on this thread tries to excuse it, I give up on society.

Iwantamarshmallow · 18/07/2017 10:34

YANBU - THEY ARE

KoalaDownUnder · 18/07/2017 10:36

Actually, I would have complained to the pub management. And expected them to come out and ask the parents to remove the child to the toilets.

There is no way I would pay to sit and eat next to that.

Maybe if people pushed back more, these idiotic parents would stop.

liquidrevolution · 18/07/2017 10:36

My DD hates hand dryers and now refuses to use public toilets so we have to use a potty (Shes only just 3 and recently toilet trained so I think its acceptable for now as we are hoping its just a phase Sad). However...I would never put a potty out near other people and near people eating is just horrible. What on earth were they thinking? Shock

I would have taken DD outside the pub grounds into an alley or the car park. We also use a potette so no need to empty the potty and it seems to keep smells to a minimum.

EvilDoctorBallerinaDuck · 18/07/2017 10:36

YANBU. We took a portapotty with disposable liners and still only used it in the loos or the baby changing room, if available. 😝

SheRaaarghPrincessOfPower · 18/07/2017 10:37

Nah, not BU at all. That's revolting. No reason they couldn't have taken the potty into the toilet

Tapandgo · 18/07/2017 10:37

Utterly vile.
These people are complete morons.
It would be unacceptable to have a dog, child or adult pooing next to where you were eating - why do these people think it is ok!

AloeVeraSeeYaCilla · 18/07/2017 10:40

Dirty fuckers.

MrsClegane · 18/07/2017 10:45

WHAT...THE....EURRRRGH

they could have gone to the toilets.... yes its boring stood in a toilet waiting for a child to poo,...god knows mine always decide to go for poos when we go out somewhere...(I am so glad the oldest can go himself now), but it's the decent thing to do, and teaching them where they have to go....take a book, check up on fb, whatever while you wait for the "I've finiiiiiiiiiished" but DO NOT let them sit and crap at the table while people are eating (i know you said you werent...but did they check? what if your food had been brought out mid poo?)

RhubardGin · 18/07/2017 10:45

YANBU

Good on you for saying something!

Do you know if the staff said anything? I can't imagine they were too thrilled with someone carrying a shit through their restaurant!

They were disgusting Angry

SlothMama · 18/07/2017 10:49

That is absolutely disgusting! Why do the parents think it's okay for their child to shit right by others trying to eat?

Bloody filthy

HappyLabrador · 18/07/2017 10:54

Dirty buggers. Bloody disgusting.

Gatehouse77 · 18/07/2017 10:55

No, that was undeniably gross and there's no excuse for it. There are plenty of alternatives to that option.

emmyrose2000 · 18/07/2017 10:56

WTF?? How dare those ferals subject other people to that!

I'd have said a lot more than you did, and I'd have called the manager over to demand the ferals be kicked out. There's no way I'd be paying for my meals after that rancid display either.

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