about ILs on holiday

[Rainbowsandsunshine17]

Hi I'm a regular on MN but have name changed as I don't want friends who use MN to be able to identify me IYSWIM. I need MNers wisdom to help me decide how to deal with what I see as rude behaviour from ILs.
Dh isn't British and as soon as we break up from school we're off to spend three weeks with my ILs at their villa by the beach in dh's home country. I won't lie, I hate this but it's got to be done.
My dh and his family adore fish and seafood (from a Mediterranean country) but I don't even eat fish fingers! I just wasn't fed fish as a kid and never developed a taste. I know it's really healthy and I cook it for the rest of my family, I just can't eat it. My ILs really hate this about me.
There's a famous seafood restaurant near their holiday home and once or twice during the visit they order a proper banquet (!) from this place to eat at home. It's a big treat for dh and it's something he looks forward to when he goes home. My problem is although I'm a guest in their home, they offer nothing else for me to eat, There is fish, shellfish, calamari and rice. That's it. They expect dh to sort it for me. Their holiday home is quite isolated and the only other restaurant is a McDonald's! So dh has to go and get me a meal from McDonald's. I feel a right idiot as I feel really conspicuous sitting with my little brown paper bag at the table. Plus dh's dns keep whining about how come she's getting McD's?!! Last year I said to dh I'm not bloody getting McDonald's again why can't your mum have something on for me. He said I was being difficult.
AIBU but if you have guests, you cater for them? My ILs visit us twice a year for three weeks at a time. They have very specific demands about food. No spicy food, no English food, low carb for fil and also they expect two main dishes plus vegetable side dish as that is the custom in their country. So I do this every night for three weeks for seven people (us plus them). I do all that cooking for then yet MIL basically refuses to cater for me. Meanwhile my dps make sure to feed dh all his favourite food when he visits! Grrr..,
Sorry for the long rant. Please tell me if I'm being difficult or should I expect something to eat? This sounds so bloody trivial but we're going next Saturday and I'm dreading this!

It just takes a bit of planning. I'm sure you must visit the supermarket at some point that week. Just think ahead "I'll buy this now so I can have it on Thursday when they go to that fish place" simple.

This all sounds avoidable. Can you just text ILs to ask their maid stocks chicken in the fridge so you can have it for the fishfest and other meals? And buy/take over halloumi or feta so you can have it as they eat more fish the maid has made?

But as other PPs have said, you hosting them for 9 weeks and catering for their food and likes ... ask them for recipes, discuss with husband, he makes, you freeze. Or just say to DH you'll all be eating out for at least some of the 90 odd meals.

And do point out to DH they have a maid. You're not that. But if he wants to hire a chef to prepare stuff, there are plenty of them.

Or just say to DH you'll all be eating out for at least some of the 90 odd meals

At the local curry house. The one that does not do egg and chips.

Op, for the love of God and humanity and my sanity, please stop cooking for these twats-in-law when they come over.

Millie that's what does really grate with me. My mil has never looked after a house on her own and has never cooked a meal from scratch. Can you imagine? But everyone in dh's family are like that. They're dependent on domestic help. I'd hate to be like that. They think it's beneath dh to do stuff like take the bins out!

Dh is always saying 'oh you can't make that, my dps won't like it'.

He said I was being difficult.

It's your DH. That's your problem. You can talk about your DMIL what she does or doesn't do but the actual problem appears to be that your DH doesn't care about your feelings.

Mil just doesn't want to waste some on me.

Isn't she a delight.

I'd stop going. Your DH can take the kids if he insists. And I'd definitely stop cooking for the cheeky feckers when they come to the UK.

no idea why you are getting such a hard time on here from some posters OP. Your inlaws sound horrible.

I think this is the point at which you say screw them, eat whatever you can this summer while over there (or come down with nasty bug just before you're due to go and leave them to it - or just be honest and tell them you don't want to come!). Then next time then come over here just cook exactly what you want to eat every day.

They obviously don't care about making you feel comfortable, welcome, or valued as a member of the family, so why the hell should you put yourself out for them?

They think it's beneath dh to do stuff like take the bins out!

But presumably they don't bat an eyelid when you do it! They obviously see you as some sort of skivvy! Is that how your DH sees you?

Jeez you really need to take a stand with these horrors.

You never know they might respect you more if you assert yourself a bit.

They are horrors! Dm is convinced dh was adopted!! Actually dm reckons mil makes faces when dh does anything domestic because she's jealous her dh is so useless and lazy!

Can you not buy something from the supermarket and cook it at their house? What do you do the other nights you eat dinner? Maybe his parents think you like Macdonalds?

Good luck, OP. Warning - if your Greek salad looks too good they will all want some. Make some spare!

Yes Imogen I fully expect that!

"ht, so we're talking about a complete disparity of hospitality. They demand you cater to them, but refuse to cater to you. Time to point this out to your husband in NO UNCERTAIN TERMS. He either tells his mother that it's time she upper her game when she is hosting his wife, or she accepts the same level of hospitality from you on her visits. Or he does ALL the catering to their whims for those six weeks a year."

^ This.

I agree with the poster that suggested the reason they insist on the McDonalds is because they're having take away and want you to do the same. A sort of nice but awful bizarre scenario! I suggest you whip up the Greek salad when no-ones around to object. After all no would would object once it's there.
Ps I can and sometimes do eat shellfish. But I'm always sick afterwards. Puts me off doing it again! I'd go with that story. A probable allergy 🙂