If you smoke, can I ask why?

[KrayKray00]

I am currently standing in the rain having a cigarette.

I quit for 4 years and was never a heavy smoker. But I have found myself wondering and waiting to have my next "fag".

It started about three weeks ago when I started getting my youngest to sleep in his cot after 2 years of co-sleeping. After about an hour I of getting him to sleep I would then go outside and have a cigerett once he had finally dropped off. Almost like 5 minutes peace and chill out. My children don't know I smoke as I never do it in front of them but I smell, I know I smell horrid, I hate It.

Before if I had been on a night out drinking I could smoke and it wouldn't bother me the next day or whatever it would just be for that night but I have now found myself unable to stop.

Once the children have gone to school or Nursery's I go out for one, if I am a at uni or work I long for one. I have had 6 today and will probably have another one later on.

I am rather fit and go to the gym 5-6 times a week and I even want one when I come out! I have noticed my throat is sore when I wake up too.

I don't feel well I ke I have have been smoking long enough to seek help from the GP and I do not like vaping. But when I do smoke I get like a break is that makes sense? I feel so disgusted in myself and feel like I have let myself down. It doesn't bother me if other people smoke at all but I feel terrible.

If you smoke can I ask you why? Is it habit? Addiction? A release? I want to quit before I get into a deep hole but do not know what to replace it with?!

I could have written your post..... I am currently sitting here after downloading "Get Your Sit Together" a book which i hope will help me transform. I know that I can stop, I've done it before. I was off the cigs for over 4 years. Then I'd start having one the odd night out. Then when me an hubby away the odd occasion would have a few, then on Summer Holidays, then when having a bad day and now i am smoking 5-10 cigarettes a day and am utterly disgusted with myself. I love smoking. But hate it at the same time. I have a sore throat also in the morning, gym 4-5 times a week and am generally healthy and health conscious - so why am I doing this to myself. Worse still himself is at it too and previously he'd never smoke. He used to be a heavier smoker that I am. I've realistically been on this path for the last 2 years - no point in lying to myself. I managed to go off them cold turkey last October and didn't touch them even on nights out until we had a stressful period from April this year and bang - I'm worse than ever.

I can make loads of excuses up, but I am addicted!

It's funny though because I can say drive 5 hours with DC in the car (overnight) and not even need one, and I obviously quit when pregnant.

I do think my line of work and office culture has a lot to do with it. I work all over but mainly on business parks, with a canteen inside.

If I didn't smoke I probably would end up being so involved in my job I never went outside... and honestly I know and work with lots of people who get into the office early (8am) and don't leave until post 6pm and have just been inside all day!!

To me that's bizarre, but my 15-20 day habit is also bizarre to them!

I have quite successfully when pregnant, but that's it. I kind of want to quit, but on the other hand I also want to be sane, cigarettes are basically what help me be a mother, full time worker (40-60 hours per week) in a demanding job, and the person who keeps the house from falling into disrepair (actually DH helps with that too, but he is not as good as me)

@PencilsInSpace That's a really good post, very thoughtful.

I quit with patches 7 yrs ago after smoking on and off 20 a day for 17 yrs. Best thing I've ever done, when I was a smoker I really believed it would be impossible to give up, cigarettes had such a hold over me. I would wake up wanting one, get out of bed in the night to have one, always planning my next one, driving away from work at lunch to have one off site, chain smoke 3-4 if I knew a time was coming when i wouldn't be able to like a flight etc. I was such a mug! Patches and a resolute mindset and it really wasn't too bad after a few days. 9 times out of 10 now I think it stinks and I feel disgusted by it. Sitting on my patio at the weekend with my friend drinking a bottle of wine and it crossed my mind 1 cig would have been nice again that moment. But it's never just 1, 1 today would be 20 tomorrow and I'm not resetting the clock after 7 yrs smoke free. It is an expensive and disgusting habit which will kill you.

People who smoke are idiots or common. Usually both.

I smoked heavily for almost 20 years. Never thought I'd be able to stop. Tried loads of times but never lasted long. All of a sudden I went cold turkey and that was it, it's been nearly 7 years now and I don't miss it ever, don't even think about it and the thought of smoking is bizarre to me.

It used to scare me when people who had quit for years said they still missed it, made me feel like I'd never be free. But I am. So don't lose hope and just stop altogether, and never go back to it.

I'M STUPID AND COMMON!

I do stupid and common stuff every fucking day. You don't want to know about the STUPID and COMMON things I am doing RIGHT NOW. It would lift yer wig I'm telling ya.

Who let Hyancinth Bucket in?

I'm the same. I don't think it's so much the nicotine. I enjoy going outside and lighting up. It's my moment to myself. But I hate it too. I hate that i smoke. I'd love to stop. I did for a few weeks but then I thought one once In a while won't hurt and boom! Back on it even more than before. I don't know how to stop. I don't know how to replace the urge to go outside with an nice glass of wine and have cig. I don't know how to cope in moments of stress without a cig. I'd love to buy a fake cig (not those with vape juice as strangely, I'm allergic to the smell of vapes. Too flowery). Anyone know where I can get a fake looking cig or just something that kind of lights up if u puff on it but no juice?

I bloody love smoking. I've given up, with occasional falls off the wagon, for a few years now. I started at 14 I think, I'm from a family of smokers (all dead now). I was very much a 'when pissed' smoker, would go all week without, or if in a period of smoking more it would never be more than 1-2 a day (but could easily do a packet when drinking). And never in the house. I'm not sure I'd enjoy a cigarette inside anyway, and especially since the ban, part of the association is going outside I think.

I have a vape kit and it's helped a few times when I've been out in situations I'd usually have a cig, but usually I'd rather just do without. So I don't think it's the nicotine really - I just enjoy the act itself, the associations with good times, funny nights, random conversations with fellow smokers outside the pub, 5 mins peace and 'alone time' in the garden, being on holiday (I miss holiday fags most of all - getting back to the apartment and sitting on the balcony for that last fag), sitting upstairs in McDonalds before school with a gang of friends drinking hot chocolates and smoking menthols etc etc. I know it is lethal, antisocial, it stinks etc but I do miss it. Maybe I just miss being stupid and common!

My best friend and I have a pact that we can start again in our eighties :D

@alpies I use a Vype which has tobacco and no flavour/smell liquids. You should get over to that thread mentioned above and see if anyone can set you up.

As a very happy and liberated ex fagger, all I can say is, just get on with it if you want to quit. I am noticeably more lined than my peers and kick myself for smoking every time I look in the mirror!

The only reason people smoke is because they are addicted to nicotine

No...it's not the only reason. There are psychological reasons too.
Smoking becomes part of your routine and if, like me, you are a bit routine obsessed, then smoking becomes part of that. Nicotine addiction was the easiest part of quitting for me.

Agree ^ - and also the days when I feel like I really^ want one, it's not because of craving nicotine, it's because of the situation and the ritual, such as if I'm out with friends drinking in the sun, or if I had a stressful interview.

Alpies they sell those in the tesco pharmacy by me, they are still vapes but just have a nicotine capsule with none of the zoflora perfume! They look like a long cigarette.

Since I've stopped, I've had 3 mouth ulcers in a short space of time, and I've never had ulcers since I was a kid. Anyone else had the same?

Wash it seems to be fairly common to get mouth ulcers when stopping smoking, it should pass soon. Also, smoking fucks up blood circulation in your mouth which can hide gum disease, which is why giving up can lead to bleeding/receding gums and increased sensitivity.

Started smoking at 15 due to peer pressure, smoked until i was early 20s, stopped for years then just had a sociable one every now and then, finally knocked the habit completely on the head few years ago when diagnosed with aggressive breast cancer early 30s, I'm treated but I can safely say I will never touch a cig again.

I smoked for 10 years about 10 a day, I quit the day I got a mortgage by going to hypnotist, I really wanted to quit at the time which I think is half the battle. I really didn't think it would work but here I am years later and still haven't gone back on them. Best of luck with quitting

Thank you @wollyminded and @thenewaveragebear1983. Very much appreciated. Going to look into it now.

I'm allergic to all sorts of floral smells esp sweet ones which is why vaping hasn't worked for me.

This thread has made me ponder why I smoke. I don't like that I smoke. I just love going outside and have a nice glass of wine and lighting that cig. But since I started as a social smokers a few years ago, this has now developed into a full time occupation. I don't know how to stop. I crave it now. I like having a cig in my hands. So bad.

Given myself a date, let's see maybe this vype will work for me. Fingers crossed x

Be easy on yourself alpies, you'll find a way. This has been a lovely thread with smokers who smoke and smokers that don't smoke talking without judgement and lectures.

Threats, ultimatums, deadlines and finger wagging never worked for me, that's just not how my addiction (or personality) rolls. I've found a way to not smoke tobacco without too much fuss and that's great. You just keep trying different things.

Alpies, there are a bajillionty different vape flavours and you can also get unflavoured. The fruit and dessert flavours are the most popular but there are loads of others which are not so floral. Get yourself over to the stop smoking topic and someone will have suggestions.

Thanks Polter, never know that!

I am finally on the E Cig

It took a chest infection that had me in bed for days , steroids and inhalers and anti biotics

I hated smoking for the last years . Hated how it was a punctuation stop in my day

But I got so fucking sick I was like 'when I get better I cannot smoke again'

I prefer the E cigs as I don't smell and I still have that hit at the back of my throat (ugh)

So yeah my advice is to get the worst ever
Fucking chest infection.

I never ever thought I could stop by the way
And technically I haven't as I have this thing I puff on

Try 10 motives every main supermarket stock and they are an easy way to try £6.99 for one / go on OP