Aibu for getting annoyed with random old women (in the main) getting up in my baby's grill?

[FindingNormal]

I hate it. Baby was prem so is small. Everywhere I go strangers stick their face in the pram and make comments, usually along the lines of "oh what a tiny baby" some try to touch her and then I get asked how old blah blah. Today I was at the doctors - I was crying (having a bad day) and an old woman came up and asked if she could see my baby. I mean seriously - I had tears down my face and clearly had my fuck off shields up and yet she still couldn't help herself from intruding. I find it so weird- I'd never go up to someone I didn't know and comment on their baby particularly if they looked upset. Is it me?

Get used to it! Old ladies love to comment on babies and children. They are mainly very lovely and well meaning.

Sitting crying in the GPs with a cute baby in a pram?? You may as well have just demanded everyone come and talk to you. Of course people are going to come up to you.

Baa

So now it's the OP's own fault that she got unwanted attention?

Really?

Why should she "get used to it"?

Rainbow I completely agree with you.

Yes balaam of course I did. I engineered the situation deliberately to get attention and then complained when I got it. What a bitch I am. Ffs.

And a point of accuracy- I never said baby was in a pram. She was in my arms as it happens.

get used to it because people commenting on your baby is just something that happens.

I would not ignore a woman sitting next to me crying. I would probably comment on her baby to try and distract her and to cheer her up. It would make me a kind person not an aggressive one.

I think you will find findingnormal that you cannot control the way other people are.

Yes it is irritating if you are not looking for company but if you can't see that people may be doing it out of goodness not aggression then you may be depressed, yes.

Baa - why would you, a complete stranger who has no idea of why the person might be crying? Why decide distraction/cheering up is appropriate?

Maybe say "would you like a tissue"/"can I do anything to help" - but distracting? Cheering up? I don't think it's especially kind, actually.

And I wasn't sat next to her... I was sat alone deliberately- she walked over to me. But I see we're not going to agree on this.

Smile what an odd response.

It's human nature to say are you ok, your baby is lovely whats her name etc etc

if you are sitting next to a woman who is crying while holding a baby

Ok fine, well hopefully you'll be completely ignored in future!

Op YANBU at all!!! Ignore all the ridiculous comments!! Makes my blood boil when strangers try and touch my baby! A lady tried to touch my DDs face 1 week after she'd had emergency surgery whilst at the doctors... coughing and spluttering with her grubby fag hands! What the fuck is wrong with people?!? Never in a million years would I ever get close to a random baby, let alone touch them! I have perfected my 'mama bear' look now x

Sitting crying in the GPs with a cute baby in a pram?? You may as well have just demanded everyone come and talk to you. Of course people are going to come up to you so what should she have done if she didnt wdidninteraction? Pulled herself together? Got over? Isolated herself and the baby in their house ?

How hard is it to see that OP was feeling like crap and someone came over, completely ignored that and requested to look at the baby. She actually walker across the room to do so. Well intended or not its just rude. As is assuming OP deserves it for daring to be upset.

Adding a perm baby, germs, comments about how ""small"" she is etc.

OP

I agree about touching other people's babies - I'd never do it. But there seems to be a fair amount of 'how dare they look at my baby AND talk to me'. Especially if THEY are old women. The horror.

Oh apologies rainbow, I assumed your post was directed at me as, if you read my earlier post, (a few above yours) you will see that it does seem that way. It must be an unfortunate coincidence.

I have no reason to be particularly emotional, angry or ranty about this, and I certainly wouldn't have felt the need to even post again, except for the fact that it did seem as if you'd taken a lot of what I had said and twisted it to make it seem as if my feelings on the matter were anti feminist, (so only men have to keep their distance from women now? Etc). My apologies for thinking that was the case, when you say it wasn't.

I was going to make a joke about the grill (37, can't say I've ever heard it described as such) but some of these comments!

I didn't like it either OP, I just didn't.

Hope you're feeling ok

I don't think you sound like a dick or a horrible person and YANBU. I wouldn't like it either.
Hope you're having a better day today

Oh finding you sound like you are having a rough time and strangers can be annoying and intruding without meaning to be. If I noticed you were upset I'd have definitely asked if there was anything I could do to help especially such a new mumma. Iv got quite a low tolerance of people invading my space and did find using my caboo carrier out and about helped that as you couldn't see my wee one as he was a face smusher meaning he always had his face firmly squished into my cleavage lol so it would have meant they talked to the back of his head and my boobies lol. He still got plenty of admirers but from a comfortable distance normally.

Are you ok though do you need some help and space to breath a little? You said you have support I'm glad. Ignore the haters I laughed at the up in babies grill expression it explains quite well how it feels to you, 'a complete intrusion on you and your wee ones space' hope your toddler is loving being a big sister.

I found leaving the house with my babies when they were very little made me feel very vulnerable. People forget that feeling (or never had it) and can get a bit close for comfort.

You aren't being unreasonable and you aren't alone. Hope you are okay today.

Ugh I'm at the knuckle suckling . What the actual fuck ?

I agree with this ^^

You should be delighted anyone cares. You sound absolutely horrible behind your "fuck off shields" - this is really one of the most depressing posts I've ever read. Hopefully this is PND and you feel better soon.
This is literally the worst post I've ever seen on mn- sorry you've had to read that op. Unbelievable

I had a woman say my baby was sexy.
"Look at his big brown eyes, isn't he sexy"
I turned my back on her. The most Inappropriate thing I've ever heard.

And then the hairdresser called him sexy boy when he was 18 months old. Need a new hairdresser now.
Weirdos.

Yanbu. I can't stand it when people come over and hover over my baby's pram/touch him. It's a huge invasion of mine and his personal space and I hate it. It's like the whole being public property when you're pregnant thing and it just carries on once the baby is born!