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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Charlie Gard case

999 replies

LovelyBath77 · 06/07/2017 09:41

AIBU to feel the drama over this poor little boy is not helpful? I read the Pope and Donald Trump were suggesting they help- when several courts have agreed it is in his best interests to let the little boy die with dignity. I feel sorry for him as he may be in pain and it is unfair to add further to false hope for the parents as well. I also feel that many, many people has awful situations where babies die, sadly, for example stillbirths and other cases which are just un-heard and un-noticed and people have to deal with it, so why is there such a huge focus here.

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IfYouGoDownToTheWoodsToday · 07/07/2017 23:06

I know the parents much be utterly heartbroken and desperate, but how can they think giving their DS a treatment, which hasn't been been treated on mice?!

What if something catosprophic happens when it's administered? He has irreversible brain damage, cannot communicate in any form at all, and never will. But he's going to be experimented onSad

Notknownatthisaddress · 07/07/2017 23:12

"Charlie's Army" should be ashamed of themselves. Supporting keeping this boy alive. He is suffering, and in pain. Why would you want that continue? WHY?

stopfuckingshoutingatme · 07/07/2017 23:24

guys we don't necessarily know he is "suffering and in pain", I mean that its not just wishful thinking

I think we have to trust GOSH to some degree here, they wouldn't prolong this if that was the case

I suspect the poor fellow is not massively conscious

I mean that , and hope this

IfYouGoDownToTheWoodsToday · 07/07/2017 23:28

The Drs, from GOS think he's in pain, don't they? I'm sure I read that in the judge's judgement.

RMC123 · 07/07/2017 23:30

guys we don't necessarily know he is "suffering and in pain", I mean that its not just wishful thinking

No we done know for sure. And so you know why? He is so ill he can't even cry.
And that is more heartbreaking than anything else.

Longji · 07/07/2017 23:32

I was wondering the same Alcibiades I assume there is a medical reason as to why he can't be held but the family photographs that have been released recently seem more disconnected than previously too. The focus seems to be much more on the parents.
I haven't seen the video of the picnic but people have commented about something being "off" with the parents. I'm getting that vibe too, is it perhaps that they are detaching from him knowing what is inevitably ahead? But their words suggest otherwise.

stopfuckingshoutingatme · 07/07/2017 23:43

They have very very sophisticated systems, if they thought his suffering was intense, that would have been written and documented in the ruling.

he will also be on medicine to alleviate suffering, and again he is brain damaged

but yeah maybe I am just convincing myself

sorry Charlie to write about you this way - I hope you have no idea of whats going on Flowers

Ceto · 07/07/2017 23:44

These kids never had a chance but Charlie does . I'm proud to stand as one of Charlie's army

What chance does he have, user? He has a terminal illness, his parents agreed he has no quality of life, his brain damage can't be reversed, and he is now showing clear signs of going into organ failure. Why do you think it's appropriate for him to be dragged across the world to be experimented on?

Suppose you were told that you have an illness which will shortly result in you being unable to move, hear or speak and reliant on machines for breathing and for stopping you drowning in your own secretions. Just stop to think about what that would be like. Would you choose to do that, or would you choose to end your life peacefully?

flimflaminurjams · 07/07/2017 23:53

YANBU

Donald Trump needs to go away. American Drs who saw ££ signs (or $$) and spoke before they knew the full extent of Charlie's condition and thus giving false hope, should be struck off. But, in the age of social media, this is what happens, sticking their oar in to get likes and tweets instead of focusing on the things they should be focusing on.

And as for the CA - protests of "we will not be silenced", whilst in their front room Hmm and the selling of "Charlie" branded products makes me want to vom quite frankly.

At the centre of this is a child, and it only him that matters. His care, his special condition, his health and wellbeing. The team at GOSH are there to put the child's care first. No-one else. Not his Mum or Dad or friends and relatives who "can't make it for the weekend". That is irrelevant.

The Hippocratic oath is to help the patient and reject harm. They have to consider everything for the health of the child. Will moving him cause him harm? Yes. So he stays where he is. Will giving him an experimental drug not even tested on mice (that the American Quack now says won't work) cause him harm? In all likelihood yes. (Would you give an untested drug to your kids? There's people on here who won't even give their kids MMR vaccine, yet want Charlie to be given heck knows what). The Drs must stand their ground and do what is in the best interests of Charlie. Otherwise they are failing in their duty of care and position of responsibility, if they relent to pressure of keyboard warriors and mob rule.

We'd all like to think we know it all. We know about calpol, we know about asthma. Are we all experts on his congenital extreme mitochondrial condition? Nope.

I feel for Charlie.

I feel for the parents. I just see two people who need to get off the media and social media circus, its not good for them.

I feel for the staff at GOSH, treating Charlie, who are upholding their correct position of patient confidentiality, when in reality, if they came out and told it like it is, the media furore would soon blow over and Charlie could have the quiet dignity he deserves. But, I respect them for not doing this, I hope, not to detriment to the wonderful institution that is GOSH.

Notknownatthisaddress · 08/07/2017 00:03

@stopfuckingshoutingatme

guys we don't necessarily know he is "suffering and in pain", I mean that its not just wishful thinking

This says more about you as a person than you know. Assuming people saying Charlie is in pain, are wishing it on him.

Absolutely vile comment.

Shame on you.

He IS in pain. And I know this because:

The DOCTORS AND MEDICAL EXPERTS HAVE CONFIRMED THIS OVER AND OVER.

THIS IS WHY THEY REFUSED TO SUSTAIN HIS LIFE OVER AND OVER.

Got it HUN?

Hope so!

You lot in Charlie's army need to get a clue! The boy is in pain, he isn't ever going to live a normal life, and it's fucking cruel keeping him alive.

Oh no, am I shouting at you? Sucks for you.

DarthMaiden · 08/07/2017 00:03

@flimflaminurjams

Fully agree with your post

StiffyByng · 08/07/2017 00:14

Could we stop calling the US doctor a quack? He's an expert, and has been quite clear that his initial response was based on a misrepresentation or misunderstanding of Charlie's condition. Yes, he is open that he would still give it a go if Charlie were in the States but that's a symptom of the US healthcare system and not his own professional integrity.

stopfuckingshoutingatme · 08/07/2017 00:39

Assuming people saying Charlie is in pain, are wishing it on him

NO NO NO, that's not what I meant at all. I meant that its MY wishful thinking (poor choice of words) , rather its my belief and hope that's he is not suffering, or rather not cogniscent of his suffering due to his brain damage and the drugs he is on.

anyway I am not arguing here, read my post properly please.

stopfuckingshoutingatme · 08/07/2017 00:41

I cannot believe you actually accused me of being in Charlie's Army

sheesh. your post is actually fucking deranged

UserPlusLongNumber · 08/07/2017 01:02

You lot in Charlie's army need to get a clue! The boy is in pain, he isn't ever going to live a normal life, and it's fucking cruel keeping him alive.

My DD isn't living a 'normal' life. She's fed through a tube, uses a wheelchair and will never speak.

She lives the best fucking life.

Am I cruel for keeping her alive?

DailyMailReadersAreThick · 08/07/2017 01:05

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

stopfuckingshoutingatme · 08/07/2017 01:05

No you are not . I hate you would feel that way,

This whole case is very emotive and upsetting for so many people on so many levels , ethical minefield doesn't even cover it really .

DarthMaiden · 08/07/2017 01:07

@stopfuckingshoutingatme

Nobody on this thread who has read all your posts could possibly (reasonably) think that at all.

It's a very emotive thread.

I think we all should be sensitive in our posts, on the subject and to each other.

I'm not suggesting we should be shy about posting our views, but it's possible to do so without being inflammatory.

stopfuckingshoutingatme · 08/07/2017 01:08

Daily mail that comment was uncalled for in its verocity
What a way to speak to a mother who is dealing with tough issues and is finding this case emotive

I would ask for that comment to be deleted

stopfuckingshoutingatme · 08/07/2017 01:09

Thanks darth .

DailyMailReadersAreThick · 08/07/2017 01:10

What is verocity? Confused

DarthMaiden · 08/07/2017 01:11

Sorry - my last post might suggest I think you have been inflammatory stop I do not think think that at all.

DarthMaiden · 08/07/2017 01:12

Cross post...glad I wasn't misunderstood

DailyMailReadersAreThick · 08/07/2017 01:17

Well I don't know what verocity is but to clarify, I don't think it's helpful to shut down discussion about Charlie's quality of life by attacking posters who bring it up. It was clear that the quoted poster didn't mean any child with an illness should have medical aid withdrawn.

There are no cases like Charlie's in the world.

nina2b · 08/07/2017 01:18

Daily Mail, you should be ashamed.