To tell my neighbours their bonkers?

[Sparklyshoes16]

We've bought a house and absolutely love it and spending a lot of time and effort doing it up on the inside...as the weather is good we've decided to turn our attention to the garden and start clearing the jungle of overgrown bushes etc...as soon as we bought it we spoke to the neighbours and made it clear that we would be putting new fences up (matching the existing ones as our neighbour had taken out some panels) and getting the tree chopped back...the tree root is near the boundary but on their side...we had some people come round to give us a quote on how much to get the tree chopped back and to clear the garden etc our neighbour decided to come out and give them what for telling them it's a friendship tree and no one will be touching it as she hangs xmas tree lights up on it (there was non this Xmas just gone). I didn't actually know what to say so just smiled and said erm well no we discussed this and you agreed to have it chopped back and cut down a little and then ushered the garden people away from the mad woman...we know we have no legal standing on her cutting some of it down but according to her we can't make her cut it back either? We've checked the deeds over incased we'd missed something (we had already done that before we purchased) AIBU to tell her she's bonkers and to mind her own business? We've had no problems so far and always gone round to apologise for any builders noise but she has completely flipped on this...any advice?

Have you done any research at all, just a thought - if you go on Google earth there are some historical pictures (my area has 2 or 3 back to 1990's) that will give you some idea of how long the current features have been there but more importantly where they may have been before.

It may help, I've got a feeling you're heading for a full blown dispute either way with that one

Assburgers we don't want anymore hassle brewing than we already kind of have so won't be doing that...taking everyone's advice and getting legal advice and then go from there.

Sound so like she's the sort who you give an inch and will take a mile. I'd go firm from the start. Yanbu. I would chop and put fences back for sure. 'Friendship tree?' Not likely 😂

Does she like to chat through the gap when you're in the garden? (My idea of hell)

Winefixeswhine she was chatty at first but over time seems to tell us what to do...we started on the front garden a few weeks ago clearing overgrown bush/weeds etc making way for new drive to be put in luckily there is a clear (worn down) fence boundary there...new fence being put in its place when done at our expense and she's happy about that.

There is no such thing as a friendship tree is is making up bollocks to justify having her tree in your garden. She clearly wants a tree that is to large for a small garden and she doesn't want it taking over hers so thought she would use a bit of yours.
She is not going to be happy unless you give in to her so you might as well disregard her completely and do what you want with your property.
If she doesn't like it tough. She shouldn't have planted it there in the first place.

I would put up a 6ft fence all the way along! I like my privacy. By having a higher fence the tree when cut back won't look bad from your side. Even if you did not own the fence you are able to erect one on your boundary alongside any fence that is already there. Your are able to cut back any tree branches etc that overhang into your garden so I would just crack on with doing want you intend to do.

Ok so I haven't RTFT but here's my opinion (ie blatantly place marking..)

The tree is fugly - conifers always are. And it will keep growing, and growing, and growing - as conifers always do. So if it's not dealt with now, it will be a bigger problem waiting to happen.

So if it's your boundary, get a shiny new fence put all the way along, as high as legally allowed (2 metres generally). If any of your neighbour's trees/hedges are in the way and encroach the boundary, you have every right to remove them as long as you give your neighbour their property back at the end (ie sling the half a tree over her side).

If it's your neighbour's boundary, get a shiny new fence put all the way along as high as legally allowed. If any of your neighbour's trees/hedges are on your side of the boundary remove them as before.

I would not negotiate with this mad woman. The law is the law is the law..... Cut her dead and document/photograph everything.

Yes half a tree will look a bit shit, but you won't be able to see it behind your 2 metre fence. And actually it will look ok from her side too - kind of. Not your problem though.

Can I add, I would be less concerned with what you can see above ground where conifers like this are concerned. It's the root system that you should be concerned with. If it's on the boundary line the roots don't know about boundaries and it's probably well established in your garden too.
If I were you, I'd be contacting my solicitor who helped with the house purchase and a tree surgeon who can help with the actual tree and the roots of said tree.

Interesting point about the roots - conifers generally have very shallow roots, which make them pretty unstable for their size - another reason why their a crap idea for a garden.

And tree surgeons are all very well but they are expensive and who is going to be paying for their advice? You know you want the tree gone from your land - just check your legal position and get rid.

The legal position with trees overhanging boundaries is really simple.

You can cut off every sinlge inch that crosses the boundary line.

She can scream it is her tree til she is blue in the face, but you are allowed to chop off every branch and leaf that crosses the line.

I totally understand why you want to work with her on this, you have to live next door to her for the next whatever years. But don't let that push you into a place you don't wnat to be.

The fence is harder as you need to prove it is yours. BUT if it is erected on YOUR side of the boundary, I would call her bluff.

Dear neighbour, is it really your fence? OH that is a pity because it is on our land. Please can you remove it by Saturday, or we will remove it for you, so we can put up our own fence on that line, which is just OUR side of the boundary line. By the way we will charge you for the cost of removing it.

I am a gardener and my garden is in the Yellow Book. I like trees so I would trim it back and plant some more to add interest. It is not attractive enough to be a stand alone specimen and needs some friends. Slightly aghast that you need a garden designer, a tree surgeon and a solicitor to decide the fate of a tree that a) isn't yours and b) in the grand scheme of things is actually quite small.

BUT ... that fence is horrible. It's not the tree that needs to go it's the fence! OP if you have had a professional garden designer tell you that fence is nice then I'd look for another designer. Designing a garden round a fence like that is plain wrong.

not I agree fences are not attractive, but OP wants a clear enclosed boundary (fair enough as her neighbour is a PITA).

I would have high fences all around then disguise them with climbers and shrubs.

I can't believe that a garden designer is expecting you to ignore the lack of fence, and design around the unattractive tree that you don't want in your garden! One of the critical things from a garden in this sort of instance is, I think, the ability to have privacy - and also to contain offspring and pets so the garden is clearly not fulfiling that at the moment!

I would be all for taking a hedgetrimmer and saw to it and very neatly cutting off at your boundary so that you can replace the fence panels.

My two cents...

"where the fence is should actually be over a little more her way but we're not even going to go there!"

I strongly advise you don't let that drop. If she is so insisant that the existing fence is hers, take the whole thing down and give it to her (so you can't be asscused of theft as with the tree-cuttings). Put the new fence in on the correct boundaries.

Fuck giving her land that legally belongs to you.

And chop the bloody tree in half.

Question for you. According to the correct boundary details (as in that on your deed, not where the hedge is), is more than 50% of the tree actually on your land?

Read "fence" for hedge, doh

Nice tree imo

It's not a nice tree! It's a hideous acid-green monster!

This is a nice tree

I'd say...

Hello neighbour, we will be cutting back the tree to the boundary line in order to put up a new fence. We can do this by law.

If you'd prefer, we could take the whole tree down, and buy you a tree of your choice, that you can plant on your side of the boundary when the works are done.

What do you think neighbour? The fence is going in, so the choice is yours.

Thanks. Lovely weather isn't it. lol.

And then she will freak out. But yes good idea in theory.

I think I would put that idea in writing and give it to her, with a date when you will be starting the work and you therefore need the decision by. And keep a copy.

Whoever it was upthread who called it a Lego tree is spot on imo. Not that it matters - it could be a gold plated magic tree for all it matters legally.

Wow, just read your updates.

Personally I go to an effort to empathize with the other side and I find that avoiding disputes is always best with neighbours, personally I would probably leave the tree alone, but she can't order you around and refuse to compromise like that.

I would clarify your legal position, then offer her what the choices actually are, and if she stamps her feet and says she wants her own way again, calmly reiterate that you need to come to a compromise - absolutely getting her own way with your garden is not on the menu.

If the fence is on your land and previous house owners put it up then it is yours,no question.
I would go the while hog,take downed sting vile fence,put up new nice fence on the boundary.Chop our half of the tree and roots offer her a replacement tree for her fairy lights
I think you just have to do it and not be friends, she's going to complain about you having friends with children around anyway.

It's a fucking hideous leylandi and makes the garden unbalanced and less secure. Chop it, put the fence in, throw the branches over.