To be scared she is going to kill me and steal my family?

[mrsMmrsIMrsSSI]

My first ever post on here (many NC's ago) was about my really obnoxious neighbour who harassed me by knocking, texting, Facebook messaging at least 5 times a day.
I plucked up the courage one day to tell her to fuck off and she stopped for just under a month.
I feel like I'm going crazy she keeps copying little things and I know she's doing it and she knows she's doing it and it's creeping me out - here is a list of examples of her fucking weird behaviour.

• when she sees DS has new clothes she buys her DS them too. For example the same little pair of trainers, parka, hats, etc.
• she bought the same pram. Even in the same colour.
• she dyed her hair to the same (fairly unusual) colour, a week after I did mine. --Cost me a bomb and I put a box dye over it a few weeks later

--- I lied through my teeth about DS's primary school applications as I knew she'd copy. And she did. In the same exact order.

• she bought my winter coat.
• her husband bought my partner's motorbike DESPITE not even having a license, claiming he was going to get one, it sits redundant outside their house but meant she could come over to ours with mundane questions about it for weeks.
• she started shopping where I shop.
• signed up to the same GP, despite being with her practice since she was a child.
• signed her DS up for same hobby class as my DS.
• she knowingly exposed my children to chicken pox and then was very dismissive of it.

And then today to top it all off she announced she's calling her new baby the same name as my baby with one letter difference.
So it would be equivalent of Harley and Harvey. It's not those names but that kind of idea.
DP thinks it's creepy but also really funny but seriously wtf else are you going to do? We are moving next March purely because of her. I can't bare it any longer she's hysterical but so so suffocating!!

Tell her you're moving in May and then just disappear one day. Otherwise she may get even weirder the month or two beforehand.

Its not funny, dont confront her. Complain to the police, keep a diary and use the Paladin link CaptainMarvelDanvers posted on the first page.

This sounds awful
Hope it gets sorted soon op

OP, I still think the fact that she's obnoxious and interfering is making you over-aware of normal enough similarities between two young, currently SAHMs who are neighbours, have young children, and with partners who work in the same field and who live in the same type of house presumably have similar incomes.

If you discount the school applications, GP, club and same place for shopping as normal for neighbours, aren't you just left a with combination of coincidence and someone who likes your taste in coats, hair colour and baby names?

Don't get me wrong, she sounds unpleasant, but you do also sound quite involved with one another -- how do you know she drove whatever distance to buy her pushchair? How does she know which schools you applied to? We live in a small, nosy village, where people know a LOT about one another, and I'm certain the family who live behind us don't even know my son's name, or where we buy groceries...

Change your routine and stop telling her anything. She is your neighbour not your friend, so really it's none of her business eg. Where you are going on holiday, where you bought your coat. Stop feeding her any information. And as it's affecting you that much tell your partner to speak to her partner about it, telling her to back off.

OP, sounds creepy. Just don't engage with her. When she messaged your DP whilst you were on holiday he shouldn't have replied. Her DP sounds as if he party to all this madness so I wouldn't have sold him the bike either if you want to distance yourselves from this couple.

How did she know which hobby you signed your DC up for? How do you know the order of Primary schools she selected? If this is all through her chatting with you I would knock that on the head and do not converse with her or keep the conversation very terse and neutral. Don't disclose any of your business or ask about hers and if you notice she has copied something I wouldn't mention it as she may be doing all this to get a reaction from you.

The clothes thing is annoying although a lot of kids wear the same/similar clothes as most parents of young kids shop in the same places esp. if you live in a small town. Not trying to downplay her behaviour as she sounds weird but some of it could be down to coincidence rather than stalking.

How and why does she have your number and Facebook profile? You sound like you allowed her into your life

Sorry OP she sounds annoying but you sound paranoid. She is not stalking you (unless you have failed to tell us that she following you everywhere) rather she is copying you. You don't own rights to a pushchair/motorbike/parka jacket. She sounds like she is the sort to go on holiday and hang on to randomers or sit on the end of their sunbed

Annoying, yes. but there is nothing that you could take to the police that they would be concerned about. My neighbours dc all go to the same school as my dc and they have many extra curricular activities in common. We often bump into each other in the surgery too. Should I be concerned? Your chickenpox allegation makes you sound more than a tad paranoid.

Oh x-post - lots of posters have made the same points as me!

More to the fact how does she have your partners number .

Meant to add that the local housing estate is full of people like this. One dc gets a coat/trainers/pencil case/bike and the following month there are 30 children with the same item. People like to be seen as being in the 'in' group. The same goes for names, especially those with yoonique spellings.

I can sympathise with you OP.

The police couldn't do anything when something similar happened to me a few years ago and to be honest, I don't think I was taken seriously.

I had to have counselling and was medicated for anxiety.

Do not tell her where you are moving, give the next owners a false address and redirect your mail through Royal Mail. There is a charge for this but it will be worth it for her not to have your new address.

These are all such low-level, minor things that I honestly don't think I would even notice. You sound as if you are as invested in her as she is with you. Some people copy, so what? The same hair colour or pram doesn't mean she is actually stalking you.

I lied through my teeth about DS's primary school applications as I knew she'd copy. And she did. In the same exact order.
How could she copy if you had lied?
How do you know exactly what she put down?

I thought this too?? It doesn't add up

How doe op know so much about her neighbour if she is the one being stalked?

I'm assuming stalker neighbour put the schools down in the order OP told her she was going to (i.e the not true version).
Sympathies OP this sounds really disturbing and upsetting - definitely record events and speak to the helplines mentioned. I don't know whether it's worth having a formal, documented 'I don't want contact with you' so there's hard evidence if she does harass you or whether that might make things worse?

Not funny. Is creepy. Don't think she will murder you because she'd then have to get her husband to murder her so you can be the same even in death

I would back the fuck away and have nothing to do with her. Super weird.

I would also raise the issue with the GP. He won't discuss her with you but the insight into her behaviour may be very helpful for him

I read it as she told neighbour her DC was put down for school 2, 3 and 4 but send DC to school 1 then the neibour saw DC go to school 1 then transferred her DC to school 1?

This is possible in our area only two schools are over subscribed.

I would also raise the issue with the GP. He won't discuss her with you but the insight into her behaviour may be very helpful for him

You what? I'm laughing at the thought of OP making an appointment to give the GP 'insight' into one of his patients

If moving sooner is an option then do it. Keep a diary and report to police, she's batshit and stalking is horrendous. My DH was stalked by a mad school gate mum. To some it sounds ludicrous but the police were helpful and things have settled now they are involved

She doesn't say anything about transferring schools, just that she put down the same schools in the same order - I'm not sure whether that means the real version or the lied version. Either way it makes no sense.
If it was the real version, there's no way she could have known.
If it was the lied version, how does the OP know what she put down and surely it means they ended up at different schools.

OP the title of your thread is very dramatic and I assume you are joking.

You have to go find Disney land holiday details, you know the mega expensive ones and leave them out so she can see them, let the stalker spend thousands on a holiday you have no intentions of going on... crazy lady will book it...